I fly the red eye from Aberdeen to Heathrow first Monday of every month. Stand out announcement for me was some years ago. After some preliminaries it went something like, "Ladies and Gentlemen, as Paul Simon once said, there may be fifty ways to leave your lover, but there are only five ways to leave this aircraft. If we could have your attention for just a few more minutes the cabin crew will tell you where they are, as well as talk you through some important safety announcements!" It got a laugh from even some of the most hardened business travellers on that flight. Feel free to use.