(This is a fast ramble. I just don't have time to edit it down to a quarter the size.)
Yes, I've certainly posted on Zolpidem in the past. It's been a tremendous help to me for ages, resting my back in a way that natural sleep failed to do and helping when I'm trying to fit in with the folk in who's houses I'm staying. Some people go to bed before I would normally have dinner. So weird.
I did however try to throttle back on the quantity, breaking a lined tablet in half, then nibbling a bit off one half. Got it all worked out to take the minimum possible.
Driving and various computer (PhD organized) IQ tests, and the
great game Bloxors all seemed to put me ahead of the game for my age, though use for several days in a row did seem to coincide with senior moments like looking in the fridge for something...but not quite sure what. Then came the change.
Quite recently, and with a new prescription, the timing seemed different, and certainly the after affects were. For a long time I would have said they were a life-saver for me, with no discernible affects if used sensibly, but now that seems to be lost. Personally, I'm trying very hard to quit the habit as they say, but I have several reasons why I need to force my level of sleep past the natural level. That busy brain thing - described so well above - is just one of them. Sooooooo annoying when I've been fighting sleep at teatime.
First and foremost, I have no flying duties anymore...driving is the main public safety issue which I take very seriously. 15 hours following a very small amout of H type sleeper. So no help at all to sleep deprived aircrew.
My huge post on "benzo's," was made a sticky, but the rage that they caused in me...or more correctly, the release of suppressed rage,(see
gingernut recently) was too serious to consider using them for anything but diagnostic tests. The point being that I wouldn't have guessed that I had that latent aggression, so anyone might be so affected, and perhaps they won't know until it's too late.
I'm really surprised at the comparison of Valium and Zolpidem, for me they're chalk and cheese, but then, that's one person, and as I said, I had throttled back to a minute dose.
It all comes back to that argument about being very tired while flying, V taking something that will leave you feeling fresh, but may have some problems stacking up deep in the mind.
Recently, a well known old-timer said words to the affect, 'Hard luck, it goes with the territory.' He didn't say, 'If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.' But he may as well have done. Absolutely no help at all. A fortune in training costs, huge mortgage and a mass of kids...resignation is not an option, and management is not going to give a sympathetic ear. You're in love with the job anyway, so you just have to find a solution.
I'm getting some success with going over the story of an appropriate book. The scene set in a more peaceful era, ignoring totally the facts of the poverty and hardship. I don't stick to the plot at all if there's a stressful part, but just live in this blissful period as well as my mind can hold it. Quite often upon waking, I'll realise that I have only got a few moments into the story before falling asleep, but all too often, I'll be realising this at 02:00!
and the whole process has to be started again.
Living in the fantasy forms a barrier from the turmoil for those important minutes.
At the end of the proverbial day, I know that I have to put right, or at least face up to the problems that are causing the mental turmoil. High workload, like learning a new aircraft, never fazed me, it was deeper worries that gnawed away at my sleep. How we face up to life's problems is perhaps more important than how they are finally solved or accepted, but coping is hard to do from a depressed standpoint. So often we need professional help, but that's a no-no for aircrew. The poor old pilot has to grit his teeth and pretend that his mind is quite different to ordinary humans. This is so wrong.