Not sure how long this will remain here
but this is WHY we NEED more LAMEs.
"Ode to the LAME"
The Airline Transport rated pilot;
Leaps buildings in a single bound.
Is more powerful than Concorde. Is faster than a speeding bullet.
Walks on water. And discusses policy with God.
The Multi-Engine rated pilot;
Leaps short buildings in a single bound.
Is more powerful than a Boeing 767.
Is as fast as a speeding bullet.
Walks on water on a calm day. And talks to God.
The Instrument rated pilot;
Leaps short buildings with a running start and a favorable wind.
Is almost as powerful as a Boeing 737-200.
Nearly as fast as a speeding bullet.
Walks on the water of a deep puddle. And talks to God if specifically requested.
The Commercial rated pilot;
Leaves fingernail scratch marks at the top when trying to leap a short building.
Loses a tug of war with a BAE 125.
Can fire a speeding bullet. Swims well. And is occasionally addressed by God.
The Private pilot;
Rarely clears a Scout camp tent.
Is run over by a single engined aircraft.
Sometimes recognizes a speeding bullet.
Can dog-paddle. And talks to animals.
The Soloed student pilot;
Runs into buildings.
Recognizes a Cessna 172 two out of three times.
Has never seen a speeding bullet.
Can stay afloat under instruction. And talks to the wall.
The Non-Soloed student pilot;
Trips over door sills on entering buildings.
Says "Gosh, look at the airplane" a lot.
Does not know what a bullet is.
Only stands in the shallow end. And mumbles to himself.
The Licensed Aircraft Maintenance Engineer;
Lifts buildings and walks under them.
Kicks aircraft out of hangars.
Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and chews them.
Freezes water with a single glance. And talks to every body.
The Licensed Aircraft Maintenance Engineer IS God.
