Had the FE not permitted the throttles to be opened at Tenerife, then it is possible that the accident might not have happened. But that decision would have happened at 0 KIAS on the ground, not at a critical state of flight. Similarly, had the Concorde FE or FO said, "Capt - we are overweight for take-off and we must recheck the RTOW if you wish to take-off with an 8kt tailwind", instead of reacting to his "Top" call, the Concorde accident wouldn't have happened. Did they know that they were overweight - in which case they were complicit - or did they harbour their fears but did not have the positive CRM manner to state their concern?
I agree that a controlled forced landing might have resulted in less fatalities, whereas to depart controlled flight at high AoA and low airspeed would virtually guarantee a 100% fatality rate.