Lizzimac, I have given this a LOT of thought, and put my thoughts on paper and thought it through from lifestyle, financial, 'right thing to do' and 'follow my heart' points of view.
In all cases my decision was the same - MAM was not for me as I had previously thought. I know some of you here who tried/are still trying to get in may find my decision hard to comprehend, but in the end it was the right thing for me to do in all of the above respects, not only for my financial and career satisfaction but for my personal wellbeing as well.
As for 'doing what I always wanted to do', yes, I will be doing that too!
IJWTF, thanks for your kind words. rest assured I am doing what I want to do, which just happens to also be what I feel is RIGHT for me to do!! I still get to do the job I always wanted (flying) but I get so much more than that too! All the things you mentioned which are important to me like lifestyle, feeling accepted and valued by my company, etc.
It's great to see so many of us finally getting the good karma from all of our trying and waiting and preparing by getting flying work - wish you all the best in your o/s adventure, rock the orange!!!
(Oh, and be sure to swap your funny flying stories with us, ok?!
)