An Teallach. Fellow ancients have seen the RM variant of your Destruction Test. Be less specific about what and how much to drink before hand then set to with nothing but empty brass shell cases to fragment said upright piano and post everything through an open scuttle (a round window long gone from the Maritime Orbat). In Albion, this was completed in 15 minutes but seem to remember enough sharp edges and other dangerous bits to render many of the team less than fit for purpose the following day. So not much use for fitness tests. Sorry.