Having not done any f/w flying for 5 weeks, and since the wx was better than expected, I decided to commit aviation today. Over a pre-flight cup of coffee I started chatting to someone; it turned out he'd done 20 hours of a PPL and gone solo many years ago, then given up. "Why?", I asked. He started by saying it was lack of time and money, but I got the feeling there was more too it than that. Anyway, remembering all I'd said on this thread, I decided maybe I should put my money where my mouth is, and I asked him if he wanted to come flying with me.
It was fairly hazy, with a lot of low cloud, so I didn't go far, just messed around in the local area, then did some circuits, 50 minutes in total. I apologised to Ken for my first pretty ropey landing, but he seemed happy, and they got better after that. After the flight he seemed exceedingly happy to help me refuel and put KF to bed at the far end of the airfield. I got the impression that he enjoyed being part of something he'd been in some way on the fringes of before. But it was over lunch (which he bought, and so he should, as I didn't charge him for any flying) that the real reasons for his giving up came out. A different instructor every week, so that he never really got to know any of them. Only managing an hour a week at most, so that months as a student became years. Realising he had no idea what he'd do, or what he could do, when he got his PPL. Being scared a couple of times while flying with low hours pilots who, without going into it all, were definitely over-confident.
I'd been afraid he would be bored flying with me, but he said it was the first time he'd realised that flying could be relaxing, and he'd thoroughly enjoyed it. I told him I do this for fun, had simply wanted to bore holes in the sky and get current again, and didn't believe in stretching myself to the point where I and my passengers get scared. Then I heard more about over-critical instructors, and PPLs who are deadly, dismally serious about their flying, so that it just isn't fun and you're permanently stressed about it. And I told him about long distance trips, and the fun of flying on the continent, and landing on the beach at Barra, and things like that.
I learned a lot from him. I hope he learned something from me. At any rate, we both had a very pleasant flight. I'll definitely grab strangers out of the cafe and stick them in my aircraft more often.
Will he take up flying again? Who knows? But I think this definitely gives us all some insight into why people give up flying.