Put things into a little perspective.
A common airline interview question along with slight variations goes something like this:
Your a brand new Captain and to celebrate you have your father on board for your inagural flight as the skipper. Soon after liftoff you hear that your father has a heart attack and will likely die if he doesn't receive immediate medical attention. The wx (or other suitable problem)at the airport you departed from just went to 1000 RVR and the mins for the approach are 1200 RVR. What do you do?
If you say land anyway you likely won't get the job. The idea being that you not risk all the passengers lives for the well being of one.
Sounds like he was trying to get all available info and make a decision. Simply asking ATC questions or their opinions on routing etc does not in any way cede authority. They along with other aircraft are of immense help in developing a plan to deal with problems.
I understand the pilots reluctance to leave holding. Your basically committed after you leave the hold and start eating up your contingency fuel down low as you configure, especially if you have already held for awhile.
To back up Scott, the wx services received the past few years from centers has improved vastly. Especially so when the volume of traffic is low.