1) The Aircraft commander has ultimate responsibility for his aircraft and passengers - the fact that he was this indecisive is pretty poor and shows poor captaincy skills. If I was his training captain I'd be looking to do a few more rides with this guy.
We can't make the decision for him, just advise of the knowledge we have and it's up to him. If he chooses to follow an ATC recommendation then that's up to him. We cannot overtly make a command decision for him on how to operate his aircraft. Our remit as ATC is safe, orderly and expeditious flow of air traffic. If he wants us to fly the aircraft for him too that costs extra
2) If there's an aircraft in the air in a specific location then yes, we'll use it to get information on local conditions - that's all part of the Controller / Pilot relationship. We don't however have an aircraft out there 'looking' for specific routes around weather. This guy would have been out there doing it and we would have been picking his brains.
Hope this helps