BTT
An excellent post I thought and I agree with most of it.
"we must be seen to be fighting it in a fair, democratic and humane way"
In an idealistic form, your correct. To do as you say infers many battles. One in the military sense, another in gaining the trust of the Iraqi's. However the most important battle for purposes of perception is in the media. You can win the hearts and minds of the Iraqi's and still lose the war in the media, ala tet offensive. Notice that few of the accomplishments that would showcase the ideals you raise are reported?
How many Zogby polls from Iraq that show a general optimism for the future of Iraq receive the air time that they should? Its not news if an Iraqi is optimistic about his future. If it bleeds it leads, If it talks it walks. I remember those words from a class I attended in the military on how the press decides stories.