2 Red Arrows flying up the East Coast of Scotland.
Red1: "Red2, am I contrailing ? "
Red2: "Negative"
Red1: "Uh, OK - then you're on fire
"
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Harrier in the circuit at Waddington in marginal weather.
TWR: "X27 are you VMC?"
X27: "Negative, RTB"
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Possibly same Harrier, a week later ... in similar marginal weather
TWR: "What's your impression of the circuit?"
Harrier: "Sorry, don't do impressions"
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And a very tired Scot Mil Controller to a US F111....
ATC: "Jazz54 confirm you're not on this frequency ?"
Jazz54: "errrr ...... that's a 'negative' Sir"
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And another Scot Mil US F111 exchange
ScMil: "Raven02, what's your next reporting point ?"
Raven02: "We're routing to STABBS"
ScMil: "Actually, it's pronounced 'Saint Abbs' , what's your next reporting point?"
Raven02 : "Ahh, we're routing to Saint Ornoway"
<STN - Stornoway VOR>
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And lastly, large mil exercise off NW Coast of Scotland, involving carrier groups etc...... F14 Tomcat climbs out of low level seeking radar pickup from Scot Mil.......
F14: "Scottish Mil this is <garbled> requesting climbout"
ScotMil: "?? err .. Testicle 01 ....? ...this is Scottish Military, squawk 6501"
F14 : "JESUS H CHRIST, Scottish, the callsign is FASTEAGLE 01, FOXTROT ALPHA SIERRA TANGO ECHO ALPHA GOLF LIMA ECHO !! "
