SAR bloke,
I've been out a while now, but at the end of my career I found most RAF Officers messes to be empty, with no life or spirit.
Most young single officers moved out as soon as they could, whether that be renting (usually with other officers from the same base), or buying a small house locally.
I was also aware of junior officers living in surplus married quarters.
Getting a room in an Officer's Mess, if you wanted one, wasn't a problem.