My own feelings on wider matter of mental health is that we fail to get it right both inside and outside of the military. Why is that? There are many professionals that care and want to do the right thing, their very best, and there are many of us that want to help and support too. But maybe that is the problem, that there is no fix - like alcohol and drug addiction, there is no cure, you just try to manage it as you go through life amongst people also living with it? Maybe we all live with it, but we all have different thresholds? Or maybe, some are “wired” slightly differently? What is for sure, it is amongst us and is a silent killer for some that suffer from it.
What I fear is that out of Friday’s sad affair we will be subjected to yet another patronising DLE video or workshop. Again, my own opinion on this is that because mental health is a very bespoke and personal thing, for many these ‘magic bullet’ courses are actually more damaging than they are good. It was the same for the so-called “decompression” stipulated for those returning from TELIC and HERRICK - quite frankly the last thing I needed was a couple more days, sat in Tommy Tucker’s with the same folks I’d been with for the past 3, 4 or 6 months! I doubt I am alone with those sentiments.
I personally believe that the sooner we are truthful about this, the better. We just aren’t going to fix this, we are only going to manage it. Every one’s experience and medical needs are going to differ (which is why I believe you hear good and bad things about the Services’ support and management of cases). Last Friday showed how things like social media “beacon alerts” can really help in saving lives, but now the tricky bit begins for everyone - the rebuilding of an individual to enable them to learn to manage what they have, have always had, and will continue to have.
I say all of this as someone who has helped save someone very close to them from taking that final step. Someone who kept it hidden from me daily for around 20 years. I know they will never be cured and I help them manage the ‘black dog’ of depression on a fairly regular basis along with the medical support they receive. I know I can only help and that one day it may turn out very differently - all I can do is help them manage their health so they don’t reach that point again. I don’t even pretend to understand what they go through, as I can’t, and I find it totally alien to me (and I have experienced bad things like close friend/family deaths, divorce, one of my children developing a chronic condition, children leaving home, seeing/doing bad things on ops and having things taken away from me - all the worst things in life). But I know that by being there, and helping through what they continue to go through, it is helping them manage their daily torment that appears totally different to anything I experience.
I also know of 3 Aircrew mates in the Service for which we were too late. No amount of courses or awareness would have saved them. They wrote no letters/notes like we saw on Friday and behaved entirely normally before they saw themselves off. All at different points in their life with different circumstances. We will never know fully why as they took those reasons with them. We will just have to accept, like we do with aviation accidents, that this will happen and all we can do is try to manage the risk of occurrence to as low as reasonably practicable for those we do know about.
Sadly, one thing that does have to happen is that until that person is well enough in their mind, then in aviation, we have to stop them doing the thing that they love doing. When I went through divorce, I sat down with my flight commander and stated that I needed a week or so break from flying - not because I was going to punch myself out into the HAS roof and kill myself, but because my mind was not on the job. But for those with suicidal thoughts, then it has to happen - events like the tragic GermanWings incident show what can happen. There is no ideal way around that, even flying solo, the risks are too great. The same happens with driving too, and only after that individual is fit enough in their mind will their care team advise that they can go back to it. When it comes to security clearances, perversely it is easier to manage once the person has admitted to their mental health deterioration, rather than before when they are highly susceptible to manipulation. But, as mental health cannot be cured as such, and only managed, then the risks of those holding higher clearances are often deemed too great to manage.
Sorry that is all very bleak, but I have seen this from another side (and I know there are many lenses to view this through). All we appear to have in our toolkit from how I see it is:
1. Looking out for each other and encouraging people who want to talk about it.
2. Using social media “beacon alerts” to find folks when things go bad.
3. Getting professional help when it happens - even if it creates more upset initially.
4. Being prepared to help manage it for the rest of their lives.
5. But recognising that you also have a life to live and that “one size does not fit all” in these matters.
Now, it’s a beautiful Sunday in the UK, let’s go enjoy it!