I think you have all taken this the wrong way and are beating your chests to show how experienced you are and unavailable for such a demeaning job.
I intend to apply with a few caveats.
Owner.
Must be between 18 and 40 y.o and female.
Be a non-smoker (or have lubricant that prevents smoking).
Available for massages after flights.
Available for back washes when required.
Must hold a drivers licence to ferry me to and from establishments that serve liquor
Needs to have lady friends that will accompany owner on flights.
Lady friends need to be able to give massages.
After every 50 hours supply a first class ticket to overseas destination off my choice.
Have experience in bore management.
Communication skills aligning with only relevant topics to be discussed.
Desirable.
Medical experience a benefit particularly when accompanied with a lady friend.
I am still working on the caveats and happy to take advice on what should be included.