I need some advice.
I am not sure if this the write place to write this but I thought If I share my story with someone I might get some advice.
So I am from Bangladesh and I wanted to do something different so I thought of becoming a pilot. I knew no one in the aviation industry and had no idea what flight training is about. I then contacted a school in south of the UK ( i will not mention any names as i want to remain anonymous ) and they accepted me, then in went to the uk and had my first lesson. I didn’t really feel anything about my first flight. I know a lot of people feel very excited on their first flight but I wasn’t. First 4-5 flights were ok but after that I didn’t enjoy flying, I started hating it. But i ignored the feeling as I didn’t think I had the option to stop as I came specially from Bangladesh and my parents put a lot of money for my accommodation and everything. And the biggest thing was that every single relative of mine knew I was becoming a pilot and they were all excited and I felt if i comeback I’ll have to hear from people from the rest of my life that I failed or I am not good enough. I know some people in the west might not understand this but unfortunately the society we live in people keep talking about other people.
Then i changed schools as I wasn’t getting enough bookings. At that time I had around 45 hours and I still hadn’t completed my PPL. I found a school in the midlands who said they will book me often and i was satisfied. There was a 5-6 month gap between changing schools. So here i was now in a new school. 4 months in i managed to fly around 35 hours. I was very close to do my cross country and then the test but then my visa was due to expire and to renew that i had to go back to Bangladesh. When i returned the school was sold to some other company so everything changed. They only had one instructor who was very rude and would often get angry about something in flights. I stayed patient and flew with him 5-6 times as they only had one instructor at that time. And in those 4-5 flights i was extremely depressed because he would keep getting angry and would say I’m nit working hard and that i will fail the test. Then he sent me solo for a nav and before i went he told me that he thinks I’ll get lost. I never had such an awful instructor who instead of giving the student confidence he was being extremely negative. Luckily they got a new instructor and i started flying with him and now I’m waiting for the weather to improve and go do my Qxc.
So in total it has been 2 years almost a hundred hours and Thousands of pounds spent by my parents and i still have nothing to show for it and I still hate flying. I sometimes wish I never have to fly and that the weather stays bad everyday. I feel guilty about everything and I deciding to become a pilot is my biggest regret in life so far. Inside my heart and mind I want to finish my PPL and never fly again in my life.I feel I’m just wasting money as most of the time the weather in the uk is bad and all i do is sit around. But I feel if i quit I’ll always have the guilt of wasting my parents hard earned money and I’ll have to listen to my family and my relatives about me quitting flying for the rest of my life,
Thank you for your time if you read this and i hope someone can give me some advice that what they would do if they were in my place.