Its a team effort, but until the controller gets to ride the beast too wherever it might end up, controllers are there ultimately in an advisory capacity with the implicit trust of the crews to provide a service.
There are some wonderful and talented people working in the NY area doing a tough job in ATC, this guy appears to either be having a bad day or is overloaded.
The fungus guy for his part didn't do anything initially different to what many of do day to day, the whole "I've been flying etc etc" from him was pointless and unnecessary.
The wider point needs however to be reiterated, the Commander is ultimately responsible, so never allow yourself to be be bullied, cajoled or even unduly influenced into a decision that you fell isn't safe.
I've read all sorts online about this potentially causing capacity problems in NY airspace due to a variety of complex issues, from the perspective of the commander Id say so what? that is a problem for someone else to resolve, a damaged or mayday aircraft will also cause significant disruption most likely far worse than a few delays.