A Travellers Tale...
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A Travellers Tale...
Are we sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin...
Once upon a time there was two happy chappies who were off to a land far far away near the southern tip of Argentina. They were departing on a Thursday and they turned up at the departure point and checked their bags in with much excitement. Soon they made their way into the departure lounge where they were expecting to be whisked off at mid-night. But at 23:00 when all the passengers finally in, they were told that there was a delay of 24hrs.
But they were happy as there was a chance of a spare B747 being flown up from Gatwick. They were soon disappointed to learn that it wasn't going to happen as the Gatwick airport authorities wouldn't let it fly as it was too noisy. It might wake sensitive people up at that time off night, ah bless...
They made enquires to see if there was a Chinook in the area to take them home only to be told that they had missed one by 30mins. Never mind they thought, they had more tricks up their sleeves. They asked MT if they could give then a car to go home and they said they would like to help, but couldn't give transport to off base personnel despite all working for the same company. MT their home base said no as well, accommodation could be provided there so they could help either.
Why weren't they being nice to them they didn't know...
Luckily one of the travellers brotherinlaw lived 10 miles away and he gladly gave them a life back arriving at home 2am on Friday. After spending the day at home with their respective happy wives.
They called the terminal at 8pm that evening and were told that the flight was back on. Off they went with one of the wives driving them back up to Brize for the next part of their adventure...
On arriving, they found the terminal empty. "Oh dear" they thought, "what could have happened?" Oh, it's delayed again until mid-day tomorrow they were told. Luckily they had some accommodation on base and although they wanted them to share a room, one of them sweat talked the staff and managed to get separate rooms.
At 9am on Saturday they were woken rudely by the cleaning staff who wanted them out of their rooms as someone else might need them. They dressed quickly as they were keen to get on with their journey when a man in some green and brown clothing with a dayglo jacket on with DAMO written on his back said, "There is another delay and we'll know more in an hour." An hour passed and then another when the kind man with all the info said that the spare part to fix the aileron that was flapping at high speed was here, but it had to be tested first at Luton and that we wouldn't be going until mid-night.
So all the passengers, who still hadn't got their bags back hung around all day making joy and merriment, when the two travellers decided that enough was enough and they headed off base to find a pub and have a curry. Oh how they ate, such a full spicy meal knowing full well that all the other passengers and the flight crew would get the benefit of it later...
They checked in again at 10pm and mid-night came and went when at last at 1am on Sunday they boarded the aircraft, only to be told that there was a delay until 2am because of another problem. They sat there in their comfortable Club Class seats knowing that the lesser people in life were all staring at them from Cattle Class, if only they had done better at school...
The engines started and off they went down the taxiway, it was all becoming so exciting, they hadn't got this far before. They turned on to the main runaway then off again to go around the loop at the end, hearts were beating faster finally they were going to depart and then the aircraft came to stop...
Nothing happened for 20mins... The captain came down as he liked to talk to those important people in the big seats and said there was another problem with the aileron and that the engineers were on their way. After a while the engineers said they wanted more light so off they went back to the stand. At 3.30am with much apprehension amongst the passengers, the Captain informed them that they weren't going anywhere that night... sigh, even the wings of the great aircraft seemed to sag...
They got their bags back at last so they could get out of their smelly clothes and were told that they might go Sunday night or even Monday, they just couldn't tell, oh dear, why didn't anybody know anything? Transport back home was arranged as a MT vechile just happened to be there and finally at 7am they were off again and trying to sleep in a transit van for the journey. They finally got back at 8am and went their separate ways back to their homes and their happy 
bewildered wives...
At 2pm they phoned Station Operations at Brize only to be told that they didn't know if was going to be fixed again or not and with another cunning plan, they phoned the terminal who said "It's was 100% certain that they were going that night."
Was this just a ploy to get them all herded together again? "Now where had they heard that before" they thought...
MT relented and agreed to pick them up and take them back, soon they will be on their way again happy as ever and maybe, just maybe they can all say that they all lived happily ever after...
PP
Once upon a time there was two happy chappies who were off to a land far far away near the southern tip of Argentina. They were departing on a Thursday and they turned up at the departure point and checked their bags in with much excitement. Soon they made their way into the departure lounge where they were expecting to be whisked off at mid-night. But at 23:00 when all the passengers finally in, they were told that there was a delay of 24hrs.
But they were happy as there was a chance of a spare B747 being flown up from Gatwick. They were soon disappointed to learn that it wasn't going to happen as the Gatwick airport authorities wouldn't let it fly as it was too noisy. It might wake sensitive people up at that time off night, ah bless... They made enquires to see if there was a Chinook in the area to take them home only to be told that they had missed one by 30mins. Never mind they thought, they had more tricks up their sleeves. They asked MT if they could give then a car to go home and they said they would like to help, but couldn't give transport to off base personnel despite all working for the same company. MT their home base said no as well, accommodation could be provided there so they could help either.
Why weren't they being nice to them they didn't know...Luckily one of the travellers brotherinlaw lived 10 miles away and he gladly gave them a life back arriving at home 2am on Friday. After spending the day at home with their respective happy wives.
They called the terminal at 8pm that evening and were told that the flight was back on. Off they went with one of the wives driving them back up to Brize for the next part of their adventure...On arriving, they found the terminal empty. "Oh dear" they thought, "what could have happened?" Oh, it's delayed again until mid-day tomorrow they were told. Luckily they had some accommodation on base and although they wanted them to share a room, one of them sweat talked the staff and managed to get separate rooms.
At 9am on Saturday they were woken rudely by the cleaning staff who wanted them out of their rooms as someone else might need them.
They dressed quickly as they were keen to get on with their journey when a man in some green and brown clothing with a dayglo jacket on with DAMO written on his back said, "There is another delay and we'll know more in an hour." An hour passed and then another when the kind man with all the info said that the spare part to fix the aileron that was flapping at high speed was here, but it had to be tested first at Luton and that we wouldn't be going until mid-night.So all the passengers, who still hadn't got their bags back hung around all day making joy and merriment, when the two travellers decided that enough was enough and they headed off base to find a pub and have a curry. Oh how they ate, such a full spicy meal knowing full well that all the other passengers and the flight crew would get the benefit of it later...
They checked in again at 10pm and mid-night came and went when at last at 1am on Sunday they boarded the aircraft, only to be told that there was a delay until 2am because of another problem. They sat there in their comfortable Club Class seats knowing that the lesser people in life were all staring at them from Cattle Class, if only they had done better at school...
The engines started and off they went down the taxiway, it was all becoming so exciting, they hadn't got this far before. They turned on to the main runaway then off again to go around the loop at the end, hearts were beating faster finally they were going to depart and then the aircraft came to stop...
Nothing happened for 20mins... The captain came down as he liked to talk to those important people in the big seats and said there was another problem with the aileron and that the engineers were on their way. After a while the engineers said they wanted more light so off they went back to the stand. At 3.30am with much apprehension amongst the passengers, the Captain informed them that they weren't going anywhere that night... sigh, even the wings of the great aircraft seemed to sag...
They got their bags back at last so they could get out of their smelly clothes and were told that they might go Sunday night or even Monday, they just couldn't tell, oh dear, why didn't anybody know anything?
Transport back home was arranged as a MT vechile just happened to be there and finally at 7am they were off again and trying to sleep in a transit van for the journey. They finally got back at 8am and went their separate ways back to their homes and their happy bewildered wives... At 2pm they phoned Station Operations at Brize only to be told that they didn't know if was going to be fixed again or not and with another cunning plan, they phoned the terminal who said "It's was 100% certain that they were going that night."
Was this just a ploy to get them all herded together again? "Now where had they heard that before" they thought... MT relented and agreed to pick them up and take them back, soon they will be on their way again happy as ever and maybe, just maybe they can all say that they all lived happily ever after...
PP
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What a sorry tale, and I am so sorry for you.
It happened to me too, but on the way back from Cyprus. Poor Timmy got sick, and it took a week to fix him. So with the exercise in Cyprus all finished, and nothing to do for a week, except check if the flight was "on" every day, the whole of 244 Sig Sqn(AS), plus half of TCW spent a week getting leathered all day and night on the strip in Limassol.
Eventually Timmy was restored to health and we went home to Brize. The trip home was very short. Our hangar was the one next to the air terminal!!!
I hope you enjoyed the delights of Carterton.
It happened to me too, but on the way back from Cyprus. Poor Timmy got sick, and it took a week to fix him. So with the exercise in Cyprus all finished, and nothing to do for a week, except check if the flight was "on" every day, the whole of 244 Sig Sqn(AS), plus half of TCW spent a week getting leathered all day and night on the strip in Limassol.
Eventually Timmy was restored to health and we went home to Brize. The trip home was very short. Our hangar was the one next to the air terminal!!!
I hope you enjoyed the delights of Carterton.
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Update update update, hot off the press...
The travellers were called at 17:00 and told that they were definitely going this evening, good they thought, time to pack bags and get ready once again...
Transport picked them up and just to double check, they made a phone call to the terminal to discover that the flight had been CANCELLED once again.
But despite the Movers having all the contact numbers, in time honoured tradition, no one could be bothered to call anyone on the list to tell them.
Wives are most happy again...
PP
The travellers were called at 17:00 and told that they were definitely going this evening, good they thought, time to pack bags and get ready once again...
Transport picked them up and just to double check, they made a phone call to the terminal to discover that the flight had been CANCELLED once again.
But despite the Movers having all the contact numbers, in time honoured tradition, no one could be bothered to call anyone on the list to tell them.
Wives are most happy again...
PP
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Homebound from AAS few years ageo, Albert gets to Bahrain and nosewheel goes wibble. After sitting all night on the pan it's eventually fixed and off we go to the Island. Because of the delay crew duty hours rears it's ugly head. Many hours in the terminal, thence off we roar. Somewhere just short of Souda Bay the nav kit and pressurisation goes wibble, so we chuck fuel out and back to Akro. Even longer wait to be told you are staying the night, so it's off to the mess and get totally over-refreshed. Next day we are off! - to Incerlik! Pardon? Another large chunk of my life spent looking at not much, thence yet another Albert swings through, oh joy! As we scrabble up the ramp a car bomb goes off not far away. And we got struck by lightning over western Turkey and lost some electrics. At this point we would have got out and pushed, but we pressed on to somewhere in Europe for fuel, and home. 3 days.
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Not the first.....
You should live in the middle of all this. You were lucky it wasn't an RAF 3*! You could've spent your entire tour waiting to get to points South!
Only to get there and not get back!
Only to get there and not get back!
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PP, can only hope that all this counts towards tour length as you had commenced travel even if you hadn't gotten too far..... delay en-route and such 
Keep us read-in mate. The combination of "been there, done that" and "sucks to be him" is, as always, delicious.
Cheers!
Keep us read-in mate. The combination of "been there, done that" and "sucks to be him" is, as always, delicious.
Cheers!
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The Amazing Flying Machine
The two happy chappies have now arrived in the land far away because I saw their amazing flying machine when it passed through ASI. I was told by the lying witches of the UK that the amazing flying machine would return the next day to collect people from this warm and volcanic land such that they could spend some time with their family in the cold and drought stricken land where the lying witches live (UK). But like the two chappies I also have to wait because the amazing flying machine wont be coming for at least another day and a half. I am allowed to stay at home and do not need luxury accommodation in the fine palace called Gateway because I'm an adult and can wake myself up in the morning whenever I like.
