Do airliners have keys?
Do airliners have keys?
Guest
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Well, you see, new airliners have ignition keys, but after a while, with nightstops and all, they get lost.
When the crew misplaces the airliner keys everyone has to go back to the hotel to look for them, while the gate staff is left to make up stories about tech delays. Sometimes if the airplane isn't too far from base they send a spare set sent out, but eventually they have to get maintenance in to hotwire the airplane. That happens a few times and they just install a switch.
You'd think it would be a security problem, but seeing as you can start most Boeings with the keys from an old Chevy Impala, it doesn't make much difference.
[Edited to fix an ugly line break.]
[This message has been edited by Luftwaffle (edited 10 April 2001).]
When the crew misplaces the airliner keys everyone has to go back to the hotel to look for them, while the gate staff is left to make up stories about tech delays. Sometimes if the airplane isn't too far from base they send a spare set sent out, but eventually they have to get maintenance in to hotwire the airplane. That happens a few times and they just install a switch.
You'd think it would be a security problem, but seeing as you can start most Boeings with the keys from an old Chevy Impala, it doesn't make much difference.
[Edited to fix an ugly line break.]
[This message has been edited by Luftwaffle (edited 10 April 2001).]
Guest
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All I can say is thank gawd jets don't have'em ! ..... otherwise aircrew hotel bars would be full of rather pathetic pilots on the pull shouting out, "Hey, has anybody seen my jet keys ?!"
.......... or worse still, there'd be the jet keys equivalent of 'penis envy' as in loads of sad git 'medallion man' types nonchalantly (although purposefully) leaving the keys to their Boeing / Airbus mega jets on the bar top in a pathetic attempt to impress some lowly maiden.
Be warned these blokes do exist, i.e. just today ( on the Falmer road, between Sussex University and Woodingdean, East Sussex ) I saw some chap in a rag-top Saab (its roof down - and it must have been all of a sweltering 10 degrees Centigrade ), with music blaring, sitting there in full pilot garb, i.e. uniform jacket on, complete with silver stripes, and arm draped albeit somewhat uncomfortably - but with full visual / visible effect - over the top of the passenger seat, plus 'Top Gun' shades..... jeez if he'd just had his hat on as well then it would have been too funny for words.
Now might I kindly suggest that if anybody knows who this knob actually is, that you tip him the wink that - far from looking 'cool' - he actually (imho) looks a complete A1 prat !
Nb. I wasn't able to determine if he had a copy of 'Handling the Big Jets' upon the cars back shelf coz I was almost blinded by the tears of laughter rolling down my cheeks !
.......... or worse still, there'd be the jet keys equivalent of 'penis envy' as in loads of sad git 'medallion man' types nonchalantly (although purposefully) leaving the keys to their Boeing / Airbus mega jets on the bar top in a pathetic attempt to impress some lowly maiden.
Be warned these blokes do exist, i.e. just today ( on the Falmer road, between Sussex University and Woodingdean, East Sussex ) I saw some chap in a rag-top Saab (its roof down - and it must have been all of a sweltering 10 degrees Centigrade ), with music blaring, sitting there in full pilot garb, i.e. uniform jacket on, complete with silver stripes, and arm draped albeit somewhat uncomfortably - but with full visual / visible effect - over the top of the passenger seat, plus 'Top Gun' shades..... jeez if he'd just had his hat on as well then it would have been too funny for words.
Now might I kindly suggest that if anybody knows who this knob actually is, that you tip him the wink that - far from looking 'cool' - he actually (imho) looks a complete A1 prat !
Nb. I wasn't able to determine if he had a copy of 'Handling the Big Jets' upon the cars back shelf coz I was almost blinded by the tears of laughter rolling down my cheeks !
Guest
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No, an airline's wish list should consist of the following:
1. Get a magnetic key-hiding thing for somewhere inconspicuous, like underneath the wing. (Too bad there's no plant on the airbridge to hide it in, but this will do fine).
2. Get one of those clamps for the control column (or preferably two for extra security).
3. Issue notice to pilots: ALWAYS keep left hand seat in a forward folded position so if anyone had been in there, you would know.
(Also, be sure to always park in lit open spaces at night with plenty of people about, and carry mace with you at all times).
SFly
1. Get a magnetic key-hiding thing for somewhere inconspicuous, like underneath the wing. (Too bad there's no plant on the airbridge to hide it in, but this will do fine).
2. Get one of those clamps for the control column (or preferably two for extra security).
3. Issue notice to pilots: ALWAYS keep left hand seat in a forward folded position so if anyone had been in there, you would know.
(Also, be sure to always park in lit open spaces at night with plenty of people about, and carry mace with you at all times).
SFly