Trouser Teaser
 

The following was set to me by a mate from Innsworth and is alledgedly a lift from the intranet:

10 May 2005 - ATTENTION RAF (FEMALE) PERSONNEL
Would you be willing to exchange 10 minutes of your time for the opportunity to influence the future design of trousers for RAF female personnel?

So what would you suggest?

This is serious stuff so no upside down leg jokes please.:cool:

...well, that's killed THIS thread at birth, then........

16B

Perhaps they should go for those hipster style trousers with a one inch zip which seem to be the thing for yoof wimmin to wear these days. Or so I'm told....:D

But please, not with Vickie Pollard-inspired rolls of blubber hanging out over the waistband - and the female equivalent of British workers' bum from behind...:yuk:

The trousers will need to be generously cut to cater for those that are ‘gender transitional’ and have not yet had their tackle removed.

BEagle, the is more correctly termed the muffin roll, I believe!

The Profanasaurus calls this particularly unattractive piece of the anatomy the "gunt" and it is often sported in addition to "chits"

In days of old when we wore "Battle Dress" my BD Blouse never quite managed to stay over or even in contact with my trousers, despite the provision of buttons designed to hold them together. The bit of one's body that stuck out in the gap was referred to as a "Beer Gut".

At the time, certain WRAF personnel wore trousers identical to those that we chaps wore, apart for the absence of a fly. I believe WRAF trousers were issued to enable those poor girls who had their legs put on backwards to cover up the damage. Beer Guts are, or were, slightly less unsightly than back to front legs... :hmm:

Blacksheep, our national service WRAFs wore skirts with ever rising waist lines. Matched to their vertical stature, national service high energy, high carb diets and the days before the invention of tights . . .

They were the batting staff to dozens of baby navs.

I leave the rest to your imagination.

You don't see them like that nowadays.

I take it that there will only be one waist size made, possibly XL

For all the slim new new recruits, don't worry, you'll soon fit into them.

BEagle
And the waistband must be low enough to show off the bum tattoos.

............. and the thong sticking out at the back.

Ah yes - that tacky piece of coloured dental floss that Vicky Pollards wear.

Thongs are for whores.

BEagle - Tell us what you really think.

Does anyone know where i can get a thong serviced?:D

thrower

service costs not too bad, but the full decoke and declagging can be a bit costly, dependent on usage of course.

Thrower,
A crack mechanic should be able to sort it out...

A Crack Mechanic, should be able to find in the directory under Royal Navy.

SH

I believe this item of apparel (the low slung lady's trouser) to be colloquially known as 'Minge skimmers', m'lud.

Does anyone know where one might get a young blonde WRAF officer serviced? Apart from the Mess at Odiham, that is?

I'll get me coat.....

Oh dear. It would appear that Mrs BEagle does not wear said apparel (purely to hide the VPL).

BEagle obviously very jealous of those of us who are priviliged to watch donning and un-donning of the garment by our wives, mistresses, girlfriends.

One understands that the exposed bits of thong on the afterparts are known as "whales' tails"......

Or just a welcome reminder that girls show more than their ankles this generation :)

Even better where can a young chap FIND a young blonde WRAF officer?

The trouble is, many shouldn't be allowed to show more than their ankles!

1" above the waterline jeans just don't suit blubber bums with gut rolls. Neither does anal dental floss.

Thongs look like hookers' jockstraps - bum-hugging knickers are infinitely more attractive.

Technically, that would be Open Crotch Panties, and for the more active within the profession they come with the opening surrounded by removab le absorbant inserts.

I will bow to your obviously considerably greater knowledge of such matters than mine......

Er, excuse me gentlemen,

May I add a little decorum to this thread?

I am shaped liked a woman should be in that my waist is where my waist should be (not two inches above my ...) and chesty bits and bottom bits are larger.

I would be more than happy to partake in such research as it pees me off that I cannot find trousers to fit round my waist (which goes in!!).

Cheers

Whirlygig

Whirlygig

You obviously do not meet the specification. may I suggets you either PVR or indulge in a serious Maccy D crash diet until the trousers fit.

:)

Retard

Susannah

This should be examined closely if this subject is to be discussed properly.

Anyone remember WRAF Passion Killers?

Knickers with elastic so strong, that if you got your hand in 'em, it cut off the blood flow and rendered hand inoperable?

Nothing like what Ms Moore is wearing BTW.

I have a radical but practical solution.

Perhaps we should make our women don the garb of our Arab friends' ladyfolk!

That way a 'one size fits all' romp suit would hide all of the aforementioned unsightly bits and we chaps could be left to imagine Christina Aguillera is under there! Providing she has blue eyes, of course....

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.........

Drool, dribble....

Actually I have the DVD!


:O

Kris, you may have something.


Seriously I thought the pregnancy outfits looked very smart, smarter than the high waisted, high hemmed skirts as well.

Who is it that designs these uniforms?

Obviously someone who lives on a different planet. I know that it is a uniform and therefore fashion does not come into it whatsoever, and rightly so. But the designer is obviously an entrepaneur who has absolutely no qualifications in clothing design. probably the sort of bloke who tucks his vest into his pants (didn't offend anyone, did I?!)

Combat 95 looks good. And is practical.

Why can't we get it right with our 4's (or 8's to you older sweats)?

I say scrap the bloke who designed the current uniforms and get a team of young naval personnel together to have a crack themselves!

Oh great, at least three changes of dress code before tea time then. :hmm:

Too easy?