Never fall out with the Nav ...
 

Well it made me laugh :}

Wife wins divorce after map-reading row

Coff.

That touches a nerve. Fortunately my wife and I [both in our seventies] have reached an accommodation after 50+ years of animated discussion.

Tricky route: the best map-reader/ navigator/ weatherman in the world navigates. The second best driver in the world drives.

Night driving: the best night driver in the world [senior management] drives. At least she can see. My role comprises check list [lights on?] and catering.

Other driving: 2 hours on, 2 hours off, modern satnav, bright red car, lights on regardless.

So far so good.

In my house it's called Sat Nag and should always be left at home!!:ok:

I understand you can download 'wife' software for certain SatNavs?

It will come up with helpful prompts such as "We should have turned right at that turning", "I don't think we're going the right way", "I meant left - didn't you understand?" and if you don't follow the directions for 2 consecutive prompts, it will simply say "If you won't listen, you can do it yourself" and will then go into 'sulk' mode - tutting and sighing at random intervals.....:hmm: Once every lunar month it will go into 'PMT' mode and will be totally unpredictable...:eek:


You Know It Makes Sense!

While I refer to mine as the 'Sit Nag'.

But only when she's unlikely to hear me.

BEagle, I did'nt even need that for the first Satnav I had. If you went off the track it decided there would be a single word said by the device, "Recalculating" in a pissed off bitching betty tone and I always expected a tap on the shoulder or a rolled up newspaper to the back of the head.

I prefer the less formal approach. No Sat Nav, no map. Mrs CM sniffs the air and says "that way." And off we go. We always end up where we wanted to go - except in Oxford. Don't know how it works, but why should I care?

Courtney ... Mrs CM clearly got here Girl Guide Nav Badge then :ok:

I wondered that, but she claims never to have belonged to the organisation, Coff. She is here telling me it's ESP. I wonder what that is? I'm sure some of you here may be able to explain.

Courtney

Just put it down to "some women have it".

I have met a couple - mostly in the military - who just "had it"
when it came to Navigation. I think "spacial awareness" and
relating the small (you and where you are) to the big picture
(map, map to ground, North, the Sun) helps.

Just like some women "have it" when it comes to dance moves,
"strutting the cat walk" et al while others look like a fish floundering :O

My wife can't remember which way to turn when she comes out of a shop.

At least, if all else fails, you can always eat your Nav!;)

OAP

Mine just saw the article in The Times - she is still calculating the cost/benefit of taking a similar line.............

Bitchin Betty in Bath pulled a cracker.

She turned me in to this road with loads of cars parks and no chance to turn round. After duly counting down she commanded 'turn right now'.

Bit tricky. At hand rail height was a stout metal rail. It was set in to a low wall across the intended route. The road descended steeply step after step. The only option was press on. 'Turn around when possible.'

The road got narrower and rounded this block of flats. Cars were now double parked and the gap narrower still. I just squeezed through as thankfully nothing was coming the other way. I often wonder if they ever consider ambulances and fire engines.

ESP is something to do with cutlery?

The ideal satnav would have, for use after the third disregard of commands, a screen shot of a teddy being flung out of a pram and suitable sound effects.

Go on Garmin, you can do it.

Mrs W's most annoying trait when "navigating" is when at a junction or roundabout expostulating "that way, I think" with a vague wave of the arm. Not too good on the difference between left and right either! But being a "Leo" she is always "right"!

"annoying trait when "navigating" is when at a junction or roundabout expostulating "that way, I think" with a vague wave of the arm."

Yes, you have to love that.

train them to cry thus:

"my side" or

"your side or

"on, on",

or "STOPPPP"


it works if you reward them with a choccy or something during training, or a timely tap on the moist nose.

She hasn't got my password, has she?

I'm still looking for the 'bear' on the left/right! Anyone else seen it?

It might have been a badger Dendmar.

My "nav" usually takes her "nav" kit with her.....


http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y29...ps72c4d6d9.jpg

ST ... IFR Nav ... very clever :D

Never had any problems getting around in the UK, Europe or even the States. Always seemed to be able to point a car in the correct direction. But driving around Oz, NZ and South Africa, guaranteed to get lost everytime I went out if I didn't do lots of pre-planning. Suspect it may be related to the Sun, having a Southern or Northern bias. Finding direction whilst driving in the UK was almost an inbuilt function. Direction of lamp post shadows and time of day would provide a pointer without even thinking about it. Doesn't work South of the Equator. :sad:

Oddly enough, this disorientation is something I found during a spell in the Falklands.

My wife's sense of direction whilst driving is so refined that, when trying to decide which way is left, she extends the thumb and forefinger on each hand while gripping the steering wheel. The left hand conveniently spells out 'L' to show her which way to turn. You may think this endearing. I despair.

alisoncc

Places I have been to, even in Aus that I just can't get your bearings in
or it takes a few trips to sort out.

Other places / cities even dead flat areas where you can't see the
horizon, no problem whatsoever.

Haven't worked out what it is either.

East Streets post made me think so
here is a question for you all.

In our family, my father and I have no problems navigating.
Father is LEFT handed, I am LEFT footed.
Brother so so at Navigating, mother awful.
Both are righties !!!


I would like to know if anyone thinks being a lefty
in anything helps.

http://www.bearbath.co.uk/images/pho...sign-1-330.jpg

In Pontius Navigator's meanderings in Bath, he may well have found it on road out to Wells.

SWMBO doesn't even bother especially after one day when coming from big food store she said no we have to go there pointing to one way and I duly ignored and went the correct way.

I just said "Why were we going the other way again ?" and got an "Oh".

Time and again with no Sat Nag I have managed to find my way into and out of places such that now it now gets left alone. :E

My old man was a professional navigator. Could go round the world with a sextant, tables and dividers. In a car it was something else.

He got an Irish driving licence (no test) and would set off in the general direction of Ashby-de-la-Zouche. Some hours later ADLZ would seem to have passed us by, then, spying a sign he would charge off to ADLZ. Time later, still not there, but assiduously heading for ADLZ the penny dropped.

Having passed ALDZ he had forgotten that he was supposed to go to the next town.

I've had a few Aircrewmen like that....

Mrs T specialises in sitting in the passengers front seat of the Vulvo and calling out `turn' instructions with no warning.
At these times I often quietly drift into Walter Mitty land and imagine what we'd be like as a crew in a fast jet with her in the back seat, at a coupla hundred knots and a coupla hundred feet on a nav-ex somewhere...

"Turn"

"Where"

"Er, that valley about 5 kms back" :O

Left/Right; Port/Starboard?
 

So, I give her the map - sitting in the back seat of course - from where she drives and the instructions consist of turn....watch OR turn....no watch. It's the only way she can do the left and right bit - poor dear! If she forgets to wear her watch we are, as they say, screwed. :E

Be Careful
 

Nav Leader on a certain sqn in the far north took the family in their car by ferry to Norway. They arrived in darkness, some time, and many mile/km later his wife remarked "isn't the sun coming up on the wrong side of the car"

Me Mum turns 94 this July....and just less than a year ago she totaled her car. That was the way we got her to stop driving finally. She did in a young man's car....then....in a separate event returned to the scene of that collision and ran down the wooden utility pole at the same intersection saying her brakes were not working.....but I digress.

I now play the "Driving Miss Daisy" role....as the Driver. God Help me but the guy who wrote that Screen Play knew my Mother.

Arm wave Nav.....is naught for Mom.

One day I was informed we were off to a small town about two hours away to visit two of her nursing school friends. One was in a Nursing Home in one town....and the second was in a Nursing Home in a second near by town. I allowed a fit of Dumbass hit me....and did not get the details of the two places assuming Mom knew where they were. Remember....it is two small towns we are talking of here.

Sum total of the one was....."It is just off the main road through town!". No...it wasn't...and there are more than one "main roads" now. Of course she did not have the address, phone number, or name of the place. Now....walk into a local convenience store (after an hours drive all over said small town) and asking if there was a nursing home in the area....to be asked.....yes...."Which one you looking for?".

I bagged that one....and proceeded to our next stop....to visit with my Niece. Who of course was not home. Odd, Mom did not tell the Niece we were coming as of course she would be home. Home on a work day at lunch time? Now who would think? Stroke of luck....said Niece did drop by quite by accident.

Niece knew the address for the elusive Nursing Home....and also the second one we were to visit. A quick phone call to the next place was a real time saver....the old Women had died two years before thus we could skip that stop.

My second attack of Dumb Ass was to attempt to do a Post Trip De-Brief with my Mom. That accomplished nothing!

I do so look forward to these outings with my Mom.....which I rate right up there with Root Canals and chewing Tin Foil!

I'm a bit right/left dyslexic. I remember when I was doing my instrument approach training shooting a PAR and the GC was saying 'Left 5 degrees' and I was correcting right which of course compounded the error. I now hold up my hands in similar situations and say out loud 'This is my left hand I need to turn in the direction of this hand.' This assumes of course that I'm holding up the correct hand in the first place.

I organised a Sqdn treasure hunt one year. As you can imagine it was a total disaster as I think my instructions for the second road junction were to turn right when it should have been left which then totally bolloxed the rest of the directions. People were still coming back hours later.

On the other hand mrs thing is like a homing pigeon. We can visit a totally strange town, park the car, walk around for an hour or two (I'm lost after the first turning) and then when we decide to return to the car she says 'Turn right here, second left. third right, through the traffic lights and we'll be at the car park'. She's never wrong.

Edit: I'm also one of those saddos that looses his car in the supermarket car park. I went to the NEC once to an exhibition (oddly enough!) and it took me over an hour to find my car when I left. You try and hide it though don't you, sort of saunter around in a 'I haven't lost my car, no actually I'm walking in a purposeful manner somewhere' way.

In my Teutonic Tank we have choices:

C1. No electronic options, I make all the routing decisions based on memory dump. This is known as PratNav :\

C2. Built in system which modifies national borders at will and insists "Turn right" followed closely by "YOU VILL TURN RIGHT!!" Known as NazNav.:E

and

C3. An aged TomTom with HM the Q installed as the `voice`. This is the preferred option as its the only voice my good lady will not argue with...

;)

Just checked my log book: JP3, JP5, Hawk, Hunter, Harrier, Jaguar, Lightning. Funny old thing, I never fell out with the Nav.

And then I got married...

Dear gods the neanderthal sexism on this thread beggars bloody belief.

Then again, I guess the piss stained old farts here are probably stuck in the early Middle Ages. :rolleyes: