Look, well done and everything.

I have a genuine question though.

My grandfather was in the AAC at Arnhem in 1944.

Am I missing something?

TBSG,

This is something I saw your chaps do all over the Reds,Yelows,Greens etc of the Emerald Isles time and time again :E

If you want a cast iron cert of a wind up for AJ take the baterries out or put some dead ones into the crewroom TV remote control...............he'll go feckin daft :ok:

SOTG
I think you will find that your grandfather was in the Glider Pilot Regiment which years later became the AAC.

SOTG
Further to Clockwork Mouse's info, the Army Air Corps of WW2 consisted of the Parachute Regiment and the GPR, but was disbanded after the war.

TBSG,
Wrong Smith. The scout story one is about retired from the RAF a few years ago. Never lost his daft northern accent, unlike this bradford lad.

The prize is for the best --- > written < ---- story. Write em as you tell em in a pub.

jeep

Hong Kong
Scout with the 'Star Trek away team' on night standby for anti AA (Aider's & Abetter's) Op's. The Scout is fitted with Nitesun and Bomb racks loaded with four 4 inch slow falling flares and 2 flares attached to the bulkhead in the back.
The Story goes:
The Scout is called in to help the RN and RM patrols with the capture of 2 AA speedboats each carrying about 4 II's (Illegal Immigrants). The AA's can do about 40knts and start to pull away from the patrol boat and rigid raiders, with the introduction of the Scout to the chase and the use of the flares to illuminate the area, the patrol boat manages to catch one of the speedboats.
The Scout and the rigid raiders now turn their attention to the remaining AA, who to reduce weight and gain extra speed starts to throw the II's overboard thus slowing down the pursuing rigid raiders as they have to pick them up.
The Scout now on it's own uses the nitesun to illuminate the AA whilst awaiting support from either the patrol boat or the raiders, meanwhile one of the crew comes up with a plan, they will drop low level over the speedboat and armed with his night stick the crewman is to jump into the boat James Bond style and arrest the AA's. The front crew now over dosing on adrenaline think this is a great idea and try to convince the 'Obs' whilst decending over the boat, As they reach the boat the 'Obs', who has so far not been convinced and replied 'with respect sir's f***off ' and other such useful phrases to demonstrate his noncompliance with their orders, has hatched his own plan and lobs one of the flares straight into the speedboat, Luckily the AA's thinking it was a bomb bale out, which was the right choice as the flare ignited the fuel and exploded. thus bringing the chase to an end. :8

Flew with Mick Lord on occasion - always good for a giggle. After hammering around low-level for 30 minutes, I stopped and turned to Mick who was holding a map. "OK, Mick, where are we?"

"I dunno, you brought us here"

The other one that sticks out was a tale he told of going on task with his OC in NI. They'd turned up at a grid to support a ground patrol but couldn't find them. After a fruitless search, and a refuel, Mick began to think that the task looked familiar. A quick check of the JATOC task-sheet provided the illumination. He was reading a task that he'd done two days previously.

So did they paint a speedboat kill mark on the A/C?

On the subject of HK, one from the FAA.
.
6Z3 slog stardate 17 Sep '79. Mission: Load lift skids-wet Scout.
.
In thanking us (couple of slabs and honorary membership of the 660 club bar) for dragging us out of RAF Sek Kong pool on our day off (the RN SK detachment worked 2 on 5 off in those days;)), Maj ***** explained that he'd shut down as usual on the beach (below the high water mark, if you hadn't realised) for a leisurely breakfast part way through his mission, and then couldn't get it started again. Extremely grateful, he went on to explain that that particular cab had a history of the igniter playing up; it had happened twice the previous week!!
.
Aah, them were the days, chasing II's and Boat people for 3 months.

Who was the guy (was it the OC?) who during Night flying on Otterburn failed the 12,000Kg snatch in a Lynx after lifting post-refuel without disconnecting the hose first? Fortunately the Torque meter passing through 140% and a Red flashing "Bowser Still Connected?" caption helped him before anything too serious happened.

Not forgetting 662 Sqn's impeccable FARP demo to the 200 or so Eastern Bloc Exercise observers in Germany in the mid-eighties, where the RN Exchange pilot decided to prove that the Navy have bigger flares than the Army, while failing to notice that the Lynx pair he was leading was approaching the FARP down slope. Gravity and Bernoulli work as advertised, tail rotor hits the mud, TR drive shaft shears, Lynx spins about 270 degrees during which the main rotor blades chop through the bowser hose which is laid on the ground, AAC Lt in the RHS rapidly beginning to understand that his Navy buddy has now deviated wildly from the script, pulls the ECLs and bring the Airshow to a rapid and bumpy end. During all this the Lynx has been spinning like a dervish with blades contacting the ground, surrounded by the FARP team (Mick Scaife) and not one of them got so much as a scratch.

The best bit was seeing 200 chins hit the ground from the Eastern bloc observers, and then when the dust (mud actually, it was Germany) settled and it was clear everyone was OK, they began to applaud politely. I think it was Wellington who said, "I don't know what they'll do to the enemy; but, by God, they frighten me. ..."

Hong Kong 81
Scout carrying out night casevac drills with 7GR in Tsuen Mun at a 6 side football pitch surrounded by high rise flats. two 'casualties' are loaded, one on the stretcher and one in the front rearwards facing seat, crewman standing on skid watches the tail as Mick (the pilot) does a towering takeoff, as they clear the roof tops and start to transit, the engine surges with a bang and flames out the exhaust then silence. seeing the flames the crewman thinks they are on fire shouts 'Get her down!' Mick calmly carrying out an engine off replys 'Where else do you think we're going'
On Landing they release the 'casualties' harnesses and vacate the area, Mick walks to the nearest phone and calls Sek Kong tower starting with 'Mayday, Mayday, Mayday'. :8

Norway, ‘81 or ‘82 (the events will lead someone to pin it down), and Sgt Golf along with pilot whose name escapes me, is running in at 10 000’ for a free fall drop over the frozen lake at Bomoen. Jumpers are literally in the door, when a serious sounding abort message comes up. Sgt Golf drags the jumpers back in, shuts door as ordered, and back to Bomoen strip.

Turns out, Simon The Pieman (OC 33) had had a ‘heavy landing’ in a whiteout (the cab was f***ed, but there was no heavy fallout) and help was needed. We set off directly.

The day got worse en route, when we hear that the AAC gazelle (there is a link, I promise) carrying JEngo and a snco groundie to the site really did Cat 5 in in a whiteout. Three bad injuries, as it happens.

Golf aids his driver to the most carefully recced 0/0 landing you’ve ever seen!

Anyhow, we loaded up the AAC non com pilot and headed off for the Norgie hospital. Couple of mins in, the army boy beckons me over. Over the noise, he gives me what- I swear- is brewing into a real deathbed declaration. “My jacket pocket, please, my jacket pocket.” I was wetting myself, and being supportive like in the war films. “You’ll be fine”, says I.

“No, you must take it for me”, says brown job. I stuck my hand in his pocket, and pulled out an envelope, thinking, ****, this is his will for his missus or something.

With his final, but not dying words, he croaks, “You must keep this safe…..It’s the squadron beer fund for up north next week”.

Man deserved a medal for his loyalty! Yes, I handed over the kronks. Never got his name.

CG

Two's In
 

I remember tales of such an event - I was at Linton at the time (mid 90s). Rumour had it that it was the CO in a Mk9 (the Mk9s had just arrived at Dishforth).

As an aside, I do not want to see or even hear of a 12000kg snatch, thanks very much!:uhoh:

Seldomfitforpurpose,

We never changed the batteries on AJs remote collection at those FOBs in NI. I bought a remote control jammer from The Gadget Shop in Belfast! The best fiver I ever spent. He would channel surf and I would turn it on when something decent came on like Oz Aerobics. He always stormed off threatening to jail the RAF bod responsible for batteries and TVs. This then meant we didn't have to watch golf or Star Trek and listen to him pipe-in every five minutes to someone else’s private conversation, "......you think you know, but you don't know", in that God awful 'northern - I know everything' drawl.

Priceless!:ok:


H

helidriver

"in that God awful 'northern - I know everything' drawl"

Hit a nerve there - what part of the world do you come from that has such a wonderful accent:=

"in that God awful 'northern - I know everything' drawl"
Correction -
Should read:
"in his God awful 'northern - I know everything' drawl"
Didn't mean to affend or distract this thread into a north-south debate, and if you know the bloke you'd know exactly what I mean!

Leave it Graham - e's not worf it!:)

If we're cataloguing AJ's "career", could we include the bit where he (allegedly) showed a Reem how to extract an insect from a Gaz pitot tube by, ahem, sucking it out? Allegedly leaving a ring of scorched lip-flesh around the pitot, as Gazelle pitot-heaters are routinely left "on" to get rid of the caption. Allegedly.

Can someone tell me about the loaner RN Jungly (MA) who allegedly tried to slingload Germany ? Or was that the fuel bowser one ?

Nr Fairy
 

Yes I do believe it was the same guy, the HELARM/FARP demo. Good guy but I can't remember his name.