Generic thread
 

Crab starts a thread.

Another crab completely misses the point and tells him to stop wingeing.

Crab re-makes the original point but in an effort to reinforce it, over-eggs the pud slightly.

Pongo tells everybody how long he spends 'boots on' in the sand.

Crab reacts to pongo, thus taking thread way off-subject.

Matelot tells everybody how little room there is on-board.

Ex Herc-mate syas it's not just SH.

Crab says he wasn't just talking about SH.

Yank offers general support (though to which side is unclear).

Pongo spouts off about PT (or lack of it in RAF).

Crab attempts to bring thread back onto topic, highlighting the efforts of all aircrew.

Techy bloke demands that engineers contribution be acknowledged (regardless of original thread subject)...........................................

lmao - Sticky this thread - it will save a lot of posts. :}

What about comfort blanket from stack in stores guarded by plods?

There are no blankets in stores, we have 'just in (out of) time' ordering now. And the plods don't guard anymore, they investigate, hence their raise to the same pay band as techies.:rolleyes:

17 minutes.

I'd like to complain about techies being left until the last line...:}

That's more like it.:ok:

It's cramped on board you know. You crabs don't like it! One set of clothes only for a run ashore. Right, back to my cabin.:}

PS As a matelot who works with the crabs I am confused as to who to support - I know its always a pongo's fault though. And no doubt someone will pick me up for spelling and grammar.

Its irrelevant which side you support, its all the fault of the PTI empire and the obsession with fitness testing, that's why we should all PVR when it becomes possible to do so on JPA (unless a FRI is in the offing) . :E

Well, when I was in.....:)

- Someone then points out that it's all because Tony Blairt is a %?*£.
- Someone else - Actually it's all about George Bush
- 911 is a conspiracy
- WEBF - It's because of Sea Harrier
- Admin Guru - If pilots stopped wearing flying suits in the Mess and realised that bluntyism is the pointy end of the RAF this wouldn't have happened.
- Random Space Cadet - i gotmy oasC board 2mrwo can NE1 help me 2 no waht type of aircrafts is in the raf innit
- BEagle - Everything that's happened since 1957 is sh1t
- Some spotter - I saw an aeroplane over Yorkshire at 1528 yesterday. What type was it and what was it doing?
- Weakly disguised journo - I'm out of area at the mo, but heard about the mess party with the burning piano, nurses, zaps, broken legs, brandy sours, and cork moustaches. Anyone else there who can fill me in with details?
- Moderator. Thread closed.

Monday morning:
- Stn Cdr - You are not permitted to access PPRUNE on or off duty. That is an order.

And noone's mentioned movers.....

..... or made a word play on "utterly utterly useless" ...


..... and we must have:

1. WEBFoot saying we should re-introduce SHARs

2.Jacko saying Jaguars would be quicker to deploy than SHARS

3. And BEags saying it doesn't matter because they are all flown by grammar school educated oiks ......:ok:

and it's all the fault of the Scribblies ...

I take it JPA's been mended?

How come the movers haven't had a kicking yet?

Mods, please stop this thread now. It is really very silly, and has just caused me to spit out coffee all over my monitor. Need I point out the serious safety related consequences should similar reactions be caused to other unsuspecting members innocently reading these posts? Enough, stop it now before tragedy strikes!

BAES are a waste of space.

Eurofighter is shoite.

Oh, look, another book about the Vulcan.

Mine's the best!

Wastelands.

You know movers are just as good as loadmasters if not better. I can do their job, they can't do mine.

So, if wearing civvy shorts and sunglasses while on 2nd standby RS60, do we still have to ignore US CW2s? Can anyone planning to leave ISK in the next 10 minutes please provide the answer, if not too involved with getting the Grob up the stairs into the dining-in night. Please.

Now you are just being silly.

Will you grovel in accepting my opinion, or must I insult you personally, and everybody who works on the aircrft i think you fly but inf act you don't?




uncapiltalised "i" left in so you have a target for an incoherent rant as alternative to reason.

Wiping the tears from my eyes to check my watch, exactly one hour to fill Page 1.

Thunder and blunder you b:mad:d. I got coffee up my nose.

Wibble, wibble f'tang f'tang biscuit-barrell and assorted puerile tripe.

Yours ever,

Samuraimatt

D'you know, I'm really not sure, I am actually starting to see the benefits of gas barbeques. New Labour wasn't such a bad idea was it? Gok Wan, now there's a lovely name. My new car isn't pink, its cerise. Got some tickets for the forthcoming Village People concert. Nowadays, half a pint of Stella is all I can manage. Movers, lovely people, eh.

I've got my Viagra, now where's the muscle relaxant gel ......

&*^%$£!!!? Phew, blimey - what happened there %$^%&*&^??

Gas is still definitely GAY

It's all gone down the pan since our favourite loadie Always Bleating in Wilts went to ground..

..what happened to him anyway?

.... and not forgetting some ginger beer to remind us that::rolleyes:

ABIW? He's lost the power of typing since Stbd beam found the viagra and muscle relaxant! :eek:

I’d like to take you to task over your last statement actually Wader2, I think you’ll find (whilst pushing glasses up nose …) that your statistic is indeed out of date, misleading, totally stupid and should be removed from this forum before offending everyone on the planet. The stats are: 29 posts in 1 hour and 23 minutes if you’d like to check your facts - stupid - idiot - rubbish ……

Beadwindow!

Actual Entries from Maintenance Logs
 

I have an amazing new video as well that I'll post a link to later.
And...have you heard the one about the aircraft carrier and the lighthouse?

Problem: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
Solution: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

Problem: Number three engine missing.
Solution: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

Problem: Evidence of hydraulic leak on right main landing gear.
Solution: Evidence removed.

Problem #1: #2 Propeller seeping prop fluid.
Solution #1: #2 Propeller seepage normal.
Problem #2: #1, #3, and #4 propellers lack normal seepage.

Problem: The autopilot doesn't.
Signed off: IT DOES NOW.

Problem: Something loose in cockpit.
Solution: Something tightened in cockpit.

Problem: DME volume unbelievably loud.
Solution: Volume set to more believable level.

Problem: Dead bugs on windshield.
Solution: Live bugs on order.

Problem: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent.
Solution: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

Problem: IFF inoperative.
Solution: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.

Problem: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
Solution: That's what they're there for.

Anyway, ignoring aircraft, can we talk about ships now?

Would the last one to leave this thread please turn off the lights on your way out...

Priceless!!!
 

Hoodie,
Priceless fella, just priceless.

C130J > C130K :ouch:

Stbd Beam I take exception to that post.

When I was . . .

but then it was always Port Beam or indeed off beam but I think this is now well and truly off thread . . .

anyway I think on average 99% of what you said was made up on the spot.

LEAN is stupid.

No it isn't.

Yes it is.

No it isn't.

Yes it is.

No it isn't.

Yes it is.

No it isn't.

Yes it is.

No it isn't.

Yes it is.

No it isn't.

Ad Nauseum.

JPA is a quantum leap forward in provideing quality HRM to our brave lads and lasses in uniform !
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eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
:bored::bored:

I'd LOVE to sign on to 55..............

The RAF Collection looks pretty good !
http://www.rafcollection.com/