TACEVAL stories
Then there was the day the rioters (encouraged by distaff) lifted the front gates at Binbrook off their hinges. We had suggest wire-locked nuts to secure the gate on the hinges but PSA said it was "impossible". The impossible quickly became "possible".
Also hoax-called the Staish as "Red Hand of Ulster", threatening all sorts of mayhem. Then Di-staff leader asked the Staish for the form to be filled in in the event of a hoax call - long pregnant silence.
One of the di-staff seemed to have access to info on all sorts of IEDs - so we put one under a central heating oil tank. OC Arm Eng (Paul? - became at least a 2*) went through all his procedures and eventually proclaimed it a hoax and shone his torch under the tank. "Bang". Loud expletive! PE cell was our own addition.
Also hoax-called the Staish as "Red Hand of Ulster", threatening all sorts of mayhem. Then Di-staff leader asked the Staish for the form to be filled in in the event of a hoax call - long pregnant silence.
One of the di-staff seemed to have access to info on all sorts of IEDs - so we put one under a central heating oil tank. OC Arm Eng (Paul? - became at least a 2*) went through all his procedures and eventually proclaimed it a hoax and shone his torch under the tank. "Bang". Loud expletive! PE cell was our own addition.
Last edited by Wander00; 6th Aug 2013 at 15:55.
DX Wombat
Just in case you didn't know.
All RAF stations and the pilots wot fly there are described in the press as:-
Top secret, Top Gun base/ hero, Falklands hero, GW 1 hero, GW 2 hero etc.
The fact hat there's usually a chuffing big sign edged in red saying 'RAF ********* ' seems to have blown their 'Top Secret' cover.
All RAF stations and the pilots wot fly there are described in the press as:-
Top secret, Top Gun base/ hero, Falklands hero, GW 1 hero, GW 2 hero etc.
The fact hat there's usually a chuffing big sign edged in red saying 'RAF ********* ' seems to have blown their 'Top Secret' cover.
Last edited by uffington sb; 7th Aug 2013 at 04:37.
I was interested to see that tale of how things went at Brize later in the 80s. It was very possibly the last station to join the UKAIR TACEVAL programme. MOD had been very leery about letting the two transport bases be subjected to the fun and games increasingly happening elsewhere lest schedules and service to the Army and Navy might be interrupted. Eventually permission was granted with, as I recall, caveats about all tasked flights remaining outside any exercise play. Lyneham went first. A couple of local exercises were held at Brize before the hooter first went one evening in late 77/early 78. I don't think the station had any extra kit at all at that stage, and I recall the ensuing 48 hours or so as pretty much of a nonsense. I'm told that things improved, but I have to say that early experience did nothing to endear the system to me.
German Air Force officer, going through Taceval checklist -
'So, can you turn-round a F104?'
Cheery sergeant -
'You get it in, we'll turn it round'
Conversation taking place on Harrier field deployment site, 600ft of tin and a 70ft mexe pad.
wets
'So, can you turn-round a F104?'
Cheery sergeant -
'You get it in, we'll turn it round'
Conversation taking place on Harrier field deployment site, 600ft of tin and a 70ft mexe pad.
wets
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Forgive me … not TACEVAL, but a major Linconshire Real Bomber Station work-up in anticipation. DISTAFF Team Leader (Moi?) injects signal to WOC (Confidential and StaffinConf) to OC Pol&Sy Sqn casting doubts on the validity of the Sy Clearance of Nuclear Stn Cdr.
Sadly I missed the action, which was apparently quite amusing, but the Stn Cdr was out of the exercise with 2 major benefits. [a] OC Ops gets his feet wet, as does SLOps on the other shift, and [b] Big John L***** was released to see see what was going on as an innocent observer.
"At your command, Master"
…………..
I did once threaten the Stn Cdr at a Scottish Fighter station with good golfing facilities, when DISTAFF-ing a ScotADEX, to "take him out" with a sniper if he didn't stop driving around in a shiny black car with pennant flying as a 'free gift' to anyone with hostile intent. He switched to a SWB LandRover
He was the offspring of some famous AM/ACM, IIRC
Sadly I missed the action, which was apparently quite amusing, but the Stn Cdr was out of the exercise with 2 major benefits. [a] OC Ops gets his feet wet, as does SLOps on the other shift, and [b] Big John L***** was released to see see what was going on as an innocent observer.
"At your command, Master"
…………..
I did once threaten the Stn Cdr at a Scottish Fighter station with good golfing facilities, when DISTAFF-ing a ScotADEX, to "take him out" with a sniper if he didn't stop driving around in a shiny black car with pennant flying as a 'free gift' to anyone with hostile intent. He switched to a SWB LandRover
He was the offspring of some famous AM/ACM, IIRC
Last edited by MPN11; 6th Aug 2013 at 16:01.
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
ICM, I think the nonsense really set in with the one-Taceval scenario fits all.
Would St Mawgan have faced the same threat as Kinloss?
Why try and fight a war at Lossie with the Jag OCU, the Strike Buccaneers and the AEW Shacks? What a target rich environment. I suspect that come high tension other airfields would have been pressed in to use.
Wittering was another nonsense as all the aircraft would have deployed to Germany leaving an unmanned and virtually indefensible airfield.
Finningley etc, better to muster all the trainees, categorise them for usefulness and despatch them (for real or on paper) as pick axe handlers or guard commanders or wherever their skills (
) might have been useful. Instead we have a surfeit of personnel who would congregate in the bombproof Seco hut coffee bar as 'all training ceases' in accordance with the war book.
Would St Mawgan have faced the same threat as Kinloss?
Why try and fight a war at Lossie with the Jag OCU, the Strike Buccaneers and the AEW Shacks? What a target rich environment. I suspect that come high tension other airfields would have been pressed in to use.
Wittering was another nonsense as all the aircraft would have deployed to Germany leaving an unmanned and virtually indefensible airfield.
Finningley etc, better to muster all the trainees, categorise them for usefulness and despatch them (for real or on paper) as pick axe handlers or guard commanders or wherever their skills (
) might have been useful. Instead we have a surfeit of personnel who would congregate in the bombproof Seco hut coffee bar as 'all training ceases' in accordance with the war book.
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Very true, Pontius.
It was very silly at times. However, ignoring the 'faux reality' of TACEVAL as applied at different establishments, it did perhaps help people in the RAF realise that they were in a fighting service. I know most did, especially aircrew, but it needed IMO putting places through the mangle to make them realise it was not a peacetime job - ever.
I recall vividly the Part I at HQ 11Gp, where I turned up with all the kit, webbing, water bottle full, etc, etc … to be subsequently bollocked for [owning and] wearing a green combat shirt instead of an everyday blue one.
Or when Brawdy chopped to 11 Gp, and I examined their War Plan and proved on paper that it would take them 5 years [or thereabouts] to implement their sandbagging plan.
It was very silly at times. However, ignoring the 'faux reality' of TACEVAL as applied at different establishments, it did perhaps help people in the RAF realise that they were in a fighting service. I know most did, especially aircrew, but it needed IMO putting places through the mangle to make them realise it was not a peacetime job - ever.
I recall vividly the Part I at HQ 11Gp, where I turned up with all the kit, webbing, water bottle full, etc, etc … to be subsequently bollocked for [owning and] wearing a green combat shirt instead of an everyday blue one.
Or when Brawdy chopped to 11 Gp, and I examined their War Plan and proved on paper that it would take them 5 years [or thereabouts] to implement their sandbagging plan.
Last edited by MPN11; 6th Aug 2013 at 16:09.
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LOA is wonderful
During an execise at Gut I was in Eng Ops with a strange Sq/Ldr Eng sat on a plinth behind me.
He Said to me "Chief, it's the front desks place to make the coffee for the back desk"
To which I repled, "While the Queen is willing to pay me more 'LOA' than a senior officer I am more than willing to make the coffee, sir"
He never asked me to make the coffee again. (I was demob happy)
Brize Norton, third day of Taceval and the nukes have gone off with the rad count building. All the shiny 10 fleet was scrambled due to the 'Black Condition'.
Ten minutes later the Bengo (all senior officers were dead) came up to me and said,
"The aircraft are landing back, send all your boys out to see them in"
To which I replied "Sorry boss but I can't send the lads out as it would be instant death for them, the aircraft will have to wait for the Rad Count to decrease"
He looked very sheepish and went away. Two minutes later he was back with a big smile on his face and said,
"It's OK you can send your boys out as the aircraft have landed at Marham"
My instant reply was
"Well let b****y Marham see them in then!
I had to have a chat with the Sengo when he had been revived from the dead, he told me not to be cruel to Bengos!
He Said to me "Chief, it's the front desks place to make the coffee for the back desk"
To which I repled, "While the Queen is willing to pay me more 'LOA' than a senior officer I am more than willing to make the coffee, sir"
He never asked me to make the coffee again. (I was demob happy)
Brize Norton, third day of Taceval and the nukes have gone off with the rad count building. All the shiny 10 fleet was scrambled due to the 'Black Condition'.
Ten minutes later the Bengo (all senior officers were dead) came up to me and said,
"The aircraft are landing back, send all your boys out to see them in"
To which I replied "Sorry boss but I can't send the lads out as it would be instant death for them, the aircraft will have to wait for the Rad Count to decrease"
He looked very sheepish and went away. Two minutes later he was back with a big smile on his face and said,
"It's OK you can send your boys out as the aircraft have landed at Marham"
My instant reply was
"Well let b****y Marham see them in then!
I had to have a chat with the Sengo when he had been revived from the dead, he told me not to be cruel to Bengos!
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
MPN, indeed. I had that battle with a secret lodger unit at station off the A1. Told them they needed section call out plans and a general call out plan. They were so secure that they only operated 8-5 M-F and relied on MT to bus them to work. They did have a duty officer but no associated call out plan for their people.
Reluctantly they created the general and selective plans and were able to say, when Taceval fever arrived, that they had plans (which they would not have done otherwise).
Reluctantly they created the general and selective plans and were able to say, when Taceval fever arrived, that they had plans (which they would not have done otherwise).
scene, a German AFB.
LB as Taceval Metman, detached from HQRAFG
.
Late on day 1 .......... "right I will now look at your Altermet!"
Altermet nicely dispersed, snug in prepared blast walls, box body, good comms, all present and correct, NBC gear, lovely ............
Thinks ................
What are the wheels on each corner and the tow bar for?
"Ah well, its not a base asset, its a German AF asset, held centrally. We move it sharpish to the base being TACEVALled ...... it arrived an hour ago!"
"So, what about real war then?"
"I guess nobody has an Altermet!"
The British Senior Taceval officer resisted my attempts to submit an honest report
LB as Taceval Metman, detached from HQRAFG
.
Late on day 1 .......... "right I will now look at your Altermet!"
Altermet nicely dispersed, snug in prepared blast walls, box body, good comms, all present and correct, NBC gear, lovely ............
Thinks ................
What are the wheels on each corner and the tow bar for?
"Ah well, its not a base asset, its a German AF asset, held centrally. We move it sharpish to the base being TACEVALled ...... it arrived an hour ago!"
"So, what about real war then?"
"I guess nobody has an Altermet!"
The British Senior Taceval officer resisted my attempts to submit an honest report
Back to Wyton, 51 Sq, late 70's: New game introduced, intruder searching which we were informed meant stripping the intruder down, obviously before the H & S and the PC world we live in now.
Never saw anything before or since (we now search by rolling the clothing into a bunch in your hands), but distaff appeared to find some barking volunteers to act as intruders which meant they were quite happy to be stripped to pants and socks outside the hangar and then we were supposed to have a feel around their nether regions which everyone refused to do even when the intruder pulled a pistol out from between his thighs and 'shot' the guards.
Honington, early 80's 9 Sqn guard force: when they first arrived and before there was the fence built, they guarded their own HAS site until one endex at around 20:00 it was noted that there was a gun missing and it was decided to leave re-checking in the morning, around two in the morning the police found a young man wandering around the airfield wondering where everyone has gone (no radios, phones so he could not contact anyone).
Never saw anything before or since (we now search by rolling the clothing into a bunch in your hands), but distaff appeared to find some barking volunteers to act as intruders which meant they were quite happy to be stripped to pants and socks outside the hangar and then we were supposed to have a feel around their nether regions which everyone refused to do even when the intruder pulled a pistol out from between his thighs and 'shot' the guards.
Honington, early 80's 9 Sqn guard force: when they first arrived and before there was the fence built, they guarded their own HAS site until one endex at around 20:00 it was noted that there was a gun missing and it was decided to leave re-checking in the morning, around two in the morning the police found a young man wandering around the airfield wondering where everyone has gone (no radios, phones so he could not contact anyone).
Amongst the many..............
Was on leave when got a phone call from mate who was Trg Major with a TA regiment in deepest East Anglia - he had been invited to partake in a certain Buccaneer base's TACEVAL as an invading force, and asked me along as an 'adviser'. It then turns out that one of his troopers is also the milkman who does the rounds of H...........n (including messes, Sqns and Ops), so we load up the milkfloat with a protective screen of milk bottles and put the best part of two or three fully armed platoons and a few boxes marked BOMB in the middle. Milkman duly turns up at the guardroom some 2 or 3 hrs after startex and plays the usual belligerent civvie - "do you want this milk or not?" so we are waved on, then totally igmored. After leaving a few IEDs around the bazaars duly storm and capture the OPs Block - in the middle of Stn Cdrs' meeting. TACEVAL team seemed quite amused to find the entire command structure as POWs.
Was on leave when got a phone call from mate who was Trg Major with a TA regiment in deepest East Anglia - he had been invited to partake in a certain Buccaneer base's TACEVAL as an invading force, and asked me along as an 'adviser'. It then turns out that one of his troopers is also the milkman who does the rounds of H...........n (including messes, Sqns and Ops), so we load up the milkfloat with a protective screen of milk bottles and put the best part of two or three fully armed platoons and a few boxes marked BOMB in the middle. Milkman duly turns up at the guardroom some 2 or 3 hrs after startex and plays the usual belligerent civvie - "do you want this milk or not?" so we are waved on, then totally igmored. After leaving a few IEDs around the bazaars duly storm and capture the OPs Block - in the middle of Stn Cdrs' meeting. TACEVAL team seemed quite amused to find the entire command structure as POWs.
Back to Wyton, 51 Sq, late 70's: New game introduced, intruder searching which we were informed meant stripping the intruder down, obviously before the H & S and the PC world we live in now.
Another (male) intruder was strung up on tip toes and attached the wire mesh fence with locking wire around his thumbs....at which point the umpires announced that the point had been well made and we could stop being quite so defensive!
Last edited by BEagle; 6th Aug 2013 at 17:09.
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The scene - RAF Biggin Hill in the midst of a Home Defence Exercise. Coy of Foot Guards are guarding the place.
HM's finest TA hooligans are tasked to get an IED inside the Coy HQ. A corporal aged late 30s who looks late 50s borrows his father's 50/60s Army uniform (father retired as a 3* with significant WW2 service and ribbons). A car dealer member of the sqn supplies and drives a black Granada and the black * plates are made up and fixed in position. The Sqn boss, in real life a bank manager comes as he is as the General's civil servant private secretary wallah carrying a briefcase.
The staff car arrives. Window wound down, "General Bloggs on an informal visit to see how things are going - can he come in and meet the Coy commander?" "Certainly Sir", much bowing and scraping. General is briefed on the ex and introduced to the other ruperts. "Well done chaps, must get on, lots more people to see etc."
Briefcase is left behind in Coy HQ, car departs amidst much saluting.
Coy Cdr most upset to find he and his team are dead 30 mins later.
Another day I'll tell the story of a hot landing at Kenley from a Wokka which wasn't opposed as one of our number stormed down the ramp wielding a running petrol-powered angle-grinder
HM's finest TA hooligans are tasked to get an IED inside the Coy HQ. A corporal aged late 30s who looks late 50s borrows his father's 50/60s Army uniform (father retired as a 3* with significant WW2 service and ribbons). A car dealer member of the sqn supplies and drives a black Granada and the black * plates are made up and fixed in position. The Sqn boss, in real life a bank manager comes as he is as the General's civil servant private secretary wallah carrying a briefcase.
The staff car arrives. Window wound down, "General Bloggs on an informal visit to see how things are going - can he come in and meet the Coy commander?" "Certainly Sir", much bowing and scraping. General is briefed on the ex and introduced to the other ruperts. "Well done chaps, must get on, lots more people to see etc."
Briefcase is left behind in Coy HQ, car departs amidst much saluting.
Coy Cdr most upset to find he and his team are dead 30 mins later.
Another day I'll tell the story of a hot landing at Kenley from a Wokka which wasn't opposed as one of our number stormed down the ramp wielding a running petrol-powered angle-grinder
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Finningley etc, better to muster all the trainees, categorise them for usefulness and despatch them (for real or on paper)
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ICM, I think the nonsense really set in with the one-Taceval scenario fits all.
As for the poor intruders, Odiham stripped theirs off and threw them outdoors into the prisoners square in the Guardroom....
I also remember some poor sod lying down spread eagled at the main gate on a freezing winters night in a deep puddle with ice on the surface..
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Wittering, Late 80's (Albacete time- ish)
Station exercise early o'clock , Monday morning.
We open MSF and brew up , as we are officially in Norway/Denmark/ Germany and do not play locally.
After about an hour Saturdays And Sundays appear and tell us that we are all dead / being questioned.
They spat the dummy out all the way across the crew room when we informed them that we were 'deployed' and not playing.
They had broken in late on Friday night and spent the weekend high up in the racking amongst the smelly damp cam nets.
After a short,loud,shouty conversation amongst themselves, we were informed that we were not to contact anyone when they left.
A quick 'long distance' call had the mobile guard force on site and the first gun battle of the day.
Later on in the day , we had a phone call asking us to turn down the boom box in the hangar as no one could hear the tannoy - great acoustics!
If I remember correctly, the Northolt war had some memorable moments.
Didn't the SYO give a lift to some intruders to the tower.
And there was that memorable announcement that all guards would be armed with a pick axe handle and a WRAF!
Station exercise early o'clock , Monday morning.
We open MSF and brew up , as we are officially in Norway/Denmark/ Germany and do not play locally.
After about an hour Saturdays And Sundays appear and tell us that we are all dead / being questioned.
They spat the dummy out all the way across the crew room when we informed them that we were 'deployed' and not playing.
They had broken in late on Friday night and spent the weekend high up in the racking amongst the smelly damp cam nets.
After a short,loud,shouty conversation amongst themselves, we were informed that we were not to contact anyone when they left.
A quick 'long distance' call had the mobile guard force on site and the first gun battle of the day.
Later on in the day , we had a phone call asking us to turn down the boom box in the hangar as no one could hear the tannoy - great acoustics!
If I remember correctly, the Northolt war had some memorable moments.
Didn't the SYO give a lift to some intruders to the tower.
And there was that memorable announcement that all guards would be armed with a pick axe handle and a WRAF!
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Couple of stories here remind me of happy times at '70s Laarbruch.
FLM's had discovered that modified German fireworks were very effective against intruder forces. The equivalent to the penny banger (1Dm) was string wound which concentrated the explosion. Adding to this by wire winding with locking wire and adding a ball of double bond - 2 part epoxy metal substitute - you had very effective hand grenade. One was tested by igniting in an ammo box and everyone retiring from the empty HAS. There were no remains of ammo box, double bond, or banger of any discernible size. As someone once (nearly) said "I don't know about the enemy but FLM's frighten the life out of me". Glad they were on my side.
You could always tell when Endex was due as doughnuts were delivered with lunch. Until Taceval team had them delivered on day 3 of a 4 day exercise. Those guys knew how to hit where it hurts.
FLM's had discovered that modified German fireworks were very effective against intruder forces. The equivalent to the penny banger (1Dm) was string wound which concentrated the explosion. Adding to this by wire winding with locking wire and adding a ball of double bond - 2 part epoxy metal substitute - you had very effective hand grenade. One was tested by igniting in an ammo box and everyone retiring from the empty HAS. There were no remains of ammo box, double bond, or banger of any discernible size. As someone once (nearly) said "I don't know about the enemy but FLM's frighten the life out of me". Glad they were on my side.
You could always tell when Endex was due as doughnuts were delivered with lunch. Until Taceval team had them delivered on day 3 of a 4 day exercise. Those guys knew how to hit where it hurts.
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My 1250 had my height on as 5 foot 5 3/4 inches.... It was a regular query why? to which I used to answer that it might just be 3/4 of an inch to you, but as a short un it was important to me.......
Gawd knows how you would judge it by looking at one
Gawd knows how you would judge it by looking at one