RAF - Apocryphal Stories
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RAF - Apocryphal Stories
Has anyone come across RAF stories which, while containing an element of truth, have been so embroidered over the years that they have become little more than amusing yarns? This one is well known in several versions. It concerns a Flt Bloggs who, aspiring to a General List PC, has been summoned to Group HQ to face the final hurdle; an interview with the AOC.
Bloggs arrived at the AOC's outer office in good time. The ADC looked him up and down and was admiring his immaculate turnout when he spotted the SD cap. It was an old beaten up specimen that had been kicked around in the back of the aircraft for too long. "You can't go in wearing THAT", he said, horrified. "The AOC is a stickler for this sort of thing. What to do. The ADC had a bright idea. "You can borrow mine", he said and handed over his smart new Bates model. But it was two sizes too big and came down over Blogg's ears. He looked like a Benny Hill character. "I Know", said the ADC. We'll roll up this newspaper to make an inner hat band that will reduce the size. This brilliant piece of improvisation was quickly accomplished and the hat fitted perfectly.
At Last Bloggs was summoned before the great man. He marched into a large stately office that overlooked the grounds (think Bentley Priory) and, when invited to do so, sat down with the hat on his knees. It all seemed to go well but unbeknown to Bloggs, during the course of the interview, the newspaper liner fell to the floor. After some 20 minutes the AOC ended the interview. "That will be all", he said curtly and took up his pen to start his report. Bloggs stood up and replaced the hat. But he couldn't see a thing. Determined to bluff it out he saluted smartly and, relying on memory, marched towards the exit door, opened it then closed it quietly behind him. Greatly relieved he removed the hat to find himself in the broom cupboard. And there he remained, afraid to make the slightest noise, until the AOC went to lunch.
Bloggs arrived at the AOC's outer office in good time. The ADC looked him up and down and was admiring his immaculate turnout when he spotted the SD cap. It was an old beaten up specimen that had been kicked around in the back of the aircraft for too long. "You can't go in wearing THAT", he said, horrified. "The AOC is a stickler for this sort of thing. What to do. The ADC had a bright idea. "You can borrow mine", he said and handed over his smart new Bates model. But it was two sizes too big and came down over Blogg's ears. He looked like a Benny Hill character. "I Know", said the ADC. We'll roll up this newspaper to make an inner hat band that will reduce the size. This brilliant piece of improvisation was quickly accomplished and the hat fitted perfectly.
At Last Bloggs was summoned before the great man. He marched into a large stately office that overlooked the grounds (think Bentley Priory) and, when invited to do so, sat down with the hat on his knees. It all seemed to go well but unbeknown to Bloggs, during the course of the interview, the newspaper liner fell to the floor. After some 20 minutes the AOC ended the interview. "That will be all", he said curtly and took up his pen to start his report. Bloggs stood up and replaced the hat. But he couldn't see a thing. Determined to bluff it out he saluted smartly and, relying on memory, marched towards the exit door, opened it then closed it quietly behind him. Greatly relieved he removed the hat to find himself in the broom cupboard. And there he remained, afraid to make the slightest noise, until the AOC went to lunch.
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stories
A loing time ago I was waiting for take off at Binbrook when one of those death tube things roared away. Half way down the launch track there was lots of smoke and a spit of flame, the take off continued.
Once airborne the boy said, Pan seagull down the engine shut it down turning downwind to land
The girl said runways all yours the services are on the way
We watched the boy turn down wind the gear came down with some flap and it all looked ok but he was obviously busy, the lightning had some quirks in the systems on one engine
She said the engineers are asking which one was it
He replied all the seagulls look the same to me
Once airborne the boy said, Pan seagull down the engine shut it down turning downwind to land
The girl said runways all yours the services are on the way
We watched the boy turn down wind the gear came down with some flap and it all looked ok but he was obviously busy, the lightning had some quirks in the systems on one engine
She said the engineers are asking which one was it
He replied all the seagulls look the same to me
