Military aviation quotes...
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Maybe this thread should be renamed "Apocryphal Now"? Still, never one to let truth get in the way of a good story....
Jim Davidson, on being strapped into a T4 at Gutersloh during the making of a 'Christmas' special (sometime in september), was told by the serious-sounding pilot "Jim, this is really important. If you miss me saying Eject, Eject, then it says FOLLOW ME on the soles of my boots". (I know, similar to an earlier quote, but this one is on video somewhere).
Pax being briefed for a famil around HK in a Scout asked how he would know if the engine DID fail. Was told, in measured and reassuring tones, that it would go "very quiet behind you, and very noisy in front..."
Of course, when one completed a Scout conversion (I never did) allegedly one put a Green Endorsement in the log book and left the date blank.
In slightly worse taste - fuel stop at Koksijde, and one of the crews noticed a sign over the door to the Ops room, which was in Flemish. However, the words 'Herald of Free Enterprise' stood out. He asked one of his hosts if the sign commemorated the excellent work carried out by SAR crews from the base on that fateful night. No, he was told, the sign says "This is not the Herald of Free Enterprise, so shut the f%&*ing door!"
Jim Davidson, on being strapped into a T4 at Gutersloh during the making of a 'Christmas' special (sometime in september), was told by the serious-sounding pilot "Jim, this is really important. If you miss me saying Eject, Eject, then it says FOLLOW ME on the soles of my boots". (I know, similar to an earlier quote, but this one is on video somewhere).
Pax being briefed for a famil around HK in a Scout asked how he would know if the engine DID fail. Was told, in measured and reassuring tones, that it would go "very quiet behind you, and very noisy in front..."
Of course, when one completed a Scout conversion (I never did) allegedly one put a Green Endorsement in the log book and left the date blank.
In slightly worse taste - fuel stop at Koksijde, and one of the crews noticed a sign over the door to the Ops room, which was in Flemish. However, the words 'Herald of Free Enterprise' stood out. He asked one of his hosts if the sign commemorated the excellent work carried out by SAR crews from the base on that fateful night. No, he was told, the sign says "This is not the Herald of Free Enterprise, so shut the f%&*ing door!"
I am a figment of my own imagination
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After a particularly hectic evening at Linton followed by a spectacular run ashore the student was given a fanstop after TO first sortie off in the morning on the way to Dishforth. His patter was rapid and included ignition off and groundflight to ground as well as the selection of a field. The instructor then commented that he would have the safty pannel off with his elbow if he wasn't careful and could he now go round please. There was a horrible silence and much frantic scrambling.
They did make it... just!
They did make it... just!
Downwind.ML,
The phrase "There's always bloody something" has actually been the unoffical motto of IX Sqn groundcrew since WWII. The words form part of the unoffical sqn crest, which features the sqn bat clutching the bomb with which IX Sqn sank the Tirpitz.
The IX Sqn Association publishes an annual magazine which features the unoffical crest/motto on its front cover.
The phrase "There's always bloody something" has actually been the unoffical motto of IX Sqn groundcrew since WWII. The words form part of the unoffical sqn crest, which features the sqn bat clutching the bomb with which IX Sqn sank the Tirpitz.
The IX Sqn Association publishes an annual magazine which features the unoffical crest/motto on its front cover.
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Without risking another arguement on this subject (It wasnt sunk anyway because it wasnt completely submerged, it was merely capsized <img src="wink.gif" border="0"> )
Which squadron currently has the bulkhead??
Which squadron currently has the bulkhead??
Ecce Homo! Loquitur...
I seem to remember the Gunston ATC tape had the classic:
"The Captain is always the last to leave the aircraft. If I pass you on the way to the door you automatically assume the post of Captain"
"The Captain is always the last to leave the aircraft. If I pass you on the way to the door you automatically assume the post of Captain"
Aaah - this ba££$ about 'Who sunk the Tirpitz' is all very well - but everyone surely accepts that it was 35 Sqn who caused the ship such damage in the first place that they left it to rather more junior squadrons to complete the act.......
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Mid 70's - A steely eyed FJ [ex Xv Buccs] Wg Cdr [later AVM methinks], on his career making tour with the largest UAS, was heard to call on his arrival run and break in his Scot Aviation Bulldog
"Lima06 finals 3 greens"
Many dull stoods spent many a week looking for the secret 'instructor only' undercarraige selector lever. We concluded in the end that only one aircraft was ever modified..... Some of those guys went on to be trained by him at TTTE !
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[ 06 January 2002: Message edited by: Reheat On ]</p>
"Lima06 finals 3 greens"
Many dull stoods spent many a week looking for the secret 'instructor only' undercarraige selector lever. We concluded in the end that only one aircraft was ever modified..... Some of those guys went on to be trained by him at TTTE !
<img src="wink.gif" border="0">
[ 06 January 2002: Message edited by: Reheat On ]</p>
Just a numbered other
My next-door neighbour in the 70s, a splendid old boy, retired squabbling bleeder from between the wars used to tell a (probably apochrophal) tale about his days on the North-West frontier in (I think) Westland Wapitis.
These things had a fuel tank in the upper wing which fed the engine by gravity, but which in turn was fed from a larger fuselage tank by the gunner, who's job it was to hand pump fuel into the wing at intervals.
Bill was chuntering along over the dessert, when the engine faltered and died. In to the voice tube he yelled 'Pump, pump!' Gunner duly Jumps. Now with no chance of relighting the engine, Bill glides down and lands next to his silk gathering chum. 'I said pump, not jump you c**t, now get in and pump!'
He was my referee for entry to the RN, and what a bloke to have on your side!
These things had a fuel tank in the upper wing which fed the engine by gravity, but which in turn was fed from a larger fuselage tank by the gunner, who's job it was to hand pump fuel into the wing at intervals.
Bill was chuntering along over the dessert, when the engine faltered and died. In to the voice tube he yelled 'Pump, pump!' Gunner duly Jumps. Now with no chance of relighting the engine, Bill glides down and lands next to his silk gathering chum. 'I said pump, not jump you c**t, now get in and pump!'
He was my referee for entry to the RN, and what a bloke to have on your side!
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How do they know that the one destined for Hendon is not, in fact, a cunning relica and that the real one is safely tucked up in someone's garage?
<img src="wink.gif" border="0">
<img src="wink.gif" border="0">
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With (not many) apologies to 'Plug', doing his first solo in the Bulldog:
ATC: Lima 237 say POB
L237: Er, zero POB
ATC: Ah, just confirm at least One POB???!!
Needless to say 'Plug' flies hundreds of 'pax'
And an imortal line from the film 'Crimson Tide'
'We're here to defend democracy, not to practice it!'
ATC: Lima 237 say POB
L237: Er, zero POB
ATC: Ah, just confirm at least One POB???!!
Needless to say 'Plug' flies hundreds of 'pax'
And an imortal line from the film 'Crimson Tide'
'We're here to defend democracy, not to practice it!'