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Bird Flu

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Old 5th Apr 2006, 21:10
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Bird Flu

Bird flu found in Scotland!

Does this mean we will have to come to the rescue of DEFRA as we did with MAFF???

Do we now have the facilities available to deal with a mass cull???



D
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Old 5th Apr 2006, 21:28
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This just in

Tweety Dead of Bird Flu



Warner Brothers' cartoon character Tweety Bird has been the latest death from the mysterious bird flu. Tweety was one of the first Americans and the biggest name star to contract and die due to the illness.

Bugs Bunny, long the leader and most famous of the Warner Brothers group of cartoon stars, issued a statement to the press. "When I went to the hospital to visit before he passed away, I grabbed the guy coming out of the room and asked him "What's up, Doc!" He told me that our little buddy just wasn't going to make it. I'll really miss the little guy. We'll have to find someone else willing to work with Sylvester. Tweety was the only one of us who didn't mind getting spit on."

"Thufferin Thucatash," said former co-star Sylvester the Cat. "He'th gonna be all infected now, tho I gueth I can't eat the corpth."
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Old 5th Apr 2006, 21:41
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Most 'Bird experts' are agreed that when birds get sick, they don't fly.... Kinda makes you wonder what's going on with these scare stories doesn't it?
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Old 6th Apr 2006, 00:15
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"Keep 'em scared, keep 'em voting (c)"

- Copyright of the Labor Party Policy (a subsidiary of Wacky George's Christian Way, Democracy Our Way, whether you like it or not)
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Old 6th Apr 2006, 13:23
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Originally Posted by dantura
Bird flu found in Scotland!

Does this mean we will have to come to the rescue of DEFRA as we did with MAFF???

Do we now have the facilities available to deal with a mass cull???



D
Sounds like a job for the apache's to me

seriously I hope the gov does'nt cock things up as they did with foot & mouth
that was a total disaster
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Old 6th Apr 2006, 14:06
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Don't know what everyone is worried about, us blokes have survived 'Man-Flu' for years. Just cause there is a strain that targets women, everyone starts to pay attention, typical positive discrimination
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Old 6th Apr 2006, 17:57
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Sounds like a useful 'News Management' story to me
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Old 6th Apr 2006, 21:17
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Yesterday I was trying to reverse into a parking slot and I found I couldn't. Then I got upset about it and had a cry. Do I have bird flu?
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Old 6th Apr 2006, 21:42
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Bird flu doesn't worry me, the antibodies from Mad Cow Disease is killing the HN51 bugs..
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Old 7th Apr 2006, 08:00
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Maxburner - I think you are pregnant....
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Old 7th Apr 2006, 08:45
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The cure is here !
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Old 7th Apr 2006, 08:59
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UK bird makes Spontaneous recovery from Avian Flu?

UK bird makes Spontaneous recovery from Avian Flu?

The editor of the Daily Telegraph got a tip off that a budgerigar in Epsom caught bird flu, but then recovered.

This was obviously quite a story, so he despatched his best investigative reporter to find out more.

The reporter went to the house and knocked on the door, which was answered by an elderly lady.

"Good morning madam," said the reporter. "I'm terribly sorry to disturb you. I'm from the Daily Telegraph, and I understand that you have a bird that caught bird flu, but which then made a complete recovery."

"That's right." the woman confirmed. "Won't you come in?"

Inside the house, the reporter asked whether he might see the bird. He was ushered into the immaculate front room, where the budgie sat in its cage, clearly fit and well.

"Would you mind if my photographer took a picture?" he asked, and on being given permission, called the photographer - who naturally came to the back door, knowing his place.

Once suitable pictures had been taken, the reporter asked the owner whether he might interview the bird.

The owner was slightly puzzled by such a request, but granted her permission.

The reporter stepped up to the cage and began:

"Good morning. I'm from the Daily Telegraph. I'm terribly sorry to disturb you during your convalescence, but you'll understand that your remarkable recovery will be of tremendous interest to our readers. I wonder whether you might tell us what happened?"

The budgie looked straight at the reporter and blinked slowly.

"I'd like to help you, mate," he said "but I'm afraid that I only talk to the Mirror."
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Old 7th Apr 2006, 13:17
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Jacko,

Your subscription to PPRuNe has just been cancelled. Please log off now and thrash yourself to death with a copy of your own journal!

FW
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Old 7th Apr 2006, 15:32
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Don't suppose migrating swans land in Trafalgar Square often do they? Shame, darned pigeons!
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Old 7th Apr 2006, 15:40
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which tastes better?

Golden Eagle or Swan? You always wondered so now is your chance.
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Old 7th Apr 2006, 16:52
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The yanks are **** scared of bird flu. Apparently Dubya has just authorised the bombing of the Canary Islands
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