Old NonPC Videos
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Old NonPC Videos
Can anyone remember some of those fantastic NonPC training videos from yesteryear?
Dr FOD and Miss Wayward Body
The Man from LOX
To name a couple...... any other classics?
TBK
Dr FOD and Miss Wayward Body
The Man from LOX
To name a couple...... any other classics?
TBK
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Saw a good'n a few years ago much to the amusement of all who watched. It was a 1983ish army training video on codes of conduct set in a post apocolyptic Germany. Two British squaddies come across (easy..not that sort of film) a German lady in a barn and make moves to defile ths poor lady.
Enter young British officer, pistol in hand, lip in stiff-upper position, Best of British accent. He busts through the door and screams some sense back into the oiks. They wipe snot from there noses and amble out of the barn to hunt for Ivan. Good old Tommy Atkins!
My dad remembered one from when he was a lad circa early 60s - a film was played in his school assembly by an army recruiting team. It involved a team of British soldiers in some arse of the Empire ordering the natives around in some mock counter-insurgency. One immigrant lad in the assembly hall stood up shouting "why are you doing that to my people?" and had a right old go at the army recruiters. oops!
Enter young British officer, pistol in hand, lip in stiff-upper position, Best of British accent. He busts through the door and screams some sense back into the oiks. They wipe snot from there noses and amble out of the barn to hunt for Ivan. Good old Tommy Atkins!
My dad remembered one from when he was a lad circa early 60s - a film was played in his school assembly by an army recruiting team. It involved a team of British soldiers in some arse of the Empire ordering the natives around in some mock counter-insurgency. One immigrant lad in the assembly hall stood up shouting "why are you doing that to my people?" and had a right old go at the army recruiters. oops!
Dr FOD - who was the lovely girl in the tight cheesecloth blouse who was obviously feeling rather chilly? 
Aaarrgh-the Cranwell bromide is wearing off!
Aaarrgh-the Cranwell bromide is wearing off!
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The Royal Navy did some of the best ones. My particualr favourite was the chap playing 'Hangar Pilots' in an armed Sea Vixen who fired a salvo of rockets across the flight deck into the sea. I bet they had lots of fun shooting that film - there were no digital special effects in those days, it were the real thing.
The most politically incorrect training films I was ever treated to were those for NBC team members back in the 60's. If the civilian population had ever seen how we intended to use the survivors of a nuclear attack we'd have been in really big trouble. Of course we thought it was all a big joke - even if the MOD big-wigs didn't realise that there would be no survivors at any of the Bomber Command airfields, we certainly knew it was a complete waste of time training us for the aftermath.
The most politically incorrect training films I was ever treated to were those for NBC team members back in the 60's. If the civilian population had ever seen how we intended to use the survivors of a nuclear attack we'd have been in really big trouble. Of course we thought it was all a big joke - even if the MOD big-wigs didn't realise that there would be no survivors at any of the Bomber Command airfields, we certainly knew it was a complete waste of time training us for the aftermath.
One of the best flight safety films was "Frustration" - about a couple of mates ferrying a Javelin out to the Far East. It was considered to be a tedious, frustrating trip - yet most people these days would think it a very enjoyable one!
A shame that it was never transferred to videotape.
The old 'reds under the bed' security films were hilariously awful!
A shame that it was never transferred to videotape.
The old 'reds under the bed' security films were hilariously awful!
Gentleman Aviator
Aaarrgh-the Cranwell bromide is wearing off!
...but back to the thread: there was even a security vid about some airship's WRAF ADC sh@gging a Russian!!
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This topic prompted me to search for sources of old training films on the web. The Imperial War Museum turned up a few in amongst the newsreel footage it holds. Unfortunately not for sale, although groups can organise visits to view.
One film of current interest was a 1965 recruiting film for Porton Down 'Guinea Pigs'.
A link: http://www.iwmcollections.org.uk/qryFilm.asp
One film of current interest was a 1965 recruiting film for Porton Down 'Guinea Pigs'.
A link: http://www.iwmcollections.org.uk/qryFilm.asp
We were treated to 'Dr. Fod and Miss Wayward Body' in Aust too, a reasonable number of years ago now - I suppose it's been relegated to the Shame Vault now, more's the pity.
Some of the musings of our Aviation Medicine lecturer have stayed with me too, particularly the part where he was pointing out the similarities between sweat and the secretions from girlies' nether regions (obviously there must have been a good teaching point to be gained from this), suggesting that it was just as good to lick our girlfriends' armpits as go for anything more ambitious...hmmm.
Some of the musings of our Aviation Medicine lecturer have stayed with me too, particularly the part where he was pointing out the similarities between sweat and the secretions from girlies' nether regions (obviously there must have been a good teaching point to be gained from this), suggesting that it was just as good to lick our girlfriends' armpits as go for anything more ambitious...hmmm.
Your AvMed sessions were obviously a lot more fun than ours!
Hyperventilation vs. Hypoxia on those pink and yellow flip-up OHP slides, 2 mins at 30 mm Hg between lessons, 'Mickey Mouse in Mathemagicland' whilst waiting to go into the chamber for a 25-45K RD.....
And the most expensive coffee in the universe in the AMTC crewroom.
It lost a lot of its historic charm when it moved down to Henlow- and a good Ruddles and vindaloo pull-through prior to chamber runs has probably become non-PC on the grounds that the smell harrasses the quack!
Hyperventilation vs. Hypoxia on those pink and yellow flip-up OHP slides, 2 mins at 30 mm Hg between lessons, 'Mickey Mouse in Mathemagicland' whilst waiting to go into the chamber for a 25-45K RD.....
And the most expensive coffee in the universe in the AMTC crewroom.
It lost a lot of its historic charm when it moved down to Henlow- and a good Ruddles and vindaloo pull-through prior to chamber runs has probably become non-PC on the grounds that the smell harrasses the quack!
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Agree Beags
The atmosphere in the hall was worse than in the tube!
We wanted to stay in - but they had to rush through the next batch!
Hold your breath, Trust a few, Always paddle your own cnaoe!
The atmosphere in the hall was worse than in the tube!
We wanted to stay in - but they had to rush through the next batch!
Hold your breath, Trust a few, Always paddle your own cnaoe!
Who was the snake that would appear from left open filing cabinets etc?
He made me laugh
The alcohol abuse one when the young airman transforms from newly posted in to Germany Mr Keen, to Mr Alcoholic was not
He made me laugh
The alcohol abuse one when the young airman transforms from newly posted in to Germany Mr Keen, to Mr Alcoholic was not
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Wasn't there a safety film based on a real event of a Phantom taking off (albeit brifely) without the wing locks securely in? If memory serves, Trevor Eve played the unfortunate pilot...
PPatRoN
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Not a training film, and not terribly amusing either, but if you go here and enter 1774 in the "Canister Number" box, then click "Go", you'll get access to a brief 1930 Pathé film of Air Chief Marshal Sir John Salmond inspecting Cranwell cadets.
Preview quality is free. You can also buy a presentation quality copy (to incorporate into a Powerpoint briefing, say).
Of course, if you choose to make it amusing by dubbing on your soundtrack, well...
adr
Preview quality is free. You can also buy a presentation quality copy (to incorporate into a Powerpoint briefing, say).
Of course, if you choose to make it amusing by dubbing on your soundtrack, well...
adr
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Message for Skeleton
Skeleton - Was the spying snake not called 'Hissing Sid' warning you about leaving security furniture open and classified docs lying about when knocking off?
Snakes are Bald. But not Fat. So they are half great
Snakes are Bald. But not Fat. So they are half great
Avoid imitations
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David Jason did one about cold weather flying clothing. Can't remember too much about it though after all that expensive AMTC coffee that Beagle reminded me of.
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Jump Jump John !
Anyone see the film for flying in AEF flights in Chippie?
Early 80's watch safety film before allowed in Chippie for AEF flight at Finningley. Includes how to evacuate aircraft in case of emergency.
Seem to remember it involved in the event of an emergency the pilot sliding canopy back and saying "Jump Jump John" and cheery cadet saying "Jump Jump Sir" then climbing out onto wing (striken aircraft still flying straight and level!!) before departing aircraft.
Anyone see the film for flying in AEF flights in Chippie?
Early 80's watch safety film before allowed in Chippie for AEF flight at Finningley. Includes how to evacuate aircraft in case of emergency.
Seem to remember it involved in the event of an emergency the pilot sliding canopy back and saying "Jump Jump John" and cheery cadet saying "Jump Jump Sir" then climbing out onto wing (striken aircraft still flying straight and level!!) before departing aircraft.
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The Harrier film with Richard O'Sullivan in was 'Frustration' too. But he didn't leave his seat pan pin in. He taxied out on to the active without clearance after being distracted by such things as the blanket stacker dropping the keys to stores in the airmans' mess and the stewardess in the Os' mess not giving Richard his eggs and bacon on time! The Harrier film with the seat pan pin was set in Belize with some guy that used to be in Emmerdale Farm. The Phantom taking off without the wing locks engaged may well have had Trevor Eve as the Pilot. But more impressively to me at the time, the Chief Tech was played by the guy who used to be Mr Bronson in Grange Hill! In the past decade RN films have I think, been much better just like 'Flightdeck' as a flight safety mag. But the SSKC film that made the most impact on a young and naive Circle Kay as Swinderby was the black and white one of the squaddies going out to Singapore on a Britannia and catching a 'social' disease to bring back to loved ones in dear old Blighty. It had lots of very graphic photos at the end shown by a very sweaty MO.