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The really really boring and totaly pointless snippets of information thread

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The really really boring and totaly pointless snippets of information thread

Old 22nd Nov 2003, 00:18
  #3521 (permalink)  

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Last time I checked... Plant, Page, Jones & Bonham weren't that luvvie.....
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 00:19
  #3522 (permalink)  

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Wine is fine, but whiskey's quicker
Suicide is slow with liquer
Take a bottle, drown your sorrows
Then it floods away tomorrows
Away tomorrows



Ozzy
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 00:22
  #3523 (permalink)  
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She walks in beauty like the night
Discarding her clothes in the plastic flowers
Pornographic and tragic in black and white
My Marilyn come to my slum for an hour


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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 00:23
  #3524 (permalink)  

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I love to drink Martinis
Two at the very most
Three I'm under the table
Four I'm under the host.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 00:27
  #3525 (permalink)  
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Was SG's post lyrics, prose or plain ol' bog standard facts about her?




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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 00:37
  #3526 (permalink)  

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I do like Martinis, topcat, but credit for the ditty must go to Dorothy Parker. What relation it bears to my own life I am not at liberty to say.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 01:51
  #3527 (permalink)  
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Out of interest, Mr Draper, where did you pick up that one about the dream?
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 02:05
  #3528 (permalink)  
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Err, funny you should say that Mr D, I cannot remember, just one thats been in me head since sproghood,one actually tried googling it once and got no returns,one is more skillfull at the googling art now so will give it another whirl.

Incidently, Mr Bush had Fish n Chips and mushy peas,forris dinner, or steepy peas as they are more correctly called up here.
Personely, mushy/steepy peas is not a dish one is fond of.


Last edited by tony draper; 22nd Nov 2003 at 02:26.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 02:27
  #3529 (permalink)  

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Love mushy peas mmmmmmmmm ...
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 02:57
  #3530 (permalink)  
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That explains it, Mr Draper. I have similar problems with the mists of time. Perhaps this time I can refresh your memory, without recourse to Google.

How about this:

I dreamd I saw a battle fought
Beyond the Isle o' Skye,
When lo, a dead man wan the field,
And I thought that man was I.

My wound is deep, I fain wad sleep,
Nae mair I’ll fighting see;
Gae lay me in the breakan bush
That grows on yonder lee.

But tell na ane of my brave men
That I lye bleeding wan,
But let the name of Douglas still
Be shouted in the van.

There is more, of course. See The Battle of Otterburn, Child’s English and Scottish Ballads, Harraps, 1904.

It comes from your part of the world. The whole business began with a tourist outing by the Douglas to Newe Castell. When they got there “The Skottes” cried:

Syr Hary Perssy, and thou byste within,
Come to the fylde and fyght.

Which he did. After Douglas was killed, the Scots hid his body under the briar bush, as ordered. The Scots Sir Hugh Montgomery then engaged Sir Harry Percy in hand to hand combat.

They swakked their swords till sair they swat
And the blood ran down like rain.

Sir Hugh called on Sir Harry to yield. Well, I’d like to, said Sir Harry in effect, but not to a “loun like thee”.

Thou shalt not yield to knave nor loun,
Nor shalt thou yield to me;
But yield thee to the breaken bush
That grows on yonder lee.

I will not yield to bush or brier
Nor will I yield to thee;
But I will yield to Lord Douglas,
Or Sir Hugh Montgomery.

When Piercy knew it was Sir Hugh,
He fell low on his knee,
But soon he raisd him up again,
Wi’ mickle courtesy.

Last edited by Davaar; 22nd Nov 2003 at 03:09.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 03:17
  #3531 (permalink)  
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Ah , thank you Mr D that certainly seems to be it,or at least derived from that work, funny thing I almost said in my post I thought it had something to do with Scotland,
Steeped in blood and violence is the Border region, 500 years of mayhem that makes the wild west look very weedy indeed.
I have a fine book on the Moss Troopers and Border Rievers, full of the ballards and poetry of the time, sods law I cannot I cannot lay my hands on it right now.

Aha!! the web triumphs again, posed the question on another website and recieved a swift answer, apparently the lines are spoken in the prologe to the Movie "The Man Who Never Was".
Must have been there I heard them, but I have quoted them wrongly.

http://www.shepherd-express.com/shep...day/focus.html

Last edited by tony draper; 22nd Nov 2003 at 05:41.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 03:28
  #3532 (permalink)  
 
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A poem for the autumn

When I awoke this morning, when all good things are born
A Robin perched upon the sill, to greet the coming dawn
‘Twas gay and young and fragile, and sweetly did it sing
And thoughts of joy and happiness into my heart did bring
And as I listened to the Robin’s song I leant across the bed
I gently closed the window and crushed it’s fecking head.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 04:37
  #3533 (permalink)  
 
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Location: at the edge of nowhere, dogleg England
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Right Now!

Its 3.02 AM here.

Apart from this blasted dog in the street, I seem to be the only person awake in the area.

Its a pity. I like dogs.

Except *that* one.

And now another from far away is replying. @#$%

I've slipped the surly bonds of earth,
And danced the skies on laughte-silvered wings.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 04:39
  #3534 (permalink)  
 
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Thanks for the poem singaporegirl, unfortunately I meant number 2s really and not that. I suppose I should have made it clearer, but I didn't want to get umm... too deep into it.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 06:17
  #3535 (permalink)  

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The common hippopotamus
Doesn't make a lot of fuss.
In water it is closeted
When faeces are deposited.
To swim in shit is not good taste
(At least it isn't nuclear waste)
And leaves a tide mark round its neck
Do hippos mind that? Do they ****.

I hope that is scatological enough for you, Mr Spork. When does your treatment start?
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 06:23
  #3536 (permalink)  
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Speaking of Chemists and cough bottles, we had a famed Apothecary in Newcastle called Dirty Dick, how he came by the name one shall not speculate,for he is gone now these thirty years alas
Dirty Dick was famed for his nostrums, from the Scotish Borders down to the wastes of Yorkshire,.people suffering from every affliction known to man would travel miles just for a consultation wih Dirty Dick, they would enter Dirty Dicks Emporium groaning and clutching at their bellies,or limping and wincing from pain, else coughing like one of the Bronte sisters, Dick would cast his cunning eyes over them retreat to his mortar pestles bottles and jars and return with a medication tailored just for them,said folks would exit Dicks shop flinging aside crutches trusses glass eyes and such, and run skipping and whistling down the street pausing only to pat small children and dogs on the head., or else kick a ball around with the local urchins
.Local GPs became expert at filling in the Times Crossword and constructing things from paper clips, Hospital [email protected] depts had chess tournaments that went on for weeks, and bandaging oneself with a hand tied behind the back competitions, became a popular sport among A @ E staff , so seldom were their services required, all due to Dirty Dick.
On grows cynical with age but one has begun to suspect that Dirty Dick slipped ingredients that nowadays would be classed as illegal substances into all his cures,
Never the less, ask anybody over forty in Newcastle about Dirty Dick and they will tell you the same, for Draper is not lying , Dirty Dick was a Apothecatarial wonder of his age,
Something else strikes Drapes here, there was obviously one thing the late Dick could not cure, else he wouldn't be the late would he.



Last edited by tony draper; 22nd Nov 2003 at 06:38.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 06:47
  #3537 (permalink)  

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Viscious little b'stards are yer robins, redandwhite. Extremely territorial and combative, will chase off much bigger birds. Only got the Christmas pitch 'cos there ain't anything cuter around that time of year, not for being appropriate to peace an' good will to any other bu99er.
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 06:47
  #3538 (permalink)  
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Really bored now...

Can a parrot
Eat a carrot
Standing on its head?
If it could my Mum would send me
Straight upstairs to bed

S Milligan, "Book of Silly Verse"
 
Old 22nd Nov 2003, 07:01
  #3539 (permalink)  
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Two snowmen on the front lawn, one says to the other.
"Can you smell carrots" ?
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Old 22nd Nov 2003, 07:14
  #3540 (permalink)  
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Two birds on a perch, one says to the other:
"Can you smell fish?"
 

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