Go Back  PPRuNe Forums > PPRuNe Social > Jet Blast
Reload this Page >

I have extreme moments of daftness, but should have seen this coming.

Jet Blast Topics that don't fit the other forums. Rules of Engagement apply.

I have extreme moments of daftness, but should have seen this coming.

Old 5th Jul 2020, 01:49
  #1 (permalink)  
Psychophysiological entity
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Tweet Rob_Benham Famous author. Well, slightly famous.
Age: 80
Posts: 4,871
I have extreme moments of daftness, but should have seen this coming.

Door lock on my little BMW 318i compact E46 locks but does not unlock. A year goes by. I'll have a bash, thinks I.

It took quite a while to get the lock out of the door. The thing about my little 2002 car is that it's so kind of unworn. The lump came out looking really new. However, I couldn't see a way to get into it. It has a strong plastic plate at two angles, 90 degrees apart. I can get most of it off but then on the vertical edge, there's a load of levers on two shafts. My guess is that if I pull I'll have a pile of springs and bits. Can't risk it until I've got a replacement.

Hundreds of them from 9.99. There must be a man at BM that sits and designs new door locks/latches - all day, every day. However, there's only one BMW part 51217011248. 169 QUID Why? The universe is taunting me. This morning I put the lock back in, and then fitted the airba . . . . OH, FOOOOEY. I'd connected the power because of that daft business of having to climb in the boot via the cab if there's no power to open the lid. OH, DOUBLE FOOOOOOOOOOOOEY.

Now I've got a bag warning light on. I know, I'll look on the net.

Google finds a nice young man with a silver car. The dash looks mostly like mine. He says the Warning is a common fault and that we can fix it without cost. Hooooray.

He shows me how to get at my fuses, and just the one to pull. I pull it, and the WL goes out. I put the fuse back in and the WL comes on again. I try all permutations of doing this while IGN is on, off, me standing on my head, whistling Dixie . . . nothing works. I go back to the NUMBER ONE GOOGLE SPOT to the young man and run his epic film again. He suggests that there's the remotest chance this procedure may not leave the bag system working and to write in if one knows different. Hmmm, I'd thought that was just a common sense thing to say, but then I realised - he'd NEVER PUT THE FUSE BACK. Oh, flippin 'ek. A man makes a film production to tell us to throw a fuse away.

Well, he did sound a bit funnin'. Can we say that now the FSL is gone? I should find him and slap him around the headbone with a two bi four, before he tells us to take the wheels off to avoid skidding.

Anyway, now I've got to find an impossible lock, AND get me airbag recognised. Any ideas. I've tried the underpants and pencil solution.
Loose rivets is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 03:59
  #2 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Australia
Posts: 965
Can it be rectified using an OBD engine scan tool thingy?

They are cheap now and easy to use, plus you have the benefit of being able to recognize/ correct error codes.
currawong is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 05:01
  #3 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: adelaide australia
Posts: 270
Just did this job on my Honda, cost me $20...

Door lock actuator: https://www.google.com/aclk?sa=L&ai=...2CkIjQM&adurl=



gileraguy is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 05:33
  #4 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: Hampshire
Posts: 29
Loose - Replacing the locks in those are an absolute nightmare. I did it and it took me the whole day on my E36 Coupe - and that was with three of us combining brain power.
Might be best to find a BMW specialist bloke to do it for you.
Re; Airbag light. Disconnect battery for 45 minutes should clear the OBD error. (Find Radio code first!)
Auxtank is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 08:52
  #5 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: uk
Posts: 1,651
I solved a non-working door lock on my Volvo by dribbling WD40 down the inside locking post. Worked a treat except I have to repeat the treatment occasionally. I only use three tools on my old cars, WD40, duck tape and a hammer. The hammer has saved me a fortune over the years. Works on power steering pumps, ABS units etc.
pulse1 is online now  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 08:59
  #6 (permalink)  

Avoid imitations
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Wandering the FIR and cyberspace often at highly unsociable times
Posts: 12,726
I eventually sold my 330D because I got fed up of failing door locks. It's a dockyard job to get at them and the gears and other parts are made of a white plastic which seems to have a working life of about ten years before weakening and cracking.
ShyTorque is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 11:04
  #7 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 486
Originally Posted by ShyTorque View Post
. It's a dockyard job to get at them
Havenít heard that expression in a long, long time !
NRU74 is online now  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 11:16
  #8 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: UK
Posts: 1,306
WD40 is ... a water dispersant - hence the initials. Once it has dispersed the water, the remnants become dry and sticky and require more ... WD40!. Jolly good for the shareholders but...
Doubt that the devotees will change their habits, but 'puff powder' (as my plumber friend described it) finely ground lead powder, is a much better solution for freeing locks. For general lubrication, the range of silicone penetrant sprays do well.
Cornish Jack is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 12:12
  #9 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Reading, UK
Posts: 11,885
Originally Posted by Cornish Jack View Post
'puff powder' (as my plumber friend described it) finely ground lead powder
That would be lead as in "lead pencil" i.e. not lead at all.
DaveReidUK is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 12:15
  #10 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Lemonia. Best Greek in the world
Posts: 1,657
Loose's next trick will be to take apart the key for an E46 compact. There are videos on the 'ternet thingy, but the detailed soldering required on re-assembly with new battery is beyond me...........
Ancient Observer is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 12:51
  #11 (permalink)  
601
 
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: Brisbane, Qld, Australia
Age: 74
Posts: 1,131
The hammer has saved me a fortune over the years. Works on power steering pumps, ABS units etc.
Technical taps. Adjust as required to fix the problem.
601 is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 12:55
  #12 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: UK
Posts: 1,306
DR - Correct, of course! Just me being lazy (quite common). Appropriately shaped Carpenters' Pencil inners can be similarly useful.
Cornish Jack is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 12:59
  #13 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: UK
Posts: 1,306
The hammer has saved me a fortune over the years.
Otherwise known as a 'Birmingham screwdriver'.
Cornish Jack is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 13:30
  #14 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: on the ground
Posts: 306
Originally Posted by Loose rivets View Post
There must be a man at BM that sits and designs new door locks/latches - all day, every day.
Very unlikely.
I can confirm that latches are his speciality, but he's probably at Arvin Meritor Light Vehicle Systems, or one of their competitors. In ~2000 they were just Meritor LVS (Light Vehicle Systems obviously); in 1997 they were Rockwell LVS. Look closely at the latch assembly for the brand of the supplier.
nonsense is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 15:26
  #15 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: UK
Posts: 1,417
Good luck Mr Rivets, I hope you persevere and get it sorted.

Mrs Uplinker's car ignition and steering lock broke recently, with the engine running. The key just revolved round and round loosely without actuating anything. I had to pull the fuses for the ECM and the fuel pump to stop the engine.

After a LOT of struggling, I removed the steering and ignition lock assembly from the car, (very difficult) took it apart (very difficult) and found that a part deep inside had broken: (The small half round item 2nd from the left in the photo):

I asked my son to 3D print a replacement. I reassembled the lock, replaced it in the car with a LOT of struggling and very difficult, and........it works perfectly !

Saved hundreds of pounds for a new part and many more hundreds for a main dealer to remove and fit.

All the above steps were extremely fiddly and required taking apart half the dash, lots of cups of tea, lots of thinking and about 3 days in total to complete.




Uplinker is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 16:31
  #16 (permalink)  
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Lincolnshire
Age: 77
Posts: 16,695
Had a problem with the ignition switch on my SAAB 99, hard to extract, harder to insert. To access required removal of seats, removal of gear lever housing cover, removal of the housing itself. You needed a deep socket for a triangular bolt.

​​​​​​The solution was two part. Lever key in ignition , cover with a duster, use second key for the doors. Ultimate solution was to sell the card. My final words to the salesman was keep the duster, don't remove the key. 😁
Pontius Navigator is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 17:46
  #17 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Here 'n' there!
Posts: 384
The 1st ex-Missus of mine (I've married a few in my time - 'nother blooming story!!! ) had to buy a new "secondhand" car once (OK, after I blew hers up - didn't realise very old Suzuki Altos are so fragile!) and she decided on a small, oldish, Volvo (this is back in the mid 90's) - as "they are so reliable!". After a while, odd failure mode suddenly appeared.

Car would start and set off fine but then, after about 5 minutes would die. Would not restart ... until left for about 10 minutes - then, re-starts fine and no problems thereafter that day. Happened several times in a row so was "ordered" to sort problem out. Mmmmm, runs fine - splutters - dies - will not restart, will not restart, will not restart ..... starts. Fine thereafter - till next day!

Mmmmm, thinks? Basic flying training - sounds like ......... carb ice. Starts, runs for a while - ice builds up - no air in - engine dies - after a while residual heat melts ice - engine can be restarted but is now warm enough to prevent further carb ice forming.

So, off with the air filter and the cover to the bimetallic controller for the cold/hot air flapper valve. Sure enough, broken plastic linky thing between bimetallic widger and the flapper valve! I know, a paper-clip will sort that out so installed said paper clip to replace broken plastic-bit! Bingo!!!!!

Finally PX'ed the car in for a newer one after a couple of years (shortly before PX-ing the old wife in for a newer model - but that's all part of the other story!!) and it still had paper-clip fitted (the car that is, not the ex-wife - just in case, dear PPRuNer, you are finding the plot a tad confusing here!).

Moral of the story? You can't beat classic Aviation Fault Finding and Royal Navy Engineering "Bodge-jobs"!!!! Decades later, still use that winning combo!! Oh, and finally found a decent wife!!!!!! Shame about the step-kids tho!!!! Ho hum!!! Toodle-pip! H 'n' H
Hot 'n' High is online now  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 18:41
  #18 (permalink)  
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Lincolnshire
Age: 77
Posts: 16,695
HnH, I used to ski on Cyprus. I had chains so could get to the slopes when Cyps couldn't.

The drag lift was powered by a petrol motor. It kept failing though icing. I told him home my SAAB Air inlet was pointed towards the exhaust manifold so it got hot air.

He did that and got the lift working fine thereafter




Pontius Navigator is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 19:08
  #19 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: northofwhereiusedtobe
Posts: 1,303
Originally Posted by Hot 'n' High View Post

So, off with the air filter and the cover to the bimetallic controller for the cold/hot air flapper valve. Sure enough, broken plastic linky thing between bimetallic widger and the flapper valve! I know, a paper-clip will sort that out so installed said paper clip to replace broken plastic-bit! Bingo!!!!!
We had a 2002 VW Polo 1.4 16v 100hp until a couple of years ago,it had developed a flat mechanical rattle which eventually I worked out was that particular engines variation on 'Pinking',when delving into it I realised that the engine actually required 98ron super unleaded which got rid of most of the pinking - except on hot days.I did a little more internet research and discovered that the cold/hot air flapper valve in the air intake was controlled by a 'Waxstat' - these waxstats tended to 'fail' in the winter setting (ie hot air to engine) and that the high tech 'fix' was to push the waxstat fully open with a screwdriver and then put a long woodscrew right through the plastic intake to jam the little '[email protected]' fully open - worked a treat
longer ron is offline  
Old 5th Jul 2020, 23:16
  #20 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Great South East, tired and retired
Posts: 2,889
I had a SsangYong Rexton (Korean licence-built Mercedes in disguise) which developed a weird fault. Some days, the car would refuse to get out of "Park", requiring the judicious use of a chopstick down the hole to release the lock. Once moving, the cruise control would refuse to engage. Other days, just fine. While this problem was happening, I kept a chopstick in the centre console, and I would have to brief any car park attendants on how to move the car.

After some time, it went back to the dealer, and of course the car behaved and didn't spit the dummy. Sadly, I lived 90 mins drive from the dealer, so it wasn't easy to just drop everything when it misbehaved and gallop down to the dealer - but one day I got the whoops with it and did just that. Some detailed troubleshooting found a dicky connector on the brake pedal. When the brake is depressed, the cruise control will not engage, and when the brake is not depressed, you cannot get out of Park. The dicky switch would flip itself over on a random basis, and on one of those days, it seemed the brake lights were on all the time (no cruise control available) until I pressed the brake pedal, when they went off! New switch fitted, problem solved. Chopstick dispensed with. But next time I went back to that carpark, the attendant said "Ah, the chopstick man!"
Ascend Charlie is offline  

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information

Copyright © 2018 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.