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Ask a woman a question?

Old 8th Nov 2013, 20:25
  #1 (permalink)  

Avoid imitations
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Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Wandering the FIR and cyberspace often at highly unsociable times
Posts: 12,226
Ask a woman a question?

Is it me?

I get told that sometimes I don't take enough interest....

About six weeks or so ago, I was informed that Mother in law's broadband had become too slow or intermittent. I was asked in a round about way to drive 35 miles and have a look, then to give my opinion (I'm apparently supposed to know about these things). The pretext of getting me there was that a curtain rail had fallen off the lounge wall. I went and fixed the curtain rail but then ..... "While you are here, I just wondered if ...."

I had a look; after some basic diagnostic work my considered opinion was that it was an intermittent provider fault and the provider should therefore be contacted to look at the problem.

This didn't happen, what do I know? Next thing is, I'm being told about a chap who lives opposite sister in law who "knows about computers". I got to hear all about his background, what he is up to in his life these days, etc etc. Good, say I, but if it's a provider fault the provider needs to be contacted because only they can fix their problem. Not unexpectedly, instead of the provider, the chap opposite sister in law was asked to ring mother in law to fix the fault. This was about a month ago. At this point I left them to it.

The saga reared its head again last weekend when mother in law said that computer chap who lives opposite sister in law never got in touch. Again I said the provider should be contacted, not some random computer chap who lives opposite sister in law.

This advice was finally taken a few days ago but by then of course it was no longer my idea, it was something they had thought of by themselves.

My other half visited her mother and between them they rang the TISCALI helpline and managed to tie them in knots for about an hour. Problems they had included trying to find the router serial number on a totally unrelated piece of hardware (a card reader), whilst totally ignoring the router right in front of their noses which has the words TISCALI printed on it in two places. They also unsuccessfully tried to use an old mouse which for some reason was lying on the desk alongside the real mouse on the mat right in front of their noses and has been in daily use.

Eventually, it was discovered that the fault was a provider fault and yesterday a technician was due to turn up to fix it.

Tonight, not having heard anything for a couple of days, I asked if mother in law's broadband had been fixed.

I got most of the the entire saga repeated to me over again. However, the story now began with news that the chap who lives opposite mother in law had been in touch. Apparently he charges £40 and hour but doesn't charge a call-out fee, etc etc. I couldn't understand how he was now relevant, bearing in mind that Tiscali had said they were sending someone round. I asked if the Tiscali engineer had been to fix the fault yet.

I was told that I wasn't listening.

After about five minutes of listening to what seemed to me to be totally unrelated information, I asked if I could just re-ask my original question. "IS YOUR MOTHER'S BROADBAND WORKING YET, OR NOT?"

I got told off in no uncertain terms for not taking an interest in what she was saying!

"Well, is it working yet, or not?"

Answer: "I DO NOT KNOW!!! Why do you always want a straight answer?"



Well, is it me......?
ShyTorque is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 20:33
  #2 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Torono
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.....40 quid an hour, that's qute cheap, get her to call the provider.
Dak Man is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 20:39
  #3 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Florida
Age: 67
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Sorry, I nodded off. About that curtain rail. . .
Limeygal is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 20:40
  #4 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Australia - South of where I'd like to be !
Age: 54
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Shy

No, it's not you.

I worked in the computer industry for quite a few years
and stuck by my rule of never getting involved with family
or friends and computers.

I'd give advice like where to go, who to call, maybe which products
to get but that's it.

You did the right thing, they need to call the service provider.


I must admit, I broke my own rule recently when my GF's sons computer was playing up, specifically it wouldn't load Google, only IE. I fluffed around
a couple of times that week, couldn't get it to work. He was getting seriously stressed over it, he;s a stress head !. I then asked him why it was so important,
what piece of school work was so important that he needed Google to work ?

His response. No schoolwork, I prefer to watch youtube and play games
using Google as it is so much better than IE

I packed up there and then and went and had a coffee - and let my GF
know what his answer was ! She was not impressed.

So, stick to your guns.
500N is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 20:40
  #5 (permalink)  

Avoid imitations
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Join Date: Nov 2000
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.....40 quid an hour, that's qute cheap, get her to call the provider.
Don't you start!

ShyTorque is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 20:41
  #6 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Florida
Age: 67
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. . . . . .
Limeygal is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 21:42
  #7 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 165
Shy Torque

I know exactly what you meant in your original post, I also try very hard not to ask SWMBO a question if I can avoid it
Do you get the "it's not that important you don't have to do it now" speech as well ? I know that it is NOT in my best interests
to actually believe that statement.
Nervous SLF is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 22:07
  #8 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Crowle United Kingdom
Age: 46
Posts: 350
You think thats cheap?. I do computer repairs but charge around that. I helped out in my friends computer shop once and this woman came in all irate telling my boss he had questionable parentage etc because her fff ccc eyc etc router was ffff dead..
So me to woman. Do you have the power supply so we can test it ( at that point we was unsure if we had one that would fit ). To which she responded of course not you monumentally brain dead stupid fff man if you bother to look it saus wireless so obviously it doesnt need wires full stop!.
So I had a rummage and found spookily enough the same power supply and voila it lit up like a Christmas tree.
Said woman went very pale and quiet. And told us shed just taken it out of the box and set it on her mantle. Wondering why no lights came on.
Hell even the Indian at an unmentionable provider told her he didnt belive she had it plugged in. She was a little coy after learning as I pointed out that pretty much all electronic devices dont run on spooky energies but need a connection to the electric socket and oddly enough for a communications point
Her response. But it said wireless on the box.
Omg she said you must think im so stupid.
But being me I said ach dont worry lets get you sorted out. Went out installed it And was asked to speak to a certain Indian call centre.
Who in fairness I find them entertaining and helpfull if you know what to say.
Anyway I got hold of the manager shed spoken to.
He explained hed been called everything he couldn't repeat and of all the things shed do had she have been in india to get him.
But how we laughed when he said. Maddam have you not got the basic intelligence to read the very plain instruction that in order to get a dsl connection you must plug it into the phone line.
Otherwise you will be trying to the end of time to get it to work.
Her response But it says its wireless on the box. Im sueing for missselling and labling it !.

Ive seen so many things I could write a book.
From the strange man in Paisley who had come to the door trousers round his ankles with a crazed look in his eye and telling me that 'they' were watching him.
'They turned out to be the majic group allegedly keeping tabs on him after he saw a ufo over his house.
This he knew because the hard disk activity light he reckoned was flashing in sequence so at that point I politley said id have to take it back to the workshop as it was obviously very serious.
There was no way I was going in his flat!.

And Finally When working for Tiny...
Their call centre once sent me to an old lady in Eastbourne.
The call centre lad had told her that she was right and that the dripping water sound from the pc was a leaking coolant pipe. So they sent me.
Of course Tiny's pc's had liquid cooled computers.
I solved it almost without touching it.
I asked her ' I bet when you go make a brew and you come back you hear water'
Shocked she asked how did you know.
So I explained that when she left the pc the screensaver would come on . The screen saver with the speakers so loud you couldnt bear it was fish under the see. Every time little cyber nemo took a cyber breath the water on the screen bubbled and thus was solved ...
I love the job and working with people.
I wonder what other stories about this kind of thing you guys have.
Granted mods I know this is an Air forum but It was a good example of day in the life of a computer engineer.
One final one tho is related to both.
Id flown Aerlingus on a very nice smooth Airbus320.
On landing at BHX. The landing was very hard and I think the pilot was competing to see how many bounces he could do .
So as I was getting off the pilot was there so He asked me if I had enjoyed the flight.
I said I had. But I have just two questions.

1. How is the plane upright still as im sure you left your landing geat at the side of the runway
2. (This resulted in peals of laughter from the other passengers close to me)., Did you land the plane or did we get shot down????
onyxcrowle is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 22:14
  #9 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,897
Women have different motivations for many (but annoyingly not all) things.

After about a year teaching in an all-girls boarding school, with a largely female staff, I'd mostly figured them out. It just takes a little concentration. After 6 years.....

Note that when they say "You just don't understand me!", you aren't hated half as much as someone like me who they know does (mostly) understand them. They don't have an easy 'out' then.
Fox3WheresMyBanana is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 23:27
  #10 (permalink)  

Avoid imitations
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Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Wandering the FIR and cyberspace often at highly unsociable times
Posts: 12,226
Do you get the "it's not that important you don't have to do it now" speech as well ? I know that it is NOT in my best interests
to actually believe that statement.
Yes, often.

I also hear "I don't want to disturb you just now but......."

Or, while I'm struggling with one difficult or impossible DIY job (often required because someone not me has done something stupid or careless to break something)...

"I just wondered, can you have a look at this other little job....."

Or another favourite: "I wonder if you could make this work..."

Me: "Have you read the manual?"

She: "No, I thought I'd just ask you first.."

Me: "Where is the manual?"

She: "I think I might have thrown it away with the box....it's not my fault!"
ShyTorque is offline  
Old 8th Nov 2013, 23:38
  #11 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Nowhere near Shinbone Waterhole
Posts: 201
ST - its blondes I have that kind of trouble with.
mikedreamer787 is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 00:33
  #12 (permalink)  

Avoid imitations
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Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Wandering the FIR and cyberspace often at highly unsociable times
Posts: 12,226
Yes...... Me too. They wouldn't survive in the wild.
ShyTorque is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 01:01
  #13 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 1998
Location: Mesopotamos
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When are you smart fellas gonna learn to play dumb.

She: "Can you fix this?"
He: "Nah."

Where the real answer is:
"Yes I can but I've got a round of golf on this afternoon and plan on going for few drinks afterwards, I'm sure you understand and will happily accept that."
cattletruck is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 01:19
  #14 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Nowhere near Shinbone Waterhole
Posts: 201
Don't answer blonde questions

"Do I look fat hon?"

"Nah. You look great."

"Oh come on...you're my boyfriend. Who else can I ask to get a truthful answer?"

"Well you could lose about 3 kilos I suppose, mainly around your hips...."

"Whaaat? I've been working hard on a diet for 2 weeks and you haven't noticed I'm skinnier?"

"You skinnier?"

"YES I AM SKINNIER! AND YOU DIDN'T NOTICE!!"

"Well, yes now that you mention it you have lost weight."

"So how do I look hon?"

"You look great."

Thanks. Love you!


mikedreamer787 is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 02:56
  #15 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Perth - Western Australia
Age: 70
Posts: 1,803
I'd give advice like where to go ...
500N - I give that kind of advice fairly regularly, but not many people seem to take it ...
onetrack is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 03:03
  #16 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Below Escape Velocity
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Woman comes out with one pair of shoes on feet, one pair in hand, and you MUST leave immediately for an evening engagement. Far as you can tell, they're identical.

"Which pair do you think I should wear?"

The answer you want is the most expeditious, and it is decidedly NOT:

"It doesn't matter… come on, let's GO!"

There is only one way to negotiate this trap, and I share it here:

"Um… put on the second pair."

"OK…"

"I like the first pair best. Switch them in the car. We're late."
Um... lifting... is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 04:58
  #17 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Planet Tharg
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Or you're doing something and concentrating on it and they'll come in and stand there staring at you. Trying to hold on to your train of thought you look up and say "Is something the matter?" You're answered by the question "Are you busy?" to which the obvious answer is "Not any more" while kissing your train of thought goodbye. You will then be asked something completely bone, to which the answer is glaringly obvious to anyone capable of peeing against a tree while standing up with a beer in one hand.

how bone is your missus.
Solid Rust Twotter is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 05:05
  #18 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Australia - South of where I'd like to be !
Age: 54
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Mike

I have been going through that for the last week, due to he having a wedding to go to

Started last weekend with the try the dress on she bought, then the other one she bought because she thought she was too big for the first dress

I must go now, have to go and whisper sweet nothings in here ear
and tell her she looks wonderful before she leaves !!!
500N is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 07:08
  #19 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Londinium
Posts: 28
I would like to know how the missus has a few days off of work and pretty much does as she wants, shopping, eateries etc, just enjoying her own time. Then I come back on day 7, having just flown for 7 days straight, waking up at all crazy times, walk through the door and "bang" i am instantly handed a list of jobs that must be completed tomorrow otherwise the household is going to crumble........Where is the justice in that??
Daygo is offline  
Old 9th Nov 2013, 08:47
  #20 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 92
Oh yeah. And when one does not ask, you guys feel neglected and unincluded.
probes is offline  

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