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Friday Jokes

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Friday Jokes

Old 9th May 2012, 09:47
  #1041 (permalink)  
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Yes Coati, it has been posted on JB. Try "Veet for men".

And yes, hysterical posts there. Amazon should sell them !

============================================

The teacher is taking a class in composition. "Now class" she says "I want you to complete this two-line verse with a single line:

"A Grecian Goddess on a Hunt...."

Well class ? Anyone ?"

She desperately tries to ignore little Johnny who is jumping up and down with his arm raised saying "Please Miss, Please Miss" but since no other child answers she reluctantly says with a sigh "Well, Johnny ?"

Little Johnny stands up and says, "Please Miss
A Grecian Goddess on a Hunt
Was ringed by dogs which sniffed her.....
Miss, is this poetry or prose, Miss ?"

The teacher, thankful from the merciful escape from vulgarity, says "Prose, Johnny".

Little Johnny takes a deep breath and starts again.
"A Grecian Goddess on a Hunt
Was ringed by dogs which sniffed her tw*t."

Last edited by OFSO; 9th May 2012 at 12:43.
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Old 9th May 2012, 15:22
  #1042 (permalink)  
 
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I'd love to see this become a part of the Red Bull comps!

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Old 9th May 2012, 16:30
  #1043 (permalink)  
 
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Very mooving.

Why didn't he use his horn?
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Old 9th May 2012, 16:58
  #1044 (permalink)  
 
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It's a she and they don't have horns.
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Old 9th May 2012, 19:00
  #1045 (permalink)  
 
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Somebody has a sense of humor...
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Old 9th May 2012, 20:15
  #1046 (permalink)  

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Do tell ...

Nothing to be seen there.
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Old 9th May 2012, 21:15
  #1047 (permalink)  
 
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I suspect that this is not a joke at all.



April Statistics On Airport Screening
UK Border Force

Terrorists Discovered

0
Transvestites
133
Hernias
1,485
Hemorrhoid Cases
3,172
Enlarged Prostates
8,249
Breast Implants
59,350
Natural Blondes
3
Politicians with Balls
0
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Old 9th May 2012, 22:02
  #1048 (permalink)  
 
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That advanced cow-tipping looks like great fun, although they could have been hurt - the steaks were quite high.

Lucky there wasn't an udder one in front of them.

That pilot seems like a bit of a cowboy.

He'd have a bit of a beef with the animal's owner, you'd think.

To fly is human, to land is bovine.

I could go on all day! But to save you the pain, I'll stop now.
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Old 10th May 2012, 01:13
  #1049 (permalink)  

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Old 10th May 2012, 01:31
  #1050 (permalink)  
 
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Does that Ad stuff really sell cars ?
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Old 10th May 2012, 01:37
  #1051 (permalink)  

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Clearly not. (If you've seen the latest figures released by Ford in Oz)
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Old 10th May 2012, 11:41
  #1052 (permalink)  
 
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Sorry, can somebody explain how to insert a .jpeg if that's not opening myself to some serious ribbing?
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Old 10th May 2012, 11:44
  #1053 (permalink)  

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The kid next door just challenged me to a water fight......










Typing this whilst waiting for the kettle to boil
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Old 10th May 2012, 13:44
  #1054 (permalink)  

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OPENDOOR. If the jpeg is on the internet somewhere, you "cut" the www.___.com/___.jpg address, select the icon that shows a mountain with a moon above it (picture), and paste the address in the box that pops up.

If it's a personal file, on your PC, you'll need to host it somewhere, like in Photobucket.
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Old 10th May 2012, 14:15
  #1055 (permalink)  

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I was at the swimming baths the other day, and I decided to have a crafty pee in the deep end. The lifeguard must have spotted me, because he blew his bloody whistle so loud I nearly fell in!
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Old 10th May 2012, 18:23
  #1056 (permalink)  
 
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Old 11th May 2012, 07:30
  #1057 (permalink)  
 
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@slash
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Old 11th May 2012, 12:35
  #1058 (permalink)  
 
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from a test:

In English reading is werry easy only with understunding can be a problems.
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Old 11th May 2012, 16:25
  #1059 (permalink)  
 
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My favourite bunny joke :


Last edited by Tableview; 11th May 2012 at 16:27.
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Old 11th May 2012, 20:37
  #1060 (permalink)  
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Sorry, can somebody explain how to insert a .jpeg if that's not opening myself to some serious ribbing?
Depends if you are a boy or a grrrl, and where you want to insert it.
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