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AH failure in IMC

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AH failure in IMC

Old 10th Sep 2010, 05:36
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AH failure in IMC

Why not use a water bottle?
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 05:38
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Bob Hoover Airplane Roll
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 05:42
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Because cats or birds are known to be better distinguishers of up from down, and sloshing water in a bottle is known to cause PIO.
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 05:44
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You actually need to have a perpetually falling piece of buttered toast. Which ever way the butter is facing is down.
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:04
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What happens if you get thirsty?
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:09
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Cat & Duck method works, water bottle doesn't!

Place a live cat on the cockpit floor. Because a cat always remains upright, he or she can be used in lieu of a needle and ball. Merely watch to see which way the cat leans to determine if a wing is low and, if so, which one.

The duck is used for the instrument approach and landing. Because any sensible duck will refuse to fly under instrument conditions, it is only necessary to hurl your duck out of the plane and follow her to the ground.

There are some limitations to the Cat-and-Duck Method, but by rigidly adhering to the following check list, a degree of success will be achieved.
  • Get a wide-awake cat. Most cats do not want to stand up at all, at any time. It may be necessary to get a large fierce dog in the cockpit to keep the cat at attention.
  • Make sure your cat is clean. Dirty cats will spend all their time washing. Trying to follow a cat licking itself usually results in a tight snap roll, followed by an inverted (or flat) spin. You can see this is very unsanitary.
  • Old cats are best. Young cats have nine lives, but an old used-up cat with only one life left has just as much to lose an you do and will therefore be more dependable.
  • Beware of cowardly ducks. If the duck discovers that you are using the cat to stay upright - or straight and level- she will refuse to leave without the cat. Ducks are no better on instruments than you are.
  • Be sure the duck has good eyesight. Nearsighted ducks sometimes will go flogging off into the nearest hill. Very short-sighted ducks will not realize they have been thrown out and will descend to the ground in a sitting position. This maneuver is quite difficult to follow in an airplane.
  • Use land-loving ducks. It is very discouraging to break out and find yourself on final approach for some farm in Dubbo. Also, the farmers there suffer from temporary insanity when chasing crows off their corn fields and will shoot anything that flies.
  • Choose your duck carefully. It is easy to confuse ducks with geese because many water birds look alike. While they are very competent instrument flyers , geese seldom want to go in the same direction you do. If your duck heads off for the Murray, you may be sure you have been given the goose.

Last edited by tmpffisch; 10th Sep 2010 at 09:50. Reason: typo
 
Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:13
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Tmppfisch

Yes that is good advice indeed

But what if my dog is restrained in a suitable container as per the CAO's. how will he be a deterrant to the cat?
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:15
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tmpffisch
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But what if my dog is restrained in a suitable container as per the CAO's. how will he be a deterrant to the cat?
There is no reason you can't cage a cat along with the dog (same cage), just like you can cage your AH.
 
Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:18
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Forget the water, use scotch.
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:21
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If you make coordinated turns, water bottle = useless.

If however, you dont touch the rudders, water bottle not as initially useless as first suspected.

Its still stupid however. Get an iphone 4, has a built in [email protected] ring gyro.
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:29
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You sure its a [email protected] ring gyro????

More like a solid state one.

Now this will have Wallys butt cheeks sucking up the seat cover...and maybe the whole chair

Part 1


and Part 2


Thanks to the NON-TSO equipment.
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:37
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I must admit I am somewhat concerned that someone with a CPL working as a C208 driver would ask such a question!

Did you not cover gyros and their function in any of your training?
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:52
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Make your own gyro:

Buttered cat paradox - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:54
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wow how a joke can be taken so seriously
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 06:59
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It's a joke now eh, I did once come across a ppl aspiring to be a cpl who believed in the water bottle theory, there are some wide cracks in the training system which many people seem to fall through on there way to becoming instructors. The water bottle will only work in the same way as a balance ball. Back up instruments and some practise on limited panel are the only way to get around an AH fail.

Last edited by Aerodynamisist; 10th Sep 2010 at 07:39.
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 07:05
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My long pants became shorts hearing that ! (Jaba's post)
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 08:05
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Duck and Cat method

Tmpffisch,
I don't recall these D and C's procedures at all , are they an ATPL subject?
Also can you use an approved chicken instead of a duck , it's GA and chickens are a lot cheaper.
I wouldn't use your i phone as a AH i think it's insides include a inertia sensor that may drift alot , maybe 20 deg/hr , you could end up from where you started , and still in cloud.Just use it for finding the nearest pub.
MC
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 08:53
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tmpffisch, that has to be in the running for POTY.

Now, where did I put that mop.
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 09:15
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Jaba

I just gave you 15mins of my life.

What sort of plane was it? Who's flying non tso gear into ice to the fright levels??????
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Old 10th Sep 2010, 09:17
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Who the hell copies down ATC's phone number with a failed engine?!
Only in America
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