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British embassies tired of bizarre requests

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British embassies tired of bizarre requests

Old 23rd Sep 2009, 13:38
  #61 (permalink)  

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Ah!!

But they do bake exceedingly good cakes
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Old 23rd Sep 2009, 13:44
  #62 (permalink)  
 
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Mr Kipling is now at Ikea
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Old 23rd Sep 2009, 13:51
  #63 (permalink)  

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Humbug and fiddlesticks to Mr Kipling.

Until you have sampled the excellent offerings at the aformentioned establishment, you have missed a treat of exquisite delight.

Accompanied by a cup of their excellent java, one is transported to confectionary heaven
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Old 23rd Sep 2009, 14:34
  #64 (permalink)  
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A day busking in Dante's inferno would be more enjoyable.

MB, you summed it up to a T.

My German friend Dr. G., on having been to IKEA for the first time in his life at an elderly age, said on coming out "It is like hell".

And he went for the same reason that all us married men go there.......

Personally when I am forced between those hallowed yellow and blue gates, I get away from the wife and go and stand and look at light bulbs. What do other men do (that is, what do the other men do who are too weak-willed to refuse to go altogether) ?
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Old 23rd Sep 2009, 14:41
  #65 (permalink)  
 
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El Grifo

Have done the late nite dinner at nearest one followed by mind numbing walk round.

Coming out there were 2 Americans asking a security guard, "Was this area bombed heavily during the Second World War", not knowing he replied parts were and they responded with "Are they ever going to repair it."

Somehow I think Luftwaffe did less damage than the pursuit of profit.
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Old 23rd Sep 2009, 17:39
  #66 (permalink)  

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Mmm, We could hardly call you lot metrosexual males could we


Mind you where I live, half an hour in the hallowed Yellow and Blue halls is a bit of excitement, not to mention the cakes
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Old 23rd Sep 2009, 18:37
  #67 (permalink)  
 
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making it clear that I would be operating an aircraft in their area of responsibility,
Was this asking Embassys in Baghdad and Kabul just before you go in country perchance ?

Ok, coat, hat, chute etc
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Old 26th Sep 2009, 22:04
  #68 (permalink)  
 
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In the late nineties I was working in North Eastern China and my passport was running out. I could not get to Beijing personally so I did it by post. I was a bit worried about the Chinese postal system but everything went well and I got my new passport in a week. I left China on my old visa in my previous passport and then had to get another visa for my new one. This went well and I travelled in and out of China for about another year.
I was leaving the country at Shenzhen so I handed my passport to the frontier policeman, (immigration/emigration officer) with my exit card tucked in my current visa page. He, like countless others checked that the visa was current, flicked to the photo and details page, checked it was me and then he did something different. He looked at the front page. He stood up, bellowed at the supervisor and the next thing I knew I was in the office wondering how I was going to explain that the numbers on the front page and the photo page were different.
I did not know why. I had never looked at the front page, I was unaware there was a number there anyway. I now had a senior frontier guard forcibly telling me that I was travelling on a forged passport and I had the feeling that the next stop was the slammer. I managed to get a word in and he let me phone up our company secretary. I explained to her what had happened and then my interrogator explained what he had decided what had happened. There then followed several minutes of airborne time by my mobile as she tried to convince him that it was a mistake and keeping me updated. Finally in frustration I told her that I had been though the border at least six times with this passport without any trouble.

That was the Magic Information.

I was told to pass the phone over and then followed a continuous stream of high speed Mandarin with the poor old bloke looking totally crestfallen, perusing my previous entry and exit stamps. The jist of her conversation was that as they had let me in and out with this passport a few times previously then they must all be ignorant and stupid not to have picked it up before. This was a severe loss of face. To sum it up they gave me back my passport and I left the country. There was a bit of knocking knees when entering and leaving Hong Kong and entering the UK but nobody noticed.

When I got back I had to get another passport. I filled in the form, sent it off with a couple of photos and a letter saying why and what had happened. Next day there was a frantic telephoned apology from the Glasgow passport office and the day after that I had a new passport.

Still cost me 110 to get a new Chinese visa put in.
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Old 27th Sep 2009, 01:18
  #69 (permalink)  
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ive had more trouble when ive returned to new zealand for holiday than when i moved to aussie to begin with, when i first moved here, the customs chick at sydney airport didnt say anything, didnt ask if i had a job, nothing, within a minute i was thru, coming back to nz for christmas holidays 3 months later,
i got the works "why are you only here for a week, what will you be doing, where will you be staying
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Old 27th Sep 2009, 07:01
  #70 (permalink)  

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OFSO
Half the price and inextinguishable from the real thing.
I can see it now.

The immigration desk queries your 'iffy' passport, take it into the back office and set fire to it. They then attack it with Mr Chubb's finest fire distinguisher. If they cannot put it out within the benchmark time for a real passport they will let you through.

Well, they would if you had a passport!!
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Old 27th Sep 2009, 07:15
  #71 (permalink)  
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On this website Fun-Generatoren, Ausweis-, Zeitungs- und Mnz-Generator! you make make your own German ID card, althought it says Buntesrepublik Deutschland (Colourful Republic German) instead of Bundesrepublik Deutschland (Peoples Republic) and somewhere else appear the words "Totale Wahnsinne" (complete craziness). You upload your picture, name, details etc and print the card off at home, laminate it etc.

Somebody I know - not me, oh no, - used their card in the UK to prove their identity to a very official person, and apart from the remark "My but you are well travelled" it was accepted after scrutiny. Of course this would only work in countries such as the UK and USA where nobody has any knowledge of furrin' tongues.

Could probably be used to get a job with Baroness Scotland, oh no I forgot, she doesn't look at passports anyway.
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Old 27th Sep 2009, 07:56
  #72 (permalink)  
 
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ZK-NSJ: In your case I am not surprised, think yourself lucky they didn't put you on the first aircraft back to Ockerland.
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