Sad story about a high and mighty check airman
 

Recently visited an old instructor of mine who later became a check airman. He is afflicted with terminal cancer. We talked about the good times; sadly the conversation unfortunately turned to his regrets in life. He was a macho, gung ho kick ass type when he was check airman for a company in the Far East. He confessed to failing " some chinky Orientals " for some dubious reasons which he wasn't proud off now. Apparently they rubbed him the wrong way because " they seemed not docile and subservient like the other slitty eyes "; they dared to challenge and correct him when they caught on some of his mistakes.

Unfortunately because he failed them even though on very flimsy reasons, their careers were ruined as their company believed my instructor's ( John ) word as he was connected to Boeing company.

Now, on his deathbed, he confessed that his " kick ass " sentiments got the better of him and he had failed those chaps very unfairly. He had let racial stuff and intolerance of dissent from people who he thought were beneath him clouded his judgement .Now, how does he make amends? It's very disconcerting to see somone you look up to grimace with tears welling up; what ever happened to the flamboyant, cool Yeager with nerves of steel? I could scarcely offer any words of comfort, except that it was all in the past and he should dwell on his achievements instead. It was hard trying to steer the conversation to the positives. When I finally could bring his memories to the good old times we had, I quickly bade a hasty goodbye when the going was still good.

I must confess I didn't do a good job of comforting him; I was caught totally off guard. I never expect this to come up. His wife has asked me to visit again as she said that he seemed to open up better when he talked to me; gee, it is a real toughie. I respect the man and would really want to see him go happy, but...............

Looking for suggestions here from fellow aviators, or even instructors/checkers who may have met similar situations. Many thanks.

It is indeed sad. Several years ago when I was in the land of morning calm there was an ozzie chap on the T-7 who was a terror, but only to expats as he was probably too scared to fail the locals. This ex PNG bush pilot was hauled well above his station when the Koreans saw in him something useful; he was good in teaching fellow expats a lesson. He was a non type rated B777 DEC and his understanding of the T-7 was well below par; when challenged by B777 vets on some check flights because of his dubious knowledge, he used the " checker " card. Well, all the stress that came with a life of living a lie did him in; he ended up with the dreaded " C ". The last I heard, he survived the horrible medical treatment that entailed and most certainly wished him well despite his trangressions.

Away from his other life s a " checker " he was a reasonably fine bloke. However when he takes up that " jehovah " persona, the nice cap turned into an insufferable recalitrant.

I am quite sure he has his regrets from what I heard. Characters like these have our sympathies because of their inadequacies, they make life a misery for themselves and others. I hope stories like these will enlighten those self appointed skygods and make our careers in this profession more rewarding and fulfilling.

He was... a good man.
 

Such deathbed reflections are amends enough, for me. I read stories about people who have done far worse deeds, and show no remorse when they die. Right or wrong, I guess the unrepentant have their reasons, too.

The final stanza below may be the most quoted of all of T.S Eliot's poetry:

This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang but a whimper.


FIN

Chuck, I certainly agree with you that Lenny was hoisted well above his station. Sometimes, certain individuals have problems dealing with power and success; despots, tyrants and child movie stars who go off the rails all come to mind. He tended to over-react to minor infractions and at times seemed to have hold overs from his 767 days which clouded his understanding of the 777. Unfortunately, KAL was in need of some hatchet man and Lenny happened to unconsciously be one.

I guess he has paid his dues and let's wish him well. The last I heard he was Recuperating well somewhere in SE NSW. Godspeed Lenny.

As for Baba, your old mentor certainly need your support. Like Taras had written, such reflections are sufficient atonement as he certainly cannot set the clock back. If he is able too, a few words in this forum can lift that heavy burden. I am sure his " victims " had moved on, taken the sorry episodes as cest le vie. Your mentor's reflections on his former life is part of his own progress in his overall evolution. Good luck.

As pilots, many of us had suffered under such pieces of work masquerading as skygods. Some of us truly had our careers ruined. I had a friend who just gave up flying when he was unfairly failed by one such type of TRE eventhough he passed easily on the second attempt. If I may opined, should you ask him what such TRE who now have regretful reflection he would certainly tell that guy to commit harakiri. Much as we bleeding hearts will have sympathy about such deathbed confessions, notice should be given to such " terrors " that their regretful actions would have ruined the lives of their victims. I am sure there are plenty of such characters around.

Yes, maybe a public confession on a forum such as this will ease his guilty and many of us will proffer some words of comfort to help him though his difficult days.

I agree that if he is able to write, he could post something on such a forum. It would be highly therapeutic, psychologically or even spiritually.

I had been a TRE/TRI before; power that is inherent in those positions can be very corruptive. I had to constantly remind myself to watch out for any ego trips, high handedness and treating others as any less competent. Being challenged by a checkee can be quite " challenging " and there are a few times when I found that the checkee was " more correct " than I was. It was very tempting to brush that aside and use the big stick; on reflection, I guess I subconscously knew that I am going to do myself more harm besides doing something humanly wrong if I were to succumb to that. This is especially so with non native English speakers who do not articulate their " challenges " very well so much so that it all seems a big affront to a checker who is native English speaking.

Archie... Very wise words.

As an instructor I have to be very careful as to what and how I say something. It's definitely challenging when you have a student who challenges something you say. You really need to know when to correct a student and when to learn from a student... Which is not always easy to see!

Alan & Archie..true words
I am seriously not a religious person, spiritual but not religious.
However:

Well said:ok:. in Mother India we do have a few of such fellas around. Whatever goes around comes around, possibly in another form. No sympathy here for such pieces of work about what they did, only compassion for their unvolved mentality. I guess they have forgotten about how to be a human being.

FFS.... What are you people on. Judging people on their death bed is a new low for PPrune......:ugh::ugh:

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone......

Nobody is judging Baba's mentor on his deathbed. We do not know the full details of his life, his good deeds as well as his possible trangressions. That Baba has good respect for him should be sufficient that he had something really good in his make up.

We are just discussing about people of his ilk possibly overwhelmed with the aura of power. All these discussions hopefully will open up the eyes of many who may be seduced by such tendencies.

All these must have hit something very close to home for you to be banging your head on the wall. Another trait of such individuals is their hyper sensitivity, taking offence at everything so much so that they just wantonly hit out at everything. Like Archie Archerfield wrote...

As I read it, the post seems to be about someone on his deathbed judging himself!

Indeed, as he is well entitled to. It's the 'sage' posts that follow that make me want to puke.

" sage " posts
 

" sage" posts? Oh oh looks like...............something is coming around! A case of these posts hitting home?

A thought. These people did not become like that in vacuum. I amnot saying, that a junior pilot who was being checked could do anything. But there were many senior guys around, who for sure saw, that something is wrong. We should fight back during checks, if we percieve something wrong. It is partially our, experienced pilots responsibility, that we allow people to grow into monsters, because we dont care or don't have the courage. But it will bite us back.

Ooo I'd be very careful about recommending check-ees to 'fight back' during a checkride. Especially when they 'perceive' something to be wrong.

We already have enough arrogant, ignorant and/or misinformed pilots (which is not necessarily the pilot's fault) out there that this is not a recommendation to just pass out. There are many things that you will be taught that could actually be wrong even though they make perfect sense to you. If you 'perceive' something to be wrong, DO NOT fight with your examiner. When the time is appropriate ask your examiner to explain what you didn't understand. The majority of the time your examiner will be correct. These usually come down to a misunderstanding but in any case, during the ride is not the place to be discussing how you think the examiner is wrong.

The way to 'fight back' is to talk to someone in a higher position that will listen to your complaint and take notice. When a number of people have complained about the same thing, something will be done. If nothing is being done, you're talking to the wrong person!

There are many such sorry characters abound. In another life with a major pacific rim carrier, I was forced to undergo a right hand seat simulator training in preparation to fly a a co pilot due to an impending strike by the locals. A very experienced Asian expat was on the left seat and in a simulated rejected takeoff whereby he had to take over from me and execute the maneuver; in a flash he correctedly accomplished the reject maneuver but I wasn't sure if I had accidently induced an abrupt movement during the handing over of controls which caused the simulator to lose control loading causing us to lose control going off the runway. The captain on the left told the Alteon checker that we had loss of control loading, but the checker just kept remarking that we botched the maneuver! The captain then told the checker to give another rejected take off exercise where he would show that in a quick RTO action, sometimes the sim just lost control loading.

After some argument and after the sim engineers had resetted the machine, the checker reluctantly gave another rejected takeoff which I had to conduct from the RHS. The captain told me to slam the thrust levers back abruptly, pull the speed brakes abruptly and pull the reversers with great force. True enough we lost control loading again. I couldn't believe my ears at what the checker said; he told us we were too rough on the controls and should execute the RTO gently and smoothly. I have alway approach RTO exercises aggressively where every nano seconds count. There were some grudging debriefing points after the session where upon the captain commented that the checker should be aware of such simulator phenomenon. The checker maintained that he never had such a situation before in a check and maintained that it was all our fault. The captain wasn't happy, taking the checker's assessment under protest.

Sometime later I had some recurrent traning with the same checker; he remembered the incident very well and kept on bad mouthing the captain. I even learned that he had even urged his fellow checkers to teach the captain "slitty eye smart alec" a good lesson. I then learned that the loss of face thingy did not apply to Asians but to Westerners too. Suffice to say I lost any enthusiasm to extend my contract when another opening came along.

We all try to hide the shameful stuff from getting to the open but this thread might just be the kind that opened a whole vat of worms, inconvenient truths that somehow needed to be addressed at one time or another.

Ah! The realm of the du witted, turn to insult when they have no intelligent reply.

The only thing these posts hit home is about how strangers on forums think they have the right to judge a dying man. I don't know what's shocks me more, the crass insensitivity of the OP posting the content of a private intimate conversation or the lines of self satisfying dribble spewed out by others.

We will all make mistakes during our lives. Some will be bigger than others. Personally I am trying to keep mine to the minimum prior to meeting my maker but just like anyone else on an aviation forum I am not qualified to grant absolution......

I think this thread is highly distasteful. If you want to discuss the merits if good and bad chech airmen or examiners in general open another thread rather than doing it lent over someone's grave.....

bose-x... if you find this thread distateful, please leave. Guilty pangs are hard to deal with, so the discussions here are are for the more evolved. Sweeping everything under the carpet and hoping to meet your maker with a clean slate is certainly a cop out. There is still a chance to grow and evolve even on your death bed.

I am a geriatric and was also an ex-check airman. There were instances whereby my checkees corrected me, especially when there were variations in items caused by aircraft differences or new procedures that were not that clear cut. As a checker I usually cleared my checkees in such instances unless there were items that seriously jeopardised the safety of the flight.

We all learnt from our checkees and hopefully, they from us. There were many instances whereby old habits and dogma led to " negative training ". It was my experience that many gung ho, kick ass A type personalities were guilty of such negative training.

I am not that far away from meeting my maker and I certainly take no offence at all regarding all the posts on this thread. I think they can serve as a pleasant nudge to wake up rather than a rude shuddering awakening for some of our more gung ho colleagues.

As for baba, please do go and see your old instructor. He has indeed made amends with his reflections and confessions. With you putting it here in the forum, his case certainly will hopefully awaken some to the errors of their ways. This itself, in a small way, is priceless. Good luck and fair winds.

"The unexamined life is not worth living."
 

-the quote suggests that Socrates' belief that a human who does not examine (in every sense of the term) their own life, nature, reality, relationships, motivations, and thoughts, is wasting the experience, therefore such a life is not worth living.

I'm just sayin'..!

Gleneagles, you are probably a rare gem in the midst of all the pseudo skygods. This thread surely hit home right on the solar plexi of many and you can imagine the discomfort of these chaps on reading it here!

Death bed confessions are probably good for the soul; I had a cousin who confided in me that one really see one's whole life history pass before one's very eyes. He had a ruptured appendix with sepsis setting in, he was almost a goner. After the NDE, he was a changed man..no more the kick ass supremo that he used to be. One more secret he let in on me...he is his own judge, jury and executioner! Food for thought.

Well, I always maintained when FOs came to me and said "so and so is horrible to fly with ", that they were w**kers before they got 2 stripes, then w**kers with 3, 4 so on. Nothing changes.

As for TREs, they can be split into 2 categories - those with massive experience who want to pass that on, and those who collect ratings because it boosts their ego.

I did once want to be an examiner, but now I feel flying takes up enough of my life without extra stuff to study..

It's always never too late to make amends when you are still alive. There are certainly many ways where past wrongs can be righted.

I once pointed out something about an unfair performance report and was harshly berated for it. I lost a chance for a scholarship on account of it. Some years later, the person responsible for it showed up at an alumni reunion to apologize indicating that he deeply regretted his biased action. He showed me his recent action at redressing the wrong...he got it expunged from my records and sought the permission of the varsity senate to amend my grade. To accomplish this he certainly went through a lot of trouble if not grief. Though I will never ever get that scholarship again and life could have been quite different, he had done good to atone for his rashness. I have certainly forgiven him, but I will not forget his action and I will continue to watch out for people of his ilk.

Whoa, alanusa...harakiri? Sepukku? Gee, don't you think that's a tad too harsh. I too was guilty of failing somebody once because I thought he was a bit below par. Later in the week upon reflection as I reviewed the past week's checkrides, I realised that I might have factored in his " seemingly bad attitude " into his failing grade. I had a chat with the Chief Pilot ( Training ) who also advised that that previous check TREs had found this checkee to be a bit " hyper " and unconsciously exhibited " bad attitude " when under stress. I reviewed with the Chief Pilot his performance during the check and after some exhaustive deliberations I conceded that he deserved a poor grade but not a fail. The higher ups ( in coordination with our CAA ) graciously allowed me ( it was still my call ) to amend the grade to a pass and his recheck was cancelled.

The upshot? I felt good for the checkee and myself. The downside? Rumours abound that I was given a huge dressing down by the VPs and chief pilots, that I was summarily sacked. That I was toast, that I grovelled and was given back my post after stern warnings, etc. None of those were true, but well as someone said...cest le vie!

Babablackship, please do pluck up some visceral fortitude and give your former mentor all the support he needs at this crucial stage of his life. He needs to be at peace before crossing over. A suggestion; as far as I know, most orientals take the adversity brought about by actions such as his in their stride and I am sure all of his victims have moved on. His guilty pangs and uncomfortable reflections indicate a level of spiritual evolvement and progress which stand him in good stead when he crosses over. I guess most of his victims more or less expected such things from him and had factored that as a " learning experience " and knowing about his present predicament will be very magnanimous in forgving him.

Gerago....bravo and I salute your Training chief pilot for having an open mind and taking it up with your higher ups to allow you to amend that grade of your checkee. It takes moral courage and great sense of responsibility.

Totally agree that there are always opportunities to make things right. I had a relative who came over last X'mas to apologise for some of his past actions who caused a rift in the family. He looked so old, had a heart bypass and when undergoing GA for the procedure he somehow had an epiphany which triggered his desire to set things right.

Too bad my late father is not around to receive the apologies but I can accept it, putting some closure to the issue. I guess baba's mentor still have the time to do so.

Threads that are good food for thoughts
 

This thread should make an interesting read here:

http://www.pprune.org/fragrant-harbo...lures-row.html

20 years ago on a small fleet in big company we had two checkers of opposite personality.
One a true gentleman and tutor. The other a vindictive troll.
The nasty one felt he had been hard done-by by the company and duly took it out on his checkee's.
After a check ride with first fellow, l asked why he was so pleasant, thorough and assisted with any 'grey' areas with fairness, the complete opposite of his colleague.
His response was straight forward enough..."One day you may be my check-captain!"

halas

It`s at least commendable that your friend has expressed some kind of regret, even if it is too late to undo what was done. It`s never too late to say sorry if it is sincere and if that can help him find some peace before he passes on it will be worthwhile. Perhaps a letter or open letter would be a cathartic and effective means of communicating his regrets.

Perhaps you read this uplifting news in recent days-

US cancer victim uses obituary to confess sins - Telegraph

Sitting on an interview panel for a fully-sponsored ab-initio airline training program a few years ago, I inexcusably succumbed to groupthink fuelled by one very senior bullying 'skygod', in adding my casting vote against a perfectly sound, indeed truly excellent candidate.

I'll never forget the look of sadness in her eyes as she took the news on board, quietly gathered her things and left the room. To my immediate discomfort and regret she even said "thank you all for the opportunity".

I sought her out in the lobby to offer some words of consolation, try again on the next round, blah, blah... She bit her lip and said I can't, my birthday's next week, I'll be past the age cut off, it was my one chance, i could never afford the training. She gave me a tearful smile, a ladylike goodbye, and headed off.

While I ruefully pondered having wrecked this kid's dream of flight, I could hear the skygod's laughter coming down the corridor, chortling no doubt at one of his own jokes before the largely fawning group.

"Never f****** again", I promised myself.

justanotherflyer...oh dear that is absolutely terrible, truly sad and regrettable. I have always advised my copilot and junior colleagues against pack behaviour or groupthink as you have it.:sad:

When things like this happened, it is lways not easily reversed. Some poor guy's life gets ruined and one has years of agonising regret unless they are real pieces of work like that skygod you mentioned. I am sure you can find ways to set things right like find other airlines with comparable sponsored ab initio programmes.:)

Chuck:

Know the chap you are talking about. Not a bad bloke on the ground, but we had a saying about some guys. "Great guy to drink a pint with but when they cross the threshold of the aircraft and you pressurize them, something changes." I believe your analysis is spot on.

Well said Akali , speaking of India there is a healthy mix of Indian and Expat angels of death trainers.I've seen some of them and they can truly kill a pilot. Met an old friend of mine and heard that there was an expat TRE who we knew who had a stint in India or is still there if I'm not mistaken.Dubious credentials created havoc in the Far East and did the same in India I heard.Well what goes around comes around.:ok:

Very good story!...I try to self examine an atone, as best as I can...I'm far from perfect

Re: the cancer victim's story, why can't I have a 'paperwork error' never went for the PhD...:{...tired of lectures...:)

I hate to sound heartless but as is said what you reap you shall sow and karma...when I said very good story...I meant good as in illustrative not a 'good story'...it is sad...but it's also sad that he ruined those airmen's careers out of racism...when you do such things you get paid back in spades...sorry!

I know how racism can really make like difficult---I'm a mixed Latino and I've suffered employment discrimination as a result and left a good job...but I don't like being called a monkey or being told that I don't speak spanish that I speak Puerto-Rican...and of course being treated accordingly...it's hard to feel much sympathy...he has to reconcile his predjudiced and hateful actions with God now...I was hesitant about posting this but I feel something should be said...once again---sorry!

Personally speaking, I can recommend living by that excellent, well-proven, and wise motto, attributed to that great genius, Anonymous .....

"Be careful whose toes you step on today - because they might be connected to the foot that kicks your ass tomorrow .... "

Babablackship, it must be saddening to see someone on his deathbed undergoing such regrets and personal ass-kicking, over behaviour he now acknowledges was wrong.
I think we have all been in that position to a certain extent. However, to be in a position where you can ruin anothers career via a derogatory assessment is indeed a very powerful position to be in.
However, the story of the world is of millions of peoples careers being ruined by powerful people exerting powerful forces. Nothing has changed since time began.

Perhaps your best approach to your friends self-flaggellation is to let him know that those whose careers he ruined may not see things the same way he does now - and the passage of time most certainly dulls the edge of deep cuts.

As one whose life was ruined, and whose 30 year asset accumulation was totally destroyed, by one callous person in a position of great power over me - I can assure you that the initial rage of grossly unfair (and illegal) treatment does not usually linger for decades, in the average person.

We move on, and put the poor treatment behind us, and find another life. I'd suggest that you advise your friend, that those he mistreated have also done the same - and possibly do not now regard the poor treatment that they received at his hands, with a continuing aim to exact revenge.

In fact, he may find that some of his poorly-treated underlings may completely shrug off the treatment that they received at his hands, and they may advise him that they went on to better and bigger things, in a different field.

Onetrack I hear you, and agree but clipping a pilot's wings is a horrible thing to do-perhaps this is justice...sorry!

Life will be fine if you just follow this:

St.Mark 12 Vs 30 , 31....You must love the Lord your God with all your heart,all your soul,all your mind and all your strength.The second equally important: Love your neighbour as yourself.No other commandment is greater than these.

One day we shall meet our Creator and give account for our actions.Will we be found wanting ?Watch out !!!:ok::cool::confused:

It appears that many people suffer from bitter regrets upon their deathbed, so this friend of babablackships isn't alone. After reflecting upon this post, I remembered one particular nurses story.

As a palliative care nurse, she spent much time with people unloading their regrets onto her. She ended up writing a book about the subject, called "The Top Five Regrets of the Dying".

The book won't help babablackships mate much, but it sure is a good guide on how to live your life, to minimise regrets when you get old.

Here's the link to her blog. I don't think I've read so many home truths in one webpage.

Inspiration and Chai

The fact that babablackships mate is afflicted with terminal cancer is not unusual. I firmly believe that many cancers are incurred via internalising deep bitterness, anger and hatred.
The old saying "what's eating you?" has more than a passing basis in fact. People who are permanently angry, harbour constant bitterness, and carry hatred with them daily, generally end up burning out rapidly, as their anger and bitterness eats at them.

Babablackship - SWMBO thought up an interesting action. She suggested that your mate write letters to the blokes he wronged, and pour out his apologies to them. Then he could try and locate them, and send the letters to them.

Even if he can't find them, or the letters don't reach them, he may find a degree of personal satisfaction in knowing that he tried to address his wrongdoing before he parts the veil.