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monkeys

Old 12th June 2001 | 07:09
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helodriver
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Post monkeys

Serious question. Does anyone know of any research/experiments where someone tried to teach monkeys to fly?
 
Old 12th June 2001 | 16:30
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Angle of Attack
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Unhappy

This is severly asking for numerous non-serious answers. But apart from the monkeys which were sent to space, which I gather did'nt really have any input, I don't recall seeing anything like that. I think it would be pretty difficult to get any productive results out of it. I mean some humans struggle badly let alone monkeys.....but its a good idea if you want to get rid of all the old C150's around, send the monkeys solo!
 
Old 12th June 2001 | 18:09
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RVR800
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Wink

Has a monkey ever driven a car before ?



 
Old 12th June 2001 | 18:23
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Honest Frank
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Often thought to myself - sometimes it would be easier to teach a baboon to fly rather than some of the muppets that turned up for trial lessons?????


 
Old 13th June 2001 | 12:47
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juswonnafly
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Talking

I get paid peanuts......do I qualify?

 
Old 13th June 2001 | 19:16
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dingducky
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Question

what was the name of that movie?

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Old 13th June 2001 | 20:36
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Night Rider
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Honest Frank,

I know the feeling.

(I often wonder how some of them managed to drive to the airport!)

Still, I guess it puts the money in the till.

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Old 13th June 2001 | 22:47
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theRolfe2
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I don't know anything about Monkey's being taught to fly but I do know that the US Military spent significant amounts of time teaching Alsations to make parachute jumps.

This may sound stange but it was the late 50's when among other things they were researching -

Exploding Frisbees (nasty tendency to slide backwards to the thrower)
Making soldiers braver with LSD (kept running away from imaginary monsters)
The "Davy Crockett" Handlaunched Nuclear Device (1 Mile range)

...So the idea of getting dogs to skydive is actually quite sane by the standards of the time.

They took military German Shepards (Alsations) and trained them to jump through a door while wearing a static line parachute on their backs. After leaving the plane the static line would open the parachute automaticly, leaving the dog to descend earthwards where it would presumably terrify the enemy. After someone let it out of the parachute harness.

All went well initially - the first stick of dogs was dispatched successfully.

The problem was that after their first jump they developed an extreme aversion to aircraft. Maybe it was because they'd only been trained to jump through a door onto the ground, so finding themselves 500ft up in the air must have unnerved them.

theRolfe

[This message has been edited by theRolfe2 (edited 13 June 2001).]
 
Old 13th June 2001 | 22:48
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Honest Frank
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And the hours in the bag Night Rider.
 
Old 14th June 2001 | 00:36
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Squawk 8888
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Dingducky, you're probably thinking about the line "I could teach monkeys to fly better than that" from Battle of Britain.

Rolfe2, your story reminds me of an experiment by the Soviets to train dogs to blow up enemy tanks. They trained the dogs to pick up mines with their mouths, then run under a tank, drop the mine and run back out. It wasn't until they turned them lose on the battlefield that they realized the should've trained the dogs using German tanks as targets

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Per dementia ad astra
 
Old 14th June 2001 | 20:49
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Capt L
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Yeah Dinky,

I think I know the one you're talking about, is it the one where at the end Virgil pinches the Cessna, and escapes with all his little monkey friends to the jungle. Thinking about it now, was it called Project X??


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Old 14th June 2001 | 21:29
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theRolfe2
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Now I think of it there was an attempt to get Monkeys to use Parachutes.

They were testing a new design and didn't want to risk it on a human so they used a chimp. It was just as well they did because 50ft from the ground the canopy collapsed and the thing dropped to the ground killing the chimp. They tried again with a fresh chimp and the exact same thing happened.

On the 3rd attempt they were using binoculars and realized that as the chimp approached the group it got ground rush (the reason why parachutists don't look down!). The normal human reaction to seeing the ground approaching at a threatening rate is to bring ones knees up to ones chest, which is a sure way to break both legs.

Chimpanzees don't lift their knees up to their chest. They attempt to climb upwards away from 'danger'. They start to go up the rigging lines to the top of the parachute. By putting their entire weight on a couple of lines on one side they make the parachute collapse....

theRolfe

[This message has been edited by theRolfe2 (edited 14 June 2001).]
 
Old 15th June 2001 | 00:27
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Sleeve Wing
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Sure you can teach monkeys to fly !!

All it takes is 240 volts or a banana !!!!

 
Old 16th June 2001 | 22:59
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dingducky
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Cool

nope never seen the battle of britain

i think the movie had someone like matthew broderick in it
they would stick the monkeys in like a flight sim
and i think they exposed them to radiation or something coz they tended to die

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A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
 

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