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Microsoft Tv Dinner Instructions

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Microsoft Tv Dinner Instructions

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Old 25th Jul 2003, 03:34
  #1 (permalink)  

Plastic PPRuNer
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Cool Microsoft Tv Dinner Instructions

You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to accept and honour Microsoft rights to all TV dinners. You may not give anyone else a bite of your dinner (which would constitute an infringement of Microsoft's rights). You may, however, let others smell and look at your dinner and are encouraged to tell them how good it is.

If you have a PC microwave oven, insert the dinner into the oven. Set the oven using these keystrokes: \mstv.dinn.//08.5min@50%heat// .

Then enter ms//start.cook_dindin/yummy\l/yum~yum-) gohot#cookme

If you have a Mac oven, insert the dinner and press start. The oven will set itself and cook the dinner.

If you have a Unix oven, insert the dinner, enter the ingredients of the dinner (found on the package label), the weight of the dinner, and the desired level of cooking and press start. The oven will calculate the time and heat and cook the dinner exactly to your specification.

Be forewarned that Microsoft dinners may crash, in which case your oven must be restarted. This is a simple procedure. Remove the dinner from the oven and enter ms.nodamn.good/tryagain\again.again.crap

This process may have to be repeated. Try unplugging the microwave and then doing a cold reboot. If this doesn't work, contact your hardware vendor.

Many users have reported that the dinner tray is far too big, larger than the dinner itself, having many useless compartments, most of which are empty. These are for future menu items. If the tray is too large to fit in your oven you will need to upgrade your equipment.

Dinners are only available from registered outlets, and only the chicken variety is currently produced. If you want another variety, call Microsoft Help and they will explain that you really don't want another variety. Microsoft Chicken is all you really need.

Microsoft has disclosed plans to discontinue all smaller versions of their chicken dinners. Future releases will only be in the larger family size. Excess chicken may be stored for future use, but must be saved only in Microsoft approved packaging.

Microsoft promises a dessert with every dinner after '98. However, that version has yet to be released. Users have permission to get thrilled in advance. Microsoft dinners may be incompatible with other dinners in the freezer, causing your freezer to self-defrost. This is a feature, not a bug. Your freezer probably should have been defrosted anyway.
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Old 25th Jul 2003, 19:22
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Bwah ha ha ha!


You forgot:


If you bought a Microsoft dinner before this one then you must discard the old one even if it still looks, smells & tastes fine.

Last edited by Tinstaafl; 26th Jul 2003 at 06:22.
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Old 25th Jul 2003, 23:08
  #3 (permalink)  
Dream Coder
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Beautiful absolutely beautiful.

Very humerous indeed.

I was going to send it off to a bunch of people I used to know at Microsoft but I can't seem to find their email addresses as they've suddenly been wiped off my Win2k pc.

But I will however send it to all my friEnDs.... at...

Hey, I seem to be having a problem in MSIE 6, ACK!...

WindoZe Slo w i n g . Why CanT I ty p e with THis MicroSOfT KeyBord. . . Any Mor.... HElP!!!... LosiNG conTRol...


WHAT I MEANT TO SAY WAS WINDOWS IS GREAT,
I LOVE ALL MICROSOFT PRODUCTS!
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUR SELF YOUNG MAN!!!
Ridley is offline  

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