Agent Mulder

Black Ban Joyce

Imagine if the following scenario occurred:

Morning flight to Sydney from Melbourne at the gate ready for departure.

Seated in 1A is a little man travelling under the name of Joyce Mr A. Suddenly over the P.A. comes the dulcet tone of the overpaid under worked uncompetitive Captain:

“Ladies and Gentlemen welcome aboard your CityFlyer service this morning, my name is Captain I’m Speaking and I have the pleasure of flying you to your destination. Assisting me today is First Officer I’m Listening and our multi award winning Cabin Crew led by Customer Service Manager Ms. Despite Management.

We have completed all of our pre-flight formalities and are ready to depart however we seem to have located a small problem. We, the crew, value your custom as I am sure you value the quality of service you receive.

We have, however, in our midst an individual who has taken delight in attacking the professional standards by which we operate. The passenger in seat 1A, in an attempt to justify the salaries and conditions of his employees, has used the media to attack the conditions under which I convey you to your destination today. This despite the fact that he earns in excess of one million dollars per annum and my meagre salary should be the least of his concerns.

The level of animosity in his constant ranting has left me with no other option than to consider him a risk to the safe operation of this aircraft. His vitriol in the press has shown that he has an intrinsic dislike of Qantas Aircrew (both tech and cabin) and as such I cannot expose you, our customers, to the possibility of him being a disruptive passenger in his pursuit of his all elusive bonus.

To that end, I will not be departing this aeroplane until such time as Mr. Joyce disembarks. Should Mr. Joyce wish to travel to Sydney by other means there is a flight leaving Avalon in approximately one hour. YOU HAVE THIRTY MINUTES TO CHECK IN. I am sure that you will feel much safer with your competitive employees than with us here today.

We are sorry to have inconvenienced you.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I appreciate your patience whilst we disembark this potentially disruptive passenger, and trust that your confidence in us remains unwavering. It is our pleasure to have you onboard.

Please sit back, relax, and enjoy the QANTAS service.”

aircraft

Extremely unlikely scenario. The Captain would be sacked but the flight would go ahead (if a bit late).

And I'm sure that more than a few passengers would express something along the lines of "Huh? What was all that about? Our Captain sounds like a raving loony! Let's get off this flight!"

Buster Hyman

...Just then, Jack Bauer pops up out of the cabin floor and...

Vee Won Kutt

...with champagne in one hand and a gun in the other, heads straight for Ms. Despite, who.......

Agent Mulder

Never underestimate the public dislike of Executives and their million dollar salaries.

Sacked heh! The ramifications would be extremely detrimental to Executive Bonuses and 66% increases in salary. Be funny to watch the roll up at the friday afternoon "Golf Man". Need four hours for the tee offs. And a bigger fuel truck for all flights. Threats are ineffective against those legally charged with command. Try it though, be great to watch the outcome. (Remember many people learnt from 89 not just the current Exec and their greenfield man).

Off tangent. Anyone know why James (bowtie) was invited by Margaret to join the Board without Geoff's knowledge?

Word is that the recruiting process is well underway for the next CEO and it isn't internal. Maybe someone with significant experience in turning Companies around and re-engaging (dreadful word) employees is what is sought.

Wondered why Gregg is getting some press courtesy of Dixon? Wondered why another in the running doesn't seem to agree with the direction being taken all of a sudden?

May we live in interesting times?

Agent Mulder

... points at the gnome in seat 1A and says .......

Point0Five

It almost seems like they're trying to set up a leisure airline as opposed to a business one.

woftam

Maybe that's why GD and AJ have gone for the "I'm so cool" no tie and jacket look?

hoss

yeah, whats with those photographs of Dixon at the 'oneworld do' and in the group picture Dixon is the only CEO not wearing a tie. totally embarassing and the clown should be shot .

Baxter Dewall

Hoss, spot on mate.

God forbid if you were to walk out the the a/c without one's cap or didn't have one's wings attached to one's shirt. Tea and bikkies with TM.

What a load of . Talk about not looking at the big picture here!

But that's ok as all is now fixed because the EBA got up. What problems, there are no problems here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Baxter

Pass-A-Frozo

I think you should say :

"oh.. and ladies and gentlemen..when I say meagre salary. I mean I only earn around $180,000 per annum. That's right.. probably 3 times the salary of most you"

air med

agent mulder
Do you work for JS???

Eagleman

Surely if Mr Joyce is true to his product, he would be on JQ

But, if he had to fly QF, surely he would travel economy?

Cloud Basher

... stop touching me Mr Joyce...

J430

Gents, just an observation, and I agree that much of the bitching here is casued by execs attitudes, but I notice that if they don't wear a tie they get bashed, and if like James Strong did, he gets bashed.........what does one do?

Cheers
J

Buster Hyman

I think James Strong would have endeared himself to many if that Bow Tie spun a little...or squirted water.

ContactMeNow

After having the opportunity to have dinner with "old mate" AJ once, the question arose as to why he chooses not to wear a tie. His response was somewhere along the lines of "the relaxed looked" and then he went on to say that the flying publis will see that the CEO's (implying himself and GD) are not all up themselves and they are human as well. Plus going for that look will make the punlis feel that the airline is alot more accommodating.

On a side note he likes to have a few and loves his red!

CMN

hoss

sure, but in a business environment where a dozen or so Airline CEOs are gathered I would expect a the wearing of a suit and tie(or bow tie ).

something about 'when in Rome.............'.

domo

the reason he may not wear a tie may be security
nothing for a disgruntled employee/former employee to hold on to

Pass-A-Frozo

However , back to the topic

How do you get public support when you are complaining about either only earning something around $180,000 a year, or your pay not being increase (or lowered)?

Mr Moore took exception to the pay of pilots. However correct me if I'm wrong, he took exception to earing $23,000 US a year or something similar.

I seriously doubt anyone in the public would be rallying behind someone earning around $180,000 a year or more. People complain about managers in other industries earning far less than that.

Pilots (at the top scale) are well paid.. I don't think any average person on the street would support pilot's earning that much.. especially if QANTAS took the route of stating "If we could lower senior captain pay to $140K , we could lower ticket prices further. Of course most pilots will think "Well the ticket price won't be lower" .. however threads about Low Cost / Low price airlines would prove otherwise.

Thoughts?