Wasn't this phraseology banned after it was found that it had contributed to the death of 500+ people ?

It was, after the KLM/Pan-Am Disaster.

Amsterdam , request rwy 06 to avoid
"to avoid what?" (weather is cavok)
to avoid the polderbaan..(18R)
(big laughter following by roger cleared direct)

Refreshment on the simulator:

DHL123: "Mayday mayday mayday, radar, DHL123 lost engine number one."
ATC: "Mayday approved"

Don't get it.

If you look at a map of Schiphol, you can see that 18R is kinda very far out from the other runways and the terminals.
Longer taxiing etc.

Polderbaan
 

Understatement of the year - Polderbaan may well already be in Belgium :zzz:

Belgium?? Your map is a bit off....more like the third runway at Heathrow!:E

Ghost riders in the sky
 

"............and how many on board?"

"None"

While doing my ppl(h) and starting using the radio on my own - requesting hover taxi to the heli strip

A/c - requesting lift-off and hover taxi to heli strip two six, g-**
Atc - g-** lift-off approved, runway 26, fly me to the moon!

Instructor laughing

This happened during my initial flight training in Kissimmee, Florida. On tower frequency about to make a VRP call to rejoin and land but someone beats me to it...


A/C (middle-eastern modular student): Kissimme Tower, N**** at the sand pits with the AWOS, inbound full stop landing

TWR: Roger N****, report at the water towers for runway 33 left hand

A/C: Report at the twin towers for 33 left hand, N****

-brief silence-

TWR: Ok...


Me and my instructor cringed at this very un-pc error!

"Student G-****, confirm your level"

"Confirm I'm level"

American Pilot: "Woah. (pause). Woah woah woah woah!!!! (yelling) Did you see that?"
Some London ATC: "Affirm"

Pilot: "He was way too close!"
ATC: "Would you like to upgrade to a traffic service?"

Pilot: "How about a 'I don't wanna hit anyone else' kinda service?"
ATC: "We have a deconfliction service but there are too many contacts in your area to deconflict you from them."

Pilot: "Can you just give me the best service you have?"
ATC: "I can only give you a limited traffic service due to controller workload and multiple contacts observed in your area. Unfortunately that means late or no warning of traffic."

Pilot: "All right. But this is reallll scaaary noww!"

Brilliant :ok: Gonna offer that to somone the day I retire & see what happens ! ;)

I recently asked for "first class"
 

got a laugh but not a better service.

glf

then there is the old Brize service.

"request type of service required"

"the normal !!!! one will do"

One herk pilot in a whole heap of trouble once on the ground.

ATC: "XXX107 essential aerodrome information, geese observed to be crossing the climbout, this time, south to north."

Pilot: Ahh yes sir, we have the traffic on TCAS.

RRRR heheheh lllllyyy

ATC: Essential aerodrome information, flock of geese observed crossing the climbout out for runway 28, south to north.

Pilot: Ahh yes sir, we have the ttraffic on TCAS.

Really!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not strictly ATC but heard this conversation between 2 Quantas F/C and small Thai dispatcher at the newly opened Bangkok airport walking down depp gates. "So we have been to gate XX and gate XX and now gate XX with no 777 on any of them let alone a Quantas one. Have you any idea where you have put my aircraft !" Made me smile as I was playing hunt the EK lounge with one of the Thai airport staff at the time, who also seemed unaware of where that was as well !. :O

Be very hard to find a Qantas 777 I think!