Dear Southend controller...

[digital.poet]

Just incase the Southend controller or anyone who was on the Southend frequency at around 1PM today happens to read this board, you may have heard a transmission that went something like this... (callsign changed to protect the..... erm guilty)

Me: Southend Radar, Golf-Alpha-Bravo-Charlie-Delta, Request Flight information service.

Southend: Golf-Alpha-Bravo-Charlie-Delta, pass your message.

Me: Golf-Alpha-Bravo-Charlie-Delta, Cessna 172, Headcorn - Southend - Damyns Hall - Headcorn, 2 miles east of Gillingham, 2300 feet on QNH 1030, errmm..... ummmmm sorry.... *click*

I just want you to know that I *am* trying, and I can do this stuff pretty well when I am at 0 feet AGL, but as soon as I push that little black button you might as well ask me to recite the elements in the periodic table.... alphabetically..... in hebrew.

Sorry if I made your job harder then it needs to be today, I promise you that some day I will come by, and get it spot on and you will say... "Wow! That guy is a pilot!!"

Thanks.

[julian_storey]

We've all been there

On all the occasions I've been into Southend, the controllers there have always seemed pretty friendly. I'm sure that they will have understood.

[HeliCraig]

All been there! Might be worth asking a Mod to move (or cross post) this thread into the ATC forum as well!

[TractorBoy]

I see the mistake. It should have been "Saaaafend Radar"

Don't worry. Happens to us all. When doing my cross-country qualifier, I started talking in what appeared to be Gibberish to London Info. I think the bloke on the other end started losing patience as well....

[Redbird72]

I know exactly how you feel - the minute I push that little black button, my brain turns to mush and my tongue doesn't work! The funny part is watching my FI desperately miming what I should be saying ...

Fortunately, there are four schools at sarfend, so they're probably used to us!

[JBGA]

I was once flying in the South East with a friend and we called Dunsfold radar who acknowledged us and blurted out the usual stream of info (QNH, squawk code etc.) We hurriedly wrote it all down, dialled the numbers in to the instruments etc. After a short delay the response came back from the controller....

'Golf Alpha Bravo you appear to be squawking the QNH'

Although the radio was silent I could hear the whole world laughing. Looking down at the transponder, sure enough it had 1013 dialled in! If only we'd tried getting 7890mb in to the altimeter we might have twigged!!

[45 before POL]

trying to get 7890 into the transponder would have been even harder

[agent007]

Southend

Keep practising its not that easy at first.
007

[kwachon]

Many years ago I called "Downhill" in the circuit at LYDD

[matspart3]

I spoke to my first 'real' aeroplane as a trainee controller at Southend............it's just as nerve racking from that end of the mike!!

The advice I give to all students is to not wait until you're in the aeroplane (and paying £xxx per hour) to practice your RT. If you commit the standard words and phrases and the mandatory readback items to memory, it does all slot into place eventually.

[Atcham Tower]

JBGA, don't worry about it. I have had quite a few airline professionals get airborne squawking their slot time!

[Fly Through]

my favourite is a fellow controller under training and under pressure.....

"Speedbird 357, squeak ident....err....ummm...."

now one of LTCC's best.

[rsuggitt]

To say nothing of a EGGW controller I once heard accidentally transmitting a personal phone conversation......

[luvly jubbly]

I once knew a guy who just prior to transiting a MATZ, asked the female radar controller for MAX penetration!


And how many pilots have done the entire passenger welcoming PA over the RT...... I haven't..............YET!!

LJ