View Full Version : Class 1 Schlong !!!!
Had my Class 1 Medical today with a different DAME, for the first time in 14 years the DAME wanted to check out the Old Fella.
Is this new procedure? or Have the other DAME's just not been bothered with this in the past? or Have I been checked out by some pervert?
What has my Old Fella got to do with flying, apart from overnights? and How do they check out Aviatrix (females)?
Oh well, hoss
Hugh Jarse
6th Dec 2002, 08:20
Hey Hoss, he wasn't an old bloke that used to work out of Illawarra was he? He took a look at my Schwanzstucker as well :D Initials "P.C." for the politically correct.
He also told me that if I didn't give up the coffee I'd fail my medical by age 35. That was a few years ago.
I just found anothe D.A.M.E. coz I didn't feel comfortable with him :eek:
But don't go to the "fully qualified Empire Test Pilot" G.M. either. (He'll tell you all his aviation qualifications whether you want to know or not :rolleyes: ).
He's just another frustrated pilot that will do whatever he can to fail you. But he won't tell you to your face. You'll have to wait until you ring CASA Medical to find out why your certificate hasn't arrived :mad:
If you live on the Northside, I can highly recommend a bloke at Lane Cove who is actually interested in your health. Email me for the details ;)
beer bong
6th Dec 2002, 11:11
My doc reckoned he needed to put his finger up my @rse. I told him where to go.
I know we sometimes take it in the arse in this game beer but thats just where you gotta draw the line!
With my 'friendly' DAME you get the fairly standard grab ya love spuds and cough drill, thats stretching the friendship enough I feel !
Perhaps he was checking out to see if his was bigger hoss ? :p
Hugh I always ask if I have passed before signing
the form so if you failed and I haven't yet and
don't sign the medical didn't happen, go get a second opinion. Cheers Q :)
TIMMEEEE
6th Dec 2002, 20:14
Hoss - did you stop to consider that he was just checking that you were actually a guy and had the requisite tackle?
(just kidding pal).
As for the finger up the date, a good GP (who can subsequently save your life) should do a prostate examination as a matter of course for adult males over 40 years of age.
My uncle who is in his fifties changed doctors, had an examination and is now being treated for prostate cancer which was diagnosed early due to a thorough medical professional.
Anyway, the guys I associate with probably object to having a finger thrust up your hairy datehole but to checkout your old fella?
Rich-Fine-Green
6th Dec 2002, 23:00
Hoss;
He's only a pervert if he didn't put rubber gloves on before the examining the ol' Blue Vein Bandit.
:D :D
RYAN TCAD
7th Dec 2002, 00:29
LOL :) - i don't know about the date hole mate, but i'd tell him to F'OFF and go down to Oxford street if he wants that!!!!
As for having a look at the old fella, my DAME does not want to look at the old fella, but he does with glove on hand - whilst i'm lying down, place a finger just under the scrotum and ask me to cough. This is because he's actually checking to see if i have a hernia.
So, maby your DAME was only checking for that, but that should be it and only that.
If in doubt, ring CASA DAME number 1 on 131757 and ask him what they should and should not be doing, because they should be following CASA guidelines.
Sounds like the odd DAME has got the lines blurred after reading a few of the previous posts!! :) :)
Cheers!
maximus
7th Dec 2002, 05:09
There was a DAME at Coolangatta whose nickname was "strawb" who used to give the orchestra's a bit of a jiggle at medical time. Asked him why and he said he was checking for testicular cancer. Said he had only ever found one case of it but I guess it probably saved the blokes life.
Old "strawbs" dead now but he was a good Doc. who cared about his patients. :)
high talker
7th Dec 2002, 09:27
I've never had a problem with the DAME i see. Hes never had a feel down there. Just wonder if any women DAME's out there what are their thoughts on the issue. Im sure there would be some scary old fellers out there.
Elk McPherson
7th Dec 2002, 11:42
Have had a lady doctor thoroughly check me out for Jatz Cancer, but was back at her place after our first date so was OK. Was a bit confronting when she declared the extent of my good health to my Mother on their first meeting however.
My G.P./DAME checks for inguinal hernias - in the canal between your lower abdomen and upper thigh. Speaking as a qualified Ambo officer, if he checks under your scroat (in an area called your perineum) you might ask him what he's looking for.
Perhaps he is just being polite for the sake of the Aero Club bar on Firsay night... or...
...perhaps perineal hernias are something new??? I have never come across them before (if you'll excuse the expression).
Wombat
7th Dec 2002, 12:53
TIMMEEEE,
As for the finger up the date, make sure the doctor does not have both his hands on your shoulders whilst he is conducting the check.
:D
Wombat
mustafagander
8th Dec 2002, 04:22
When I first saw the title of this thread I assumed it referred to a certain regional pilot. His equipment looks somewhat similar to a baby's arm holding an orange!!
He has a bad habit of dropping it on the bar after a few too many beers. :eek:
Hugh Jarse
8th Dec 2002, 08:57
Because he can. :D
And always the life of the party, that lad ;)
TIMMEEEE
9th Dec 2002, 20:53
Wombat - its cool dude.
I've stopped seeing that DAME on Oxford St!
But at least he warms his finger first.
What ......they're supposed to wear gloves you say?!!!!
RYAN TCAD
10th Dec 2002, 10:09
Say, - who's got a number for a hot looking female DAME in Sydney. Now i wouldn't mind what she wants to look for....!!!!
THREEGREENS
11th Dec 2002, 04:14
You guys have got me thinking. I've been using the same DAME for the past 20 years and he always checks out the old ring-gear but is it right that he uses his TONGUE???????:rolleyes:
I must give a big high five to those who replied to this post..............frickin hilarious !
PLovett
13th Dec 2002, 04:05
It might be frickin hilarious to some but I've got my medical on Monday! :( :eek: :confused:
JULIET WHISKEY
17th Dec 2002, 05:12
Had my nuts checked with the quacks bare hands!!!
He then proceeded the shake the hand of the next patient as he came through the door as I was leaving , No sign of had wash to be had.
Only of concern if you are in the Redcliffe area in QLD.
As for Crowley ,thoroughly enjoyed his conversations on the Polititians and the clergy........
Transition Layer
17th Dec 2002, 08:04
Got my Class 1 tomorrow - must make a mental note to give the old fella an extra special wash!
C.....Y - yep that was his name. Couldn't remember who P.C. was, but yes, C.....Y in the office next to Illawara! Otherwise known as Doctor Death! Remember him well. First time I saw him I couldn't help but think of the wild-eyed ambulance driver in 'The Cannonball Run.' Medicals used to be entertaining, but I don't think I ever suffered any fingers where they didn't ought to be, or the old cold hand in the crotch and cough routine. Not from him anyhow! And I think his Austrian wife just used to add to the entertainment value.
compressor stall
24th Dec 2002, 03:41
My last medical cost me twenty-one cents per second!
:eek:
Wish I earned that flying!