The newspaper has a long way to go with its spell-checkers and missing words to even reach a third-world standard.
Ohhh, lapun mama, yu got bikpela yau tumas! Wanem olsem? Olsem long look-look long yu, Liklik Retpela Hat.*
*Oh, grandma, what big eyes you have!
All the better to see you with, Little Red Riding Hood.