PS Thanks for the contacts to clubs and so on that various people have posted - I'll follow those up if I decide to proceed with learning. The overall weight of opinion is adding to the arguments for not attempting to go it alone, but as I said in another reply elsewhere the conventional route will have to wait until later in life. Very frustrating, hence my attempt to examine all options given that I'm coming to this problem with a large amount of aviation experience already accumulated - just not at the controls...
Thanks again though - I'll keep researching options including those links.