PPRuNe Forums - View Single Post - Elderly fast jet pilots
View Single Post
Old 1st Jul 2017, 01:09
  #36 (permalink)  
Ascend Charlie
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Great South East, tired and retired
Posts: 4,387
Received 226 Likes on 104 Posts
In the 70s in Oz, the OC of the main bomber base, who was a Canberra pilot, decided he had to fly every machine on his base. He had some dual training in a Huey, pronounced himself ready for a solo, and with a Sgt crewman in the left seat (all the squadron pilots disappeared and the Sgt was the only one left sleeping) proceeded to pick up to the hover and have a stinger strike. Normally this requires an inspection, but the Air Cdre continued on and scared the Sgt sh1tless.

Next on his list was the F-111, and again he had some dual trng (VFR only) and declared he would go solo. A navigator who would be able to fly the bird himself was offered as a sacrifice, and away he went. After a short while he told the nav to turn on the TFR. "Sorry sir you are not qualified on TFR."
"TURN IT ON, FLIGHT LIEUTENANT!" - OK it gets turned on, and OC was scooting around at low level, when the TFR decided it had enough, had a failure, and went into a 3-g pullup. OC sits there, watching airspeed decay, as he doesn't understand what is going on.
"Push the over-ride button on the stick, sir..." says the nav.
OC over-rides the TFR and regains some semblance of flight, but when he releases the button it pulls up again. OC says to self "Self! Keep yer finger on the over-ride and it can't fly up like that!" so there he is with finger on button and hand-flying at 450kt at zot feet.

On return, Nav goes to Base XO, a Gp Capt, and relates the story. Gp Capt asks Air Cdre if this is correct, OC replies "The Flt Lt is lying!"

Another base, a few years later, OC decides to fly the Orion. While flopping around the skies, he is passed by a Mirage. He thinks he can show the Mirage a thing or two, so he grabs the throttles and firewalls all 4. However, comma, only the Engineer is supposed to operate the throttles, as the engines are powerfiul enough to overstress the wing under such conditions. And again, with a damaged aircraft, OC blithely continued on.

And if you reckoned YOUR air force was run by dills, this dill made it all the way to the top of ours.
Ascend Charlie is online now