"If you have tears, prepare to shed them now"
"Look, Daddy - No Hands !" .............. "Look, Daddy - No Teeth !"
[CONSO (#43129): read the following sad story from an old Post of mine:]
..."
My second gaffe some time later was really not my fault, but it was to go down in Manby legend. There was nothing on the board (ATC Nirvana !). R/T monitor pipes up: "M-ABCD on 117.9 for you, sir". What followed I will never forget.
Verbatim: "M-CD, Manby Approach, pass your message"...."Manby, CD approaching from the North at 2,000 ft, range 20 miles, request landing instructions"...."CD, 11 left, (QFE), circuit clear, call joining"....
(Manby is Prior Permission Only, we have had no advice of this visitor, but that is not my business: I cannot turn him away - but he must answer for it when he gets down)...."CD, what is the purpose of your visit ?" .... "To drop off a horse" .... "Say again" ...."Horse"...."Spell it !"...."H-O-R-S E" ....."What is your aircraft type ?...."Anson". 
My brain reeled. Reason tottered on her throne. You clutch desperately at straws. "Perhaps it's a very small horse", I consoled myself, "might a Shetland pony go in all right ?" (In my defence, I must add that only a mere dozen years before I'd seen Dak-loads of mules go off, and wished the pilots the best of British).
Now the final bitter twist in the story: Manby had an Equitation Club. My equally stupefied Assistant grabbed the Station phone book: "It's S/Ldr (X) i/c, sir"...."Ring him, tell him he's got a horse coming in in about ten minutes". S/Ldr (X) gets dragged out of Important Conference, not well pleased, organises groom and whistles up horsebox to the Tower. Anson comes in, parks, groom advances with horse-tackle at the ready. Crew see horsebox arrive alongside Tower.
Out of Anson comes a wooden hobby-horse. 
It appears that this was an adjunct to one of the silly games that are played at Dining-in nights. Station (x) had borrowed it from Manby for some occasion, and were now returning it. Pilots roll about Anson in mirth when they realise that they've not only fooled the Controller, but the College as well. (This will keep them in free beer for yonks). Even with door closed, Anson rocks on its oleos for some time before crew sufficiently composed to ask for taxy clearance.
Danny is Buffoon du jour. Joke is all round Manby within the hour, round Strubby by nightfall and all round Lincolnshire by weekend.....
Shouldn't happen to a dawg !
Danny42C.