...then you haven't tried HMRC.
Actually I did yesterday. I used the new Live Chat feature on their website, I was number 3 in the queue, waited 17 second to be be connected to an agent, told them what I wanted (a printed SA302) and after telling them my credentials (dob/address/ni number) was told it was in the post.
Time Taken: 3 mins including typing and waiting time.
Cost: Zero....