OK, I'll bite.
My tellingbone number is a Sahfen' one, and G-UTSY lives there. We wot lives here sez it's
SAHFEN'
If you go any distance away, you'll get the many dialect versions from such places as Bazldn, Wickfud, Chompsfud, and even Riccabilly - all genuine Essex places (with genuine Essex girls resident), but they don't know how to pronounce or spell Sahfen'.
Mind you, given the standard of literacy out here in the marshes, anything's possible.