My mate Rick (RIP) was volunteered for a station parade. During the full ‘Dress Rehearsal’ they had an inspection by the parade commander who stopped at Rick and said.
“Are those your best shoes airman?”
Rick replied
“No sir”
Inspecting officer-
Why didn’t you wear your best shoes airman?”
Rick
“Didn’t think you’d like em sir”
Inspecting officer-
“Why not airman?”
Rick
“Cos they’re Brown Suede Sir”
I too thought it was a tall tail until our new W/Cdr OC Engineering walked into the office saw Rick and said “Still got those Brown Suede Shoes Chief?”