At your first upcoming lesson, tell your instructor you want to fly to a different field for a cup of coffee. No rush, no lesson, no pushing, no teaching, just a pleasure flight to a field maybe some 20 minutes away. Of course you will need to do a bit of navigation, but keep it simple. Follow line features, or even the magenta line on the GPS. One full stop landing, a cup of coffee, smalltalk, and a relaxed flight home. Flying is supposed to be fun, so you need to bring that back and release some of the tension. And don't forget to enjoy the scenery.
If you have an active club that does flyouts or rallies, you can even tell your instructor you want to participate in such an event, together with him/her. As long as you have a pleasure flight, not a lesson. The instructor is just there to make it all legal.
Next lesson, try the following:
- Approach the runway but do not attempt a landing. Keep the flaps up, don't use carb heat, use a speed at least 1.5 Vs0. That equates to maybe some 50% power or 1800-2000 RPM. Fly over the runway, without touching it, in that configuration maybe 20 feet above the runway.
- Next, do the same but use your rudder to compensate for any x-wind, and aileron to maintain the centerline. Don't touch the runway, but go a little lower this time. Maybe 10 feet, or even 3 feet if you feel like it.
- Next, do the same but with the aircraft in the landing configuration. Full flaps, 1.3 Vs0, carb heat on, maybe something like 1700 RPM. But again, the objective is NOT to land, but to fly along the runway as low as you dare. (At the end of the runway, perform a go-around: Full power, carb heat off, slowly raise flaps & pitch for Vy.)
- Repeat the last item a few times until you feel comfortable flying at a very low altitude, and in the landing configuration along the runway. Properly cross-controlled to compensate for any x-wind. But again, do not touch the runway.
- Now do the same thing but as you are again established, slowly close the throttle. Keep the aircraft flying one feet above the ground in the proper configuration for as long as you can. As soon as you hear the stall warner, freeze the controls in pitch only. Do not pitch up any further, but keep on playing with roll and yaw to compensate for the crosswind. You will probably pull off your best landing ever this time.
Using this technique will use a bit more runway than necessary, but it will help you get the right sight picture. As you get more experience you can approach slower, close the throttle earlier and be at or near your touchdown speed when you flare. But you won't be overcontrolling the flare anymore.