Albert's Safari
Kilwhang’s tale at #3126 and #3132 reminded me of a saga from 1998. A captain on 47 was about to leave the Service and join one of the long-haul fleets. He managed to get a decent trip out of Task Plans (Lye to Darwin and back, supporting an E-3 exercise), and managed to persuade the Sqn to give it to him as a swan-song. In Flt Planning on Day 1 the crew met, and an RAAF Flt Lt Snowdrop-equivalent was introduced. He was on Long Look at Innsworth and had got wind of the trip, and as his family were in Darwin he sought and got a seat and a bonus mid-tour trip home.
By the time we got to Darwin we’d got to know this chap quite well, and the Captain had let slip that he had always wanted to see crocodiles – just like the ones in Kakadu Natl Park, just “down the road” from Darwin. You can see where this is going 
The Aussie had explained the booking and comms procedures for flying through Kakadu, so on the morning of departure we filed VFR-to-IFR from Darwin to Singapore. The Captain ensured that we had gassed-up for some time ‘on top’ Kakadu and then pick up the task. Once airborne the skipper had a quick chat off-headset with our guest, then came back on and asked how long to Kakadu.
“Forty minutes that way”.
“By road? What’s our ETA?”.
“Forty minutes that way”.
“Oh $#1t”.
He really hadn’t appreciated how far “just down the road” the park was. We had enough gas to get there and have just under an hour on-top, then climbed out and picked up the IFR Flt Plan. How many crocodiles did he see? Not a single one! 
To this day no-one at Ascot Ops has asked why it took 2 hrs longer than usual to get to Singapore 
Last edited by Vasco Sodcat; 7th Aug 2015 at 12:32.
Reason: add title and then spell it correctly! D'Oh!