Thanks to that idiot German Wings F/O the powers that be have decided that I can't be left alone on the flight deck while the copilot takes a leak, I need to be chaperoned by a flight attendant young enough to be my child.
Furthermore, as the toilet visit procedure is so involved, requiring the blocking off of the lavatory and attendance of another F/A in the forward galley I find it simpler to have a dual visit for both pilots, one after the other should either one require a break.
I've made quite a few bathroom breaks which I didn't really need, simply because the whole rigmarole is such a pain it's not worth it just for one person.
Anyone else finding the same ?
Another robust and important discussion gentlemen
Reminds me of a situation I found myself in a few weeks ago...
Here I was, back of the clock sharing a dark cockpit with yet another whinging Captain, regaling me of his many tales of how hard it was back in the day.
On and on he went.
Then suddenly he went silent.
Stiffened in his seat, eyes wide, I thought he had mistaken Venus for a bogie again and I was guarding the controls expecting him to disconnect the autopilot but alas, it was just his prostrate playing up again and to my relief he just wanted to go back and drain the main vein.
So up came the cabin supervisor, there was a slightly awkward shuffle as he attempted to slip past her lithe form without blushing. But in the faint blue light of the rising moon I could see the red spider veins on his cheek glow in embarrassment as his body pressed past her in his haste to get to the toilet before he pissed his pants.
And there I was. Alone. With my brunette beauty. Her hazel eyes sparkled in the starlight as we gazed at each other.
Finally we had got rid of the old complaining ****w!t and the night sky was ours as we hurtled forwards at greater than 900 kms/hr.
But our time alone was short lived as he mumbled and groaned back into the flight deck, pants wet with piss and complaining about German wings.
Later that night, as he held court in the hotel bar telling everyone how awesome the water injection was in the Metroliner, I winked at my beauty and we relived our precious moments alone in the sky.
So yes, Metro Man.... please keep taking those toilet breaks
Love your work
